Many people have racist parents who don't approve of their son or daughter dating someone from another race but mine seem to be a little unusual.
They wouldn't have a problem with me dating a black girl, but they would have a problem if my sister dated a black guy. She can date asian guys or a guy from any other race but she can't date black guys.
Obviously they are not totally racist towards black people because they wouldn't have a problem if I dated a black girl. When I ask them why, they say they are just concerned about my sisters safety and well being and wouldn't want to put that risk by letting her date black guys. I accused them of stereo-typing blacks guys, but they countered that by saying: "It's better to be safe than sorry".
2007-03-06 03:18:38 · 29 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
My parents were the same way. I think they fear a mixed race pregnancy. In their eyes a mixed race baby has a difficult time in the world today. It would be accepted by neither the white race or the black race. Just how they think its old school. I cant say I agree entirely but it is what it is and they cant be changed.
2007-03-06 03:22:29 · answer #1 · answered by Devdude 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It seems to be a case of an exaggerated double standard. As a male, you can "take care of" yourself, no matter who you date, but she, being "just a girl", can't, so they need to protect her. Yes, they are stereo-typing black guys, but I think that it may carry over more than you think. I'm sorry that your sister is being excluded from dating blacks that way. It is a shame. Do they at least let them into the house? My mom was fine with everybody, but my dad actually would not even let a black guy into the house to come to a party I had in high school! Such a shame that this still goes on today.
2007-03-06 03:24:31 · answer #2 · answered by Yahzmin ♥♥ 4ever 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The thing is girls are a a greater risk of getting hurt by there dates. While boys do not. And your parents just think that black guys might be a little more aggresive towards there dates that is all.
(why dont they like black guys people with different skin colors can do the same thing as the black guys can)
2007-03-06 03:23:18 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
They probably have more of a stereotype of black male behavior in their minds. I'm betting your parents would probably be OK with an individual if they got to know him first. I have that same mental mind problem with my daughters' dating middle eastern men. Why? Because of the stereotypes that I've accumulated during my lifetime in dealing with middle eastern men. (I've had several who, in the business world, pretend that they can't hear me at meetings. Why? Because I'm a woman and it's beneath them to take "counsel" from a woman or to do business with her. Some have even refused flatly to do business with my foundation if I sit in on meetings.) I'm not saying they are ALL that way, but I've come into contact with enough that I would be VERY WARY if my daughters started dating them.
I CAN see why they don't mind their son dating black women. Black women have a VERY positive stereotype. They are strong and hard working and GREAT parents.
2007-03-06 03:24:09 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, that does sound racist, unless of course they just object to your sister dating period......I am a mom and I don't want my daughter dating a white, green, black, orange or any guy that I think will hurt her or that is a loser......but the thing is, she is 21 and will date who she pleases and my in put is worthless and the more I complain about her choices, when she was a teen, the more determined she was to do whatever she knew I didn't want her to.....sometimes it back fires!!!!
2007-03-06 03:25:19 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Parents are really hard people to work out. I know because I am one and sometimes I have no idea why I react as I do. Our main concern is our kids safety I think, cos we are absolutely terrified of losing them, and we can sometimes have pretty weird ideas as to how to best achieve that. There is too much crap in the papers these days that reinforces stereotypes, and parents are very susceptible to those. Even tho underneath we know we are generalising. Daft huh? Just be patient with your parents. They'll get there in the end!
Jx
2007-03-06 03:26:04 · answer #6 · answered by kirroyale3 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That is a little weird, it seems to me that they are sterotyping black guys in general. What do they think, that asians, or any other race can't or won't do the same things that a black guy can do? They are very close minded individuals. I hope that you and your sister don't share the same views, or pass them on to ur children.
2007-03-06 03:23:00 · answer #7 · answered by The QUEEN of EVERYTHING! 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't know that your parents are stero-typing of not. Your parents are going by what they have seen on teh news and in the community. Unfortunantly, what we see in the media is not good, It shows a great deal of young men engaging in illegal behavior of all types, and even black women can tell you that alot of the black males treat women badly, but black women are very well known for taking a stand against them. Black women on the other hand, typically do not engage in a great deal of illegal behavior. Studies have been done, where black women have been asked, why they date with men, and they have said, its because they have had enough of beign treated in teh manner in which the men have treated them. But when the majority of what we see is negative of the black males, then of course your parents do not want their daughter your sister involved in this, they want her to be safe....don't you? And to those of you who are ready to attack me for saying what I did.....I would suggest that you prove everyone wrong....change your behavior. Blacks are no longer opressed....except by yourselves, when you say and think just because "well they all think We are this way so I am going to show them"....Needless to say it is not working......you have to get out there and believe in yourself,,,,,know that you can and are better than what is beign shown in the media. And it is not the medias fault, if you don't want the attention to be negative.....then start a positive movement within your communities.....it is time to empower ppl to do better, not just survive......we all have this drive to do and be better and the best citizens.....no more excuses for bad behavior......just get out and start doing better.
2007-03-06 03:37:33 · answer #8 · answered by mrs_endless 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't worry i have a similar situation. My parents have no problem with my brother dating a black girl but i once dated a black guy and they didnt know till i introduced him to them and they flipped but im ok to have black guy friends. its rediculous. I think they are just looking out they cant be racist but they may be sterio-typing them.
2007-03-06 03:56:37 · answer #9 · answered by Ex- Cheerleader 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what your parents are really saying is that alot of people call girls bad names for doing certin things, but a guy can do them same things and not be called anything! alot of people that see a white girl with a black guy call her names and say that they are nasty! but when they see a white guy with a black girl they say nothing1 your parents just dont want your sister to have to deal with the name calling. but still! it is messed up! people date to get a chance to have something they have always dreamed of, not for there skin color!
2007-03-06 03:28:37 · answer #10 · answered by sexy momma 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋