Ladies, where would you draw the line when a man messes up?

Question

I abide by the one strike screw up policy, am I too harsh? I am sick of giving these men a second chance when they lie or cheat, etc.

Answer 1

I'd stick with your policy. I was with a man who I loved very much and I gave him chance after chance to do the right thing and make the right decisions. I ended up getting hurt very very bad. Now the relationship is over and I'm left with a terrible broken heart. What was the point of putting up with all his crap if the relationship ended anyways? If I could go back, at the first sign of trouble, I would have gotten the hell out of there!

Answer 2

I definitely agree with the one strike policy especially if it's in the early stages I was seeing a guy for a few weeks then one week everything changed and he started becoming manipulative so I got out as quick as I could Life is to short and we shouldn't take each other for granted.

The problem is that we don't learn our lessons the first time...I was married very young and had a stable relationship with a reliable man and after it was over I always expected to be treated like a queen...but it didn't happen that way I was very hurt by the next guy...and I learned that if it's not meant to be there will definitely be signs in the beginnig...always trust your gut one of gods gifts to us.

Answer 3

Drugs or abuse. I can forgive anything else, but drugs or abuse are serious deal breakers! I have three precious girls, and I don't want that **** around my babies. Also, if the guy turns into a raving alcoholic, I will walk. Whether I love them or not.

I disagree with the person who says that there are no strikes in love. Yeah, there are, too. If your were getting the living crap beat out of you on a daily basis, love wouldn't have anything to do with it. I know, I've been there. I'd die FOR my husband, but I'll be damned if I die BECAUSE of him.

Answer 4

I firmly believe that a man should be dropped the first time he's caught cheating....I've dated a cheater, gave him another chance, then he cheated again. Typically, cheaters are habitual.

But lying? I don't know, it depends on how serious the lie is. If it's some minor lie to keep me from getting angry or nagging at him, I can excuse a few of them...any serious lies, nope.

Answer 5

No one is perfect, but i have always had the theroy that everyone deserves a second chance, however, if they are going to cheat on you, that will never change, and if they are going to do that they really dont want to be with you anyways, so they need to just go. Love is a splendid thing. , it should be cherished, and if they truly love you they wouldnt do it in the first place.

Answer 6

These would do it in one strike for me:

1. Hitting (although he'd get a good sock in the nose himself first!);

2. cheating;

3. major lying;

4. drugs/ excessive drinking;

5. standing me up/ canceling advance plans, except in case of emergency (and even then he'd better call unless he's unconscious).

Basically, anything that shows a flagrant lack of respect for me would earn him a trip through the exit door.

Answer 7

Try to set up some rules in the start. Say what you cant stand or forgive so there is no need for second chance...if they make mistake:bye bye...

Answer 8

Well you need to be more specific..the cheating..get rid of him!!!!!but the lie was it a stupid silly lie? Cheating is a big deal.

Answer 9

Depends on the situation. Cheating, hitting, etc., it's once and he's out (before I was married... it's a little more complicated once married I think)

Answer 10

Cheating is an absolute end, white lies generally are OK but major lies are a deal breaker. Drugs are also a deal breaker.