We've been playing n a band 2gether for a couple of months.One night after practice he leaned over & kissed me.A couple days went by & nothing was said about it so,I called him & asked him why he kissed me.He said he was attracted to me n several ways.We hung out once @ a bar w/ our band(we agreed 2 keep it from the band)no affection was exchanged.A day or so later he called me & said the age was a problem & his past experiance w/ a younger gal (28yr old for 3yrs) has made him pullback.So we kept it strickly music for a month or so.A group of us went to a pub & drinks were had & I wound up at his house,for the night.He said it was "dreamy".A week later another night was spent in his bed.Still insisting on a nonrelationship mind set he gives me little kisses and holds my hand when no ones looking.I sent him a text saying "Ur an amazing man,I want to get closer and closer, I just wish I knew how you felt"he replied"my life is stressed".Am I moving to fast or is he just in it for the"fun"
2007-03-06 00:53:57 · 16 answers · asked by luvnlife 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Also, in that very conversation I suggested that maybe I shouldn't hang w/ him so much because of my feelings for him. He's obviously not into me as I am into him. He said "I'm in the driver seat" so I make the decision on who and where we are???? I just don't know what to do. I don't want a serious relationship but I don't want to dismiss my feelings for him. I am moving in about 2 months or so 2 1/2 hours away but only for about a year BUT will be back in town everyother weekend. Its not like we won't see one other. He;s VERY busy and needs alot of "him" time. So do I. I think it would work if maybe I could not feel so strong for him.
2007-03-06 01:06:15 · update #1
He is probably moving at this pace because he is older and alot wiser! Take it slow and let things happen when they happen. Sounds like you might be falling hard...step back and take it slow. If it is meant to be it will happen. Good luck
2007-03-06 01:00:06 · answer #1 · answered by poodlemama1965 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-12-18 06:51:19 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
As an "older guy" I too have a girlfriend who is 20 years younger than me. We are soon to be married but it took 3 years to get here!
Older men who have either been married, or have dated for a few years, tend to "shy away" from a committed relationship that so many younger women seek. They often fear lack of communication, understanding of "your generation and more.
I think you are doing the right thing by giving him the space he needs to make the decision to commit to you, or to keep it at a friendly level.
He may also be concerned about possible repercussions from friends and family, should it be taken to the next level.
2007-03-06 00:59:59 · answer #3 · answered by replycs 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think he is in it for the fun. I think he has created an enviroment that gets him what he wants without a commitment. Be careful not to get to close to this gentleman. He seems to have discovered a willing strategy to get young women into bed. He should publish a how to book and he would be a millionaire in todays world. Ha
2007-03-06 01:02:02 · answer #4 · answered by Devdude 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me like he's just in it for the fun. You know the story about free milk and a cow? Well, I think that applies here.
You could always ask him straight out what he wants out of your relationship. That's the thing about older guys...no games, just hard straight truth. Maybe that's what he's looking for.
Good luck.
2007-03-06 00:59:20 · answer #5 · answered by Tater 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like he's just in it for the fun, and you are moving a bit fast as well.
2007-03-06 01:02:56 · answer #6 · answered by bladeshaven 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course he wants to be "into" you....All men 40+ want to have sex with a woman in their 20s but I wouldn't go thinking he's gonna marry you or anything!
2007-03-06 01:15:48 · answer #7 · answered by Karen 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Should be careful with such older guys. He is mature enough to say he wants a relationship or not...
2007-03-06 00:58:17 · answer #8 · answered by loves_nature 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he is in it for the fun to me.
2007-03-06 00:57:17 · answer #9 · answered by chris m 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like he is a little gun shy about ya. Just give it time.
2007-03-06 01:05:49 · answer #10 · answered by The Answer Guy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋