can someone help me? mother inlaw big problem?

Question

shes mean in privite nice around people. controlling, manipulater,acts as if we must obey or she yell at u . swears fu** infront of my 1 yr. old. Tells us how to be parents. she has a hold on her son, my husband. i want her out oof our life help

Answer 1

Are you living under her roof ?? If so, you must get out.
She is your husbands Mother so do your best to treat her with respect. I know that is hard to do , but be the bigger person here. Your husband will love you for it. Remember his Mother was his first love. Very different from married love but I think you are smart enough to know what I mean.
Using words like she used are uncalled far, so is yelling and screaming.
Every family deserves to build their lives together. So in separate households you have your own space and privacy. Then your husband should tell his Mother, that you all need space from her for awhile, to work on your lives as a young family.
I married young and had a baby daughter a year later. My mother-in-law would not take us in. She really didn't have room either. My Mother was 200 miles away. An older person took us into his home,then we got a room with a hot plate and running water, had to go into the owners house to take a bath. We lived in make shift places & it was rough. But we made it and so did our little girl.
That was a long time ago. Find away to get some space for yourselves.
Take good care of your little one.~~~~~~~Jill
God Bless you all~~~~

Answer 2

Sorry to say, but if your husband doesn't grow up, and grow some balls, putting it bluntly, and tell his mother to back off, his mother won't stop! His mom might be hurt for a while, but to keep enabling her to act this way is wrong. This will hurt your marriage sooner or later. Either your hubby wants to sleep with his mom or you at night? I believe that we should all respect our parents, but it sounds to me, his mother has crossed the line! If she is swearing like that in front of your son, she needs to take it some where else. It does matter who she hurting, and right now, she is being abusive towards your son! You two don't want that do you? You two would not allow anyone else to do that would you? It's your husbands mother, he's the one who actually needs to take care of this. YESTERDAY!! GOOD LUCK!! If he can't say it to her face, write her a letter, BUT stick by what you say-either way!!

Answer 3

One way to stop someone from making an a** out of you is to bring to light their own downfalls and insecurities,you can do this in private or in public,and you can even do it in a nice way,but it never fails to stop someone from running that lip,when they have to hear about their own weakness and are faced with the truth out loud. As far as her swearing in front of the baby I would say something to her directly and maybe not so nice,if I have to repeat myself. It almost sound like you are a little intimidated by her,is this so? If you are this will continue until you find a back bone to stand up and tell her to mind her own business.Understand? You get what you give.

Answer 4

Kill her with kindness. let the syrup drip from your mouth when you are speaking to her.
Compliment her, no matter what, call her for recipes, bake her cookies, call her once a day and ask how she is.
Over do it and she won't know what end is up or down.
It totally puts her at a loss to challenge you, cause she has no ammunition to use.
Try it out , no matter how hard it is to do.
You have nothing to lose.
Do not be her mid or her battering ram, if she continues the behavior, put her out to pasture.
You and your hubby need to do some serious talking about this, perhaps even counsel ling if she doesn't stop.
He must take a stand, cause you and your son are his family now and the milaw has to respect that and butt out.

Answer 5

Tell that bit** that you are married to her son and NOT HER, you were born from your mother which is NOT HER. You don't have to do sh** she says!!!! Tell your husband to stand up and grow some balls, be a man, towards his mother OR go back and live with that BIT**!!!! Truth is she is probably trying to tell you how to be a parent because she missed out on being a parent when she had the chance!!!

Answer 6

wow that's a really serious situation cuz u dont wan to hurt ur husband by saying something bad about his mother. but u really need to do something about it. let him know that she curses infront of ur son and that u would really appreciate it if she stopped doing that. u will never have her out of ur life cuz that is ur husbands mom and she will always be there. but u can try to keep her out of ur personal business. tell ur husband that he needs to talk to her and make sure that she stays on her own business and that if he doenst do it u will. give him a chance to resolve the issue given that he is his son but if he doesnt then take matter into ur own hands. and he wont have the right to get mad since u gave him a chance to do it himself. is honeslty the best advice that i can give u.. hope i helped... good luck !!!

Answer 7

I'm sorry to hear that. I don't think you'll get your wish of having her out of your life. After all, she is your husband's mother whether you like it or not, however, you need to set her straight and don't let her run your life. Try the nice route first when setting her straight and hopefully it works. Unfortunately, when you marry someone, you also marry their really close family.

Answer 8

This isn't an issue with your mother in law, it's an issue with your husband. You need to talk to him and come to some agreement.

You also need to let your mom in law know that YOU control whether she has access to her grandchild, and if you don't approve of her behavior, she won't be spending time with the grandchild.

Your husband needs to support you. And you need to be sure that you're being clear and fair.

Answer 9

She sounds like a Jezebel, my mother in-law is like that as well, it's very common, you should be able to talk to your husband, but be careful this is a sensetive matter to him so use wisdom and gentleness when you speak to him about this matter, once you have talked to him he may not accept it right away, but after the fact it will become clear to him once he starts to see it for himself, and then he will take action of staying away from her sometimes or talking to her and standing up for you as his wife, for his child and for his self, but you are going to have to do some praying first honey, best of wishes

Answer 10

i know exactly how u feel me and my girlfriend just broke up about a month ago because her mom has this hold over her but i draw the line when it comes to my child. u will have to have a serious talk with him and let him know that his mom is disrupting the family mainly you guys if you don't act know be prepared for a break up or continus fighting that will drive you insane.