i have a son who will 13 in 2 days, for the past year he has been acting lazy,not turning in his homework,not doing his chores well.. he does them but half fast. he goes to school and tells us how good he is doing. when his report cards come home he is failing 3 of his subjects. he has been grounded, things taken away from him, goes to bed early etc.. not to mention the fact we talk. when asked whats going on he say's i don't know. i forgot. the works to hard, so we went to the school spoke to the teachers - the work isn't to hard he wont turn them in, he lets girls borrow his books because they forgot there's. i went through his backpack and found a lot of homework and school work some done others not. i made him go to school and turn it in. still we are having trouble with him he thinks it's not serious. it can be from school to homelife. he apply's this to and i'm getting angry. any thoughts on what i can do to stop this behavior in and out of school? we have tried many things.
2007-03-06 04:41:43 · 7 answers · asked by sassy 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
thanks everyone for your quick response. i know it's not drugs,depression maybe. the girl thing i absolutly believe! i do sit down and go through his homework with him, he wont turn it in on time. theres nothing left to take away from him. he hasn't earned anything back yet it's a daily thing with him. i use to trust him, i could believe anything he said. teen years suck! i hope i have enough strenght to make it.
2007-03-06 05:16:34 · update #1
Sounds like he is 12. It is the same for girls. Something about being 12 is very difficult. They are not old enough for SO many things, yet they are no longer little children either. He has also apparently discovered girls. They are taking advantage of him. That is something he needs learn about...SOON!
As far as what to do...you need to be so structured that he cannot get off track. every afternoon, check the homework, then if he does start doing things right, be sure he is praised.
Hang in there...adolescence is very hard. He will get through it. Just love him but be very firm with him. Don't let him become a slacker. Those habits are too hard to break later!
Best of luck!
2007-03-06 04:56:48 · answer #1 · answered by Bev 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
im going through the same thing with my 12 yr old soon to be 13. i have tried counseling / medication. i dont know what to do either. he just got kicked out of school a couple of days ago, now the school is taking him to see a psychiatrist this morning. i doubt she is going to figure out what his problem is in 45 minutes. when i have taken him to a psychiatrist for a year at a time and they could not tell me what his problem is. the medication never worked, he has been diagnosed with adhd, then later in years they said he was bipolar. he has been on many different medications. so last year i took him off. but i am guessing now that the school is sending him to a psychiatrist they are going to recommend more medication..... its like a never ending cycle. and how much of this behavior is just hormons??????? being a teenager?????? i dont think anyone really knows. i just hope that things dont get worse. good luck!
2007-03-07 09:46:04 · answer #2 · answered by Cornell is Hot! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My son was the same way, but it started when he was 11. He was failing school and everything. I had him tested by several different people and it turned out he had ADHD with oppositional disorder. Once I got him on the medication, his grades went up to B's and A'! However, I did take him off after two years due to the depression it caused, but they have new medication that does not have those side affects. Even if he isn't hyper, he could still have attention deficit disorder.
2007-03-06 14:04:44 · answer #3 · answered by bina64davis 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I see big trouble in the air. The signs are all there. Something is really bothering him, or he is suffering from depression, which is possible. You don't think he is doing any kind of drug do you? Like weed? I sort of went through something just like this, I would highly recommend a therapist. I would assure my son that NO one would know about it, and that you'd make sure he also liked the person he was to talk with. If you don't catch the problem now, you will lose him to something else later. Such has drug addiction. He's a prime candidate. Good luck!
2007-03-06 13:00:20 · answer #4 · answered by sue d 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You guys should make sure he does his work. Have him show you what he's done. Check his backpack everyday. I know when you work, you're busy but he can't be failing his classes, he's barely in high school. What more when he enters high school? Maybe communicate with the teacher every so often to check his progress. Make sure you talk to him about how importan it is not to slack pff in school. Let him know you care about what he does, how he's doing and if you didn't care...you would just leave him be but you're his parent and you want what's best for him.
2007-03-06 13:13:47 · answer #5 · answered by lovin' life... 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What friends is he running with and have you tested him for drugs? Sounds to familiar with a friend of mine.
2007-03-06 13:02:06 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
he is smoking pot, you need to drug test him, you can get a test at any rite aid, or at this age it is hard to think about anything else but pussy!
2007-03-06 13:10:18 · answer #7 · answered by Sir Hard & Thick 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋