Is it normal to feel this way?

Question

I just found out last Thursday that I was pregnant. I was so thrilled. Now, though, I am absolutely terrified and depressed. I'm scared of something happening to my baby ( miscarriage, birth defects..). I suppose that I'm depressed because I feel like now that mine and my husbands time is soon to be over and it will be all about the baby. We'll never have that special just the 2 of us again. I'm only 19, but happily married and believe it or not, we were trying for the baby. Why do I feel this way!?

Answer 1

it's totally normal to feel that way. It will get better =)
Congrats on being pregnant. Just take this time to ENJOY things between the two of you. Ie- lay in bed all day on a saturday and cuddle and talk - go out on a whim- do things on the fly.. just enjoy each others company. But it's not bad once you have the baby. It wll take some time to get life back to normal and to where you two can go out- but it can be fun. Sure it sucks you can't be as spontanious- but there is also an excitement in knowing that you dont get to do things alone much so- the anticipation of having 'date nights' is so much fun! You can take the baby to the sitters or have grandma come over early and spend time getting ready- do your hair- your makeup- put on a new outfit! It really makes it more fun and special than just 'going on' on a quick whim.. sure it sucks you can't do that anymore- but it's give and take. Youll learn to spend time together in other ways- ie family time- taking the kids to the park- making it a picninc lunch etc etc.

Answer 2

This is normal. I am now 17 weeks pregnant. I was so excited with both of the pregnancy and have to wonderful little men to show for this. I was so nervous on my baby having birth defects and all the other risk I am going though what you are to. Once your baby gets here all the worries will vanish and the part of just the two of you will melt when you first lay eyes on the 10 fingers and toes and little nose and lips and eyes that look up at you. One of the greatest gifts in the world is becoming a mother. It's normal to worry about your baby growing inside and you are now hit with the idea of the baby being here that's why you feel that way. It will pass. You will get to feel the little kicks and flutters and know that your baby is on the way. :) Go get some pregnancy books and relax!

Answer 3

It's normal. Your body is going through a drastic change, and your hormons are all over the place. And it's a big change having a baby. I gave birth to my daughter on my 22nd birthday, and during my pregnancy I kept wondering if I was "too young." I also worried about not having the "just the two of us time" any more (we had only been married 7 weeks when I got pregnant). But those feelings will pass. It's normal. And it's normal to worry about your baby and miscarriage. It's the "mother's instinct" kicking in already. Everything will be fine, and you'll have your "you" time and your "just the 2 of us" time (with your husband and with your baby). And you'll wonder how you ever could have lived a life without your child when he/she is here. Congratulations Mommy! Enjoy every moment and don't worry. God bless!

Answer 4

It is absolutely normal to be feeling this way. A baby changes everything and you and your husband will have to adjust to the new baby but they baby will bring you so much joy. Words can't describe how happy your baby will make you. When I found out I was pregnant with baby#2, I was thrilled then the reality set in, late night feedings, not being able to go out as much, not being able to vacation as much but all that is worth is jsut to see my baby smile and grow into a little person. Remember that your baby is the product of you and your husband's love. It's your baby. You will probably feel these feelings throughout your pregnancy but things will change once you feel the baby growing inside you. Right now, you're still somewhat shocked, and it's normal to feel a little depressed. Just remember to get your prenatal care and once your appointments become more regular, the excitement sets in. Don't worry, BE HAPPY!!

Answer 5

It's totally normal to be scared. Motherhood is one of those things you really can't do halfway. You're entering into a new phase in your life and you're afraid to leave the old one. As for being worried about you and your husband, I would say your fears are justified, but that doesn't mean your time together is "over" -- You're just starting a new time! When your baby is born, make sure the two of you spend at least one night a week together as a COUPLE, not as parents. Babysitters, in-laws, and family were created for this reason. :-) Everything is going to be alright, I promise. Just stay a couple with your husband-- Make sure your relationship with him doesn't get put to the back burner with all the craziness a new baby brings. I hope all of this helped. Good luck! It's totally normal to feel this way. I promise. :-) *hugs*

Answer 6

Girl, I felt the same way. I have a nine month old baby girl. I was worried that me and my husband would grow apart and time would be lost. When the baby came it made our marriage so much fuller and complete. Our daughter has brought us closer together. You are going to have so many great moments that you will share with your new family now. The first several months are hard because you have to adjust to taking care of a baby, but as the months go on it gets easier and soon giggles will fill the house. I was also worried about my baby having defects , but as long as your going to your checkups, eating healthy and just taking care of yourself everything should be ok. Just focus on enjoying the time now with your husband, being pregnant, and everything will be ok.

Answer 7

It is very natural for you to feel like something bad could happen, especially thru the 1st trimester, it is nerve wrecking, but chances are if you follow the drs orders you and your baby will do fine! Congrats. Also after you have the baby, there is a lot of times when you dont get the quality time together, but after your baby is not so newborn you will get back on track. You have to think of it like now you are a family and you and your husband will love sharing that together, that is what will make you two happy! Congrats again and good luck!

Answer 8

Yes this is totally normal. I am trying for a baby with my boyfriend and I feel exactly the same. I did actually become pregnant in January but had a miscarriage at 6 weeks. So I want it even more now. But I still do find myself thinking, are me and my bf going to have anough time for eachother when it actually happens, are we going to be like those couples that are always moaning at eachother because we now have a child. But I just think as long as you both take part in looking after the child, together. It doesn't have to be one parent looking after the child at a time. And also, after a while, there is no harm in getting a babysitter once in a while. Parents do still need their own time. And although it is them who have decided to have the child and they have a responsibilty to look after it, it is allowed to have a break once in a while to have time together with your partner. don't worry. I bet things will change as soon as you see its little heartbeat too.

Answer 9

It's perfectly OK, & normal, to be worried. Things are definately going to change, but that doesn't mean it's going to be a negative change. Besides that, your hormones are probably going to make you a little moody.
I felt the same way when I was pregnant.
Your husband & you should both educate yourselves about the pregnancy. The more you know, the better you will be, & the easier it will be to accept the changes that you are going to experience.
Talk to him about your fears as well as your excitement. Share the experience with each other.
If he knows what you are going through, he will be more inclined to want to help you through it & it will make you more comfortable.
Talk to your doctor, as well, & tell him/her how you feel. It's very important to have a good relationship with the doctor during the pregnancy. & they may suggest some things that can be helpful to you.
Enjoy your pregnancy. It's a beautiful experience, although it's not the easiest. Good luck to you!

Answer 10

Partly hormones, partly because it is a big change. Try to think of it this way-having a baby is love coming full circle, it is the love of the two of you producing an child that is the flesh and blood of both of you, a person that both of you will now fall in love with together. Don't worry you and hubby will still have special times and memories of your own. Good Luck