When asking to see a future sister in law's new engagement ring, I was surprised to see a very small diamond chip. It was a surprise because I am sure the groom could have afforded more. I just said "awww, bobby" (the groom) in a cutesy way. What would have been a better way to respond?
2007-03-06 03:29:25 · 20 answers · asked by saveit 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
I bet your response sounded a lot better to everyones ears than it sounded in your head. I went through this too once. It was with a girl I didnt know, we were out trying on wedding dresses at the same time and she asked to see my ring and so I asked to see hers. Hers was much smaller and my reaction, in my mind, was kind of rude, like "Oh how sweet" I was so mad at myself for saying something so assinine as well as condescending, but my mother out of the blue when we were driving home said "You were very nice about that girls ring" and when I told her how I wasnt happy how I handled it she told me I was very nice and complimentary without sounding snotty about it. I bet you were too. We always over analyze ourselves, but I am sure your response was taken very kindly by everyone in the room.
2007-03-06 07:15:52 · answer #1 · answered by kateqd30 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you did what you should have done, been kind and said "aww". The value you place on the diamond may not be the same value that she and Bobby place on the diamond. If she's already feeling bad about the small size of the diamond, pointing out how small it is wouldn't have helped. And because you feel he could have afforded more, perhaps they both decide to save on the ring and put the money towards the wedding or a down payment on their first home. The point is you don't really know the situation so you can't really say.
2007-03-06 04:20:33 · answer #2 · answered by Brandy 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
The proper response is always a thrilled CONGRATULATIONS (and possibly a hug). To insult her ring and her fiance (no matter how you're related to him) is rude and makes you seem like a petty snob. Did it occur to you that maybe that was the ring she wanted? Maybe he was planning to upgrade later? Maybe they are planning on using the money for something important, like a house or children?
When we got engaged I had a very small ring, but I had picked it out myself. It was exactly what I wanted at the time, and it's still just what I want (although we have upgraded the diamond a little, it's still under a carat). The ring represents the committment and the marriage, but it's not important at all. The marriage is what's important --- when I see a huge ring I always suspect that one of the partners has a messed up view of what's important and is too materialistic to make a good spouse.
2007-03-06 06:22:33 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I actually wanted a small ring just because i don't wear alot of jewelery and i'm not big on big jewelry. Plus i think that that money could be well spent somewhere else--like school, car or a house, instead of on some piece of jewelry. Maybe that was the ring she wanted and wanted the small diamond....don't worry about the size of the diamond--money and size doesn't matter, it's what the ring means to her...I think your response was perfect, but don't mention any more about it....
2007-03-06 05:25:15 · answer #4 · answered by stellniel 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think we have all been in similar situations before. It's best to train yourself to say the same thing, no matter the person or ring. Like "WOW..that's some ring!" or "Gorgeous, just gorgeous, you must be thrilled!" Personally MY line is "Oh my gosh..that is a stunning ring!" Sometimes I actually mean it when I say it, and other times it has saved me from making a dumb comment. It's the same thing with babies...we have all seen some, um, odd looking infants, but what do you say? You have to be prepared before you see the kid so you don't hurt anyone's feelings.
2007-03-06 04:05:19 · answer #5 · answered by MelB 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Maybe she didn't want a huge rock! I have had people ask me why I didn't go for the carat (I have a .66 carat middle stone, thank you!) and one of , and most important reason is that it looked stupid on my hand! Also, my center diamond has the very best color and clarity that you can you can get.
A better way to respond is, "It is just beautiful! Congratulations!"
Just because it is not your taste doesn't mean it is not the ring of her dreams.
2007-03-06 03:57:38 · answer #6 · answered by chickemama 3 · 5⤊ 0⤋
The ONLY way to respond is "Oh that's beautiful." Deep down she knows it's a small ring, and deep down she probably can't stand it. And sadly, she probably knows deep down that her hubby to be probably could have afforded a lot more. So if this is any indication of what their marriage will be like, then I feel sorry for her. But all in all you said the right thing. NEVER turn your nose up to somebody's engagement ring! EVER!
2007-03-06 03:39:56 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 3⤊ 1⤋
"That is such a beautiful diamond and ring"
so what if its small? its not on YOUR finger.
I'd rather someone spend a lot of money on a car or house instead of an engagement ring. Do you want them to go into debt that quickly after saying "I do"?
2007-03-06 05:38:27 · answer #8 · answered by Terri 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps that is what she wanted, an engagement ring does not have to have a diamond big enough to choke a horse.
2007-03-06 05:26:48 · answer #9 · answered by sparkleythings_4you 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I actually had someone once ask me why my husband got me a smaller ring then what he could have. I LIKE IT!!! It was the perfect ring that I've always wanted. Some women just dont like huge nasty look things. Some like it simple, theres nothing wrong with that. Just because YOU might not have liked her ring, doesnt mean that SHE didnt.
2007-03-06 03:43:10 · answer #10 · answered by Kasandra 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋