A question for the depression/anxiety people?

Question

Im a 44 year old single mother to a 15 year old daughter. Ive been dealing with depression and anxiety for over 10 years now when I was in a very bad physically and mentally abusive relationship that left me with abnormally low self esteem. ive gained 50 pounds...shut myself away from the world, and focused soley on rasing my daughter. Ive been put on meds over the years, but Ive had to quit them because they make me sick. the anxiety is so bad that I havent been able to hold a job in years and Ive been paying my bills with my credit cards. Which Ive been borrowing money to pay the min. i know its wrong, but it was that or be homeless. Right now my income is 300 dollars a month, which is adding to my depression. I feel so helpless. To top it off my world is crashing down even worse because my daughter is getting at an age where she is very disrespectful to me and hurtful. (Shes a good kid...no drugs, good grades.. ) She is making my self esteem even worse. I know im super sensitive.

I cant help it. Im in a situation where Im just going down...and theres no light. I dont know how Im going to pay rent or pay my bills every month, and I cant stop crying to make it thru even a few hours at a job. Im just a wreck. I have an appointment with a counsler in 2 weeks, but was hoping someone had some advice in the meantime. Thanks!

Answer 1

When your depression or anxiety starts affecting your life negatively to the point that you can't enjoy things you used to, or you find it has turned into a handicap, then it's time to talk to a doctor. I suggest doing some "talk therapy" in addition to taking medication because many studies have shown that people who do both improve more than people who just do one or the other. I have suffered from fairly severe depression for over half my life, and I cannot even tell you how different my life is now that I'm taking medication for it. During most of my adolescence I had undiagnosed depression, and it crippled me, plain and simple. Once I started taking medication, I found I was more easily able to control my moods (ie. think positive thoughts and actually feel better) and enjoy fun things. All depression medications have side effects, but there are trade-offs to just about everything. I would not say that taking medication has affected my personality, I still feel like me, just a saner, healthier me who can cope with everything life throws at me. If you start a medication and find that you just cannot live with the side effects, there are many other medications that you can try until you get a good fit. One thing I want to mention is that you have to be patient with medication. Some people take medication for a couple of weeks and then decide that it's not working, so they stop. Others don't like the side effects, so they quit taking it. As long as the side effects aren't debilitating, try to stay on the medication for a bit, even if you don't feel 100% good. Depression medications take awhile to fully work, and oftentimes side effects will show up at the beginning and then go away. Medications for depression are not "happy pills." They will not make you instantly happy, cheery, or unnaturally giddy, unless you were that way before you became depressed. Basically they just let you be yourself. Best of luck, I hope medication helps.

Answer 2

Are you asking for advice to get out of your rut?

If medications aren't helping your anxiety, you'll find that your best bet will be therapy/a counselor. Once you have a handle on your anxiety you'll be able to hold down a job and hopefully get on top of your bills. Alleviating your monetary concerns will do WONDERS for your depression & definitely your anxiety. Plus, getting into a routine of going to work every day will help your depression.

I really hope you find some resolve. I suffer from both depression & anxiety and have found a lot of help in therapy and also within myself. Try to relax & explain your sensitivities to your daughter. She's at a tough age like you said but if you open up to her she'll respect you more and who knows, maybe she'll have some helpful things to tell you.

Good luck to you. :)

Answer 3

You need to be back on your meds, it sounds like your severly depressed and if your anxiety is keeping you from having a job then the medication can help that. There are so many different options when it come to medication. So if something was making you sick another could really help.
Not to stress you out, but with your spending habbits the way they are it isn't long before could be looking at being homeless. You only have 300 dollars to live on and your supporting a child. Your borrowing money to pay money, and that is going to run out soon.
Right now you need emergency assitance, I'm not sure how other states work, I live in Michigan, but go to FIA, apply for foodstamps, and medical assitance so you can see a doctor, second, while your there see if there is assitance with your housing cost, and apply for disablity due to your illness. Until you get a grip on it, and can return to work your going to need these things in place. I understand that with your illness, you probally will find it very hard to go do these things, but understand you have to act now before things get worse.

Answer 4

I am 44 and have been a sufferer of anxiety and panic attacks. I used to become extremely paranoid during a panic attack. I researched this topic in order to deal with my anxiety problem. Therapy and prescription drugs are customary solutions for this problem.

Since therapy is expensive, I took a prescription drug. Like your condition this medicine made me sick. Although in the beginning, it made me feel joyful and relaxed. I also felt that I was becoming dependent on the medicine so I started looking for some alternative treatment.

Hypnosis is one recommendation for anxiety relief but I used a natural remedy to deal with my anxiety problem. I was a little skeptical but I got amazing results. Since you have been suffering from anxiety for the last 10 years, you might consider a combination of hypnosis and a natural remedy.

The best of all, it is not going to cost you much.

You can find more information on the causes and treatment of anxiety from the following source. Since I have been a sufferer I can very well understand in what state of mind you are.....Good Luck!!

Answer 5

try calling social services for your county. They should have a mental health unit that can give you advice. If you have major depression, you may be able to get long-term services (a social worker provides support, like helps you get appointments and get to your appointments, arranges for educational groups from a mental health provider, that kind of thing. Seems weird to have a social worker, but it is helpful). You can also look for a consumer run agency (run by people with mental illness for people for mental illness) google your state, consumer and mental and you should get something. Your mental illness is probalby bad enough that you would qualify for disability through social security, but know that if you go on disability, you will probalby never be able to get off of it.

Good luck!

Answer 6

Remember you are a daughter of God. He is always there and will wait for you to come to him. Your problems may not go away, but you may be strengthened to more easily bear them. There is always hope as long as we have faith.