Me and my girlfriend have been having problems. She acts like she loves her ex but turns around and says she wants to be with me. We recently broke up and now she says I'm her best friend and when we talk it feels like we're together still she even told me that. She even says she loves me! What should I do? Should I wait on her decision to be with me or not?
2007-03-06 03:31:48 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Me and her have known each other for 5 years and in the 5 years we've been together for 2. Shes not with anyone but she talks about her ex alot and she apparently can't let go of the fact that her ex doesn't want her. I feel like a replacement. I do want a serious relationship and I know she might not. I also know I don't NEED anyone I just wanted some advice to see what others thought on this.
2007-03-06 05:49:20 · update #1
I'm gathering your relationship is a girl-girl relationship, not just a friendship. I was reading the question wrong. If her ex is a guy, and she's calling you a best friend, your relationship is suddenly completely different. I'd walk away from anything more than being friends.
If her ex is a female, and she says she wants to be with you, ask her, "Do you want to be with me or her?" How long is long enough to wait? A day? A week? A month? She's keeping you in limbo while she makes up her mind between you and an ex. She needs to make that decision or you need to move on. She's using you as "second fiddle", the one she can always fall back on. As I said, she needs to make that decision and not leave you hanging.
2007-03-06 09:27:46 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is awkward for so many different reasons. You are getting different answers suited to the personality and experience of those responding. Your girl friend is floundering for some reason. How long have you two been together? Did something suddenly come up to make her start thinking about X? Is X starting a new Thing and now your girl is getting jealous? Can she just be stringing you along as " alternative guy" till she see how things shake out with X. My advice is set a time line for your patience. This might be her way of "letting you down gently". Whatever, it really "sucks" for you. Try not to make yourself available (24-7?) and hang out with friends and family. This reminds me of when I was young. ( Girls can be players to). Good luck. A lot of us have been there.
2007-03-06 11:56:12 · answer #2 · answered by make room for daddy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell her how you feel. dont hold anything back and give her some time to figure out what she wants but dont wait around forever! give her a few weeks-3 at the most- for her to get things together, and in the mean time you also be talking to other people, be parperd for her to say that she doesnt want o be with you, and be parperd for her to say that she does, dont get your hopes up on one thing though! cause if it is not what your expecting, then your only going to get hurt! get luck girl! if you need any more help you can email me at:
justinsbabygirl_4eva@mayspace.com or
sicerrahazelwood@yahoo.com
2007-03-06 11:39:31 · answer #3 · answered by sexy momma 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She sounds chaotic, and she just wants someone to dance with her. You seem like you want a serious relationship, and not this silly nonsense. If I were you, I would just tell her "I care about you a lot, but I can't keep doing this. If you want to be with me, be with me. If not, good luck with your life and I hope you find happiness." If she doesn't immediately pick you and back up her conviction with action, move on!
2007-03-06 11:35:44 · answer #4 · answered by a-mac 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is called being "non-committal". Yes, women have this problem too. One of the symptoms is harbouring feelings. Your girlfriend just has problems with the unresolved issues that lay in her past. Let her go, and get on with your own life. If she comes back to you, there you have it.
2007-03-06 11:39:00 · answer #5 · answered by Tink 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
By waiting for ANYONE, you give them all the power. You need to go out and HAVE FUN. Make yourself UNAVAILABLE To this person. People always want what they cant have, if she begins to think that you dont need her, or if you start talking to someone else... She will decide FAST what she wants. Good luck
2007-03-06 11:34:49 · answer #6 · answered by Angel Eve 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
NO!!! she odviously wants to keep u around in case things go wrong in her new relationship, in other words when thingz go wrong youll be there to cheer her up and then catch u on da back burner!! keep it moving and move on w/ your life!!
2007-03-06 11:45:19 · answer #7 · answered by Katt 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why would you want to wait for HER to make up HER mind to see if SHE wants to be with you.....are you not worth more that to sit around and wait for someone to decided what you are going to do with your life? You decide, and if you are available when she is free of what ever, then you decide if you want to be with her.
2007-03-06 11:35:12 · answer #8 · answered by NolaDawn 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
apperantly u loves here much- but she is not much devoted. u could wait to see if she want to stay with u but do not but much hope on her she does not seem much honest with her relations. could love the many guys & not emotionally commited.
take care & take it easy
2007-03-06 11:37:23 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her how you feel, tell her to make her mind up, let her know how you feel when she mentions her ex to you.
2007-03-06 11:34:37 · answer #10 · answered by sweetladytease 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋