I had a relationship with this man on and off for the past 19 years. The reason We never got married was due to my disfunctional family. He just couldn't take it. I promised myself when he got married, I was not going to let him hurt me again. Well the past few months we have been chatting a lot, and reminissing about old times. At times the conversations have turned very sexually explicit. We have always been very attracted to each other. No matter how long we were apart, when we got back together it was as if we had been together always. I know I love him, and always will. Latley he has been wanting to come and see me, and basically trying to get back together. I know he is still married. How should I break it to him that as long as he is still married, I can't possibly be with him.. And how do I convince myself of this because it is getting really hard. Any suggestions???
2007-03-05 23:05:25 · 7 answers · asked by hippychic3737 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
By getting into "sexually explicit" conversations with him,you've already let him know that you accept his circumstances and behavior and will put up with anything,even if that means playing second fiddle to the girl he "did " marry.Don't fool yourself here or you will just end up in more pain.
Leave him alone and find a new guy who is not married like he is.
He did not marry you.Accept it and move on or it will keep coming up to bite you in the ....
2007-03-05 23:12:13 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Happy or unhappy it dose not matter he is married. Just tell him you won't have any thing to do with him that way until you see the final divorce papers. He sounds like he is just looking for some fun on the side and knows that since you have had feelings for him you will be an easy target so to speak. When you start to feel weak and might cave into his wants remember the pain he has caused you in the past and go take a cold shower... after telling him to do the same.
2007-03-05 23:13:01 · answer #2 · answered by debcat76135 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't let him have his cake and eat it too. You are completley right about not messing with him while he is married because why would he ever have to leave his wife if he can have you both. Just keep telling yourself if you can't have it all the you don't want nothing at all. It's is not about breaking the news to him it's letting him now your a respectable women who yeah still has love for him but doesn't want to that the "other women". good luck coming from a divorced wife who wished all "other women" though like you!!
2007-03-05 23:15:44 · answer #3 · answered by renesarah1209 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have seen this many times before and it boils down to one thing.
Sex because he is now bored, if you try to get him to leave his wife for you, he will probably give you every excuse in the book why he can't, or he will promise to "when the time is right".
I know personally of two women in that trap, one for over 30 years and the other for 8 years.
The time still isn't right and these stupid women are still following "their" men around like lovestruck puppies!
2007-03-05 23:14:05 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have one of my ex's who tried to put me in a situation like this, and I won't have nothing to do with him. You need to realize he didn't appreciate you when you were together and he married someone else. He made that choice and he needs to live with his decision. Don't give in to him (he's married - he'll just hurt you) because he WILL NOT leave his wife for you. Go find someone else, he's not worth your time.
2007-03-05 23:38:14 · answer #5 · answered by Martini Babee 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that is hard.just keep telling yourself its wrong.you know its not right to be with a married man,think if you wrere his wife how would you feel.dont do it its wrong.if they divorce for some reason then you can but dont do anything yet.just tell him that if he really cares about his wife then he should know not to do that and if he doesnt they shouldnt be together.and that you arent doing anything with him unless he is single.
2007-03-05 23:12:35 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you just said it, now say it just like that to him, none until he is divorced.
and you already know how this will be, he is not leaving his marriage, cost too much money.
2007-03-05 23:13:49 · answer #7 · answered by countryboy1959 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋