Do u think my grandma is Wrong? please help me?

Question

My grandmother spoils my mom's boyfriend lil girl. She tells the lil girl to call her grandma. My mom and her BF told her to stop cuz she has grandparents and they dont want to confuse her. But my grandma keeps buying gifts for this lil girl. The thing thats messed is that my grandma has other lil great grand kids and she doesn't even acknowledge them. My grandma will call the our house and ask about that lil girl. My mom tells her "Hey why dont u ask about ur real grandchildren. I dont remember u acting like with ur real grandkids. Which is true. I have a lil boy and hell no he aint gonna come 2nd , especially to that lil girl. Some of my family agrees with me, and some think im jeolous. Which is dumb cuz all i want to for all the kids to be treated equally. what do u think?

Answer 1

First of all you apparently don't want them to be treated equally, since you've stated in your question that your son won't come second to "that li girl". If I were you I would be glad that she accepts her like her own kin. How would you feel if your boyfriends grandma treated your son really good and everyone else bitched about it. She's a child and who cares if she's loved by one more person....it does sound like your jealous to me!!!! And a child can have more than one set of grandparents.! I thin k your man needs to wisen up and go find a real woman who loves and adores his little girl. She will always be more important and more loved by him and apparently others as well.....so get use to it!!!!

Answer 2

I am a grandmother of three biological granddaughters and two step grandkids (boy and girl) through the relationship that my daughter has with her fiance.

I can tell you right now that I embrace ALL of them. I would never put a stranger's baby before my own. I'm going to acknowledge all of the grandchildren EQUALLY. Your grandmother needs to straighten up. If she has a negative view or she plays favorites with this little girl over her own biological grandchildren I think it is time to sit down with HER and find out what is the movtivation? Is it revenge? Is it because she actually does not like the other kids or is it because she honestly doesn't see the problem with what she is doing. I find the latter hard to swallow in her case.
Get grandmom alone to avoid embarrassment on her part. Then tell her face to face so you can gauge her responses. Tell her either she acknowledges ALL or NONE! She should get it right after that. Good luck!

Answer 3

I agree with you 100% your grandmother should treat all of the grandkids the same instead of putting one before the other.

My husbands mother does the same thing to my daughter (her first born grandchild). She now has 5 grandkids (2 of which are my children) and she has NEVER attened one of my children's b-day parties does not call to check on them during the week, or anything like that. But always spends time with the other 3 grandkids. So I understand how you feel.

Just tell your grandmother how you feel and if that does not work then stop bringing your child around as often as you do and she will begin to understand that she needs to pay attention to ALL of her grandkids and not just your mom's bf lil girl.

Answer 4

I think that all of the children should be treated equally. Have you tried to talk about this to your Grandmother and if you have and she continues to show favoritism, then you will have to make sure that your child does not feel slighted. I would buy a gift for whatever occasion for my little boy and then tell my grandmother that you did this and are going to tell him that it is from her because you do not want your child to feel slighted, this may do the trick and make her think about her actions. If this does not work, move forward and just be the best Mom that you can be to your child.

Answer 5

I think I see jealousy running amuck!!!!!!!!
YOUR Grandma must see something in this child that she is attracted to or she wouldn't be that way. either she sees a child unloved or she sees a child the way she would want her grandchild to be. Take a good look at your family history. has there been words or deeds done that have caused the rift?? LOVE HAS NO BOUNDS and if your not showing love you usually won't get love back. EQUALLITY is not how it works. Go to Grams and tell her your feelings DON't tell her WHAT TO DO> ALL you'll get is bad vibes that way. She may have a perfectly legit answer if you ask.

Answer 6

She is probably just going overboard- because the girl isnt really her grandchild- and she wants the child to feel accepted and part of the family- I think he intentions are good- she is just going about it the wrong way- but i know from experience you arent going to change her. Just don't take it personally against you or your kids or her other grandchildren.

Answer 7

You can want what you want, but it's not your decision. The situation is out of your hands. Some things in life you just can't change and this isn't something that you need to worry yourself over. Your grandma is her own (probably old) person and one day she will no longer be around. So just deal with it.

Answer 8

I agree with you. She actually sounds sort of immature (no offense) and she should treat all her kids equally and pay more attention to her real grandchildren!

Answer 9

i think your grandmother is unfair i think every child should be treated the same my granny used to do the same to me until i had a talk with her now she understands and treats us all fair

Answer 10

It may be wrong, but she's a grown woman and she's going to act how she wants to act. There's really nothing you can do about it.