My wife to be and myself are arguing over whether to put the dress code on our wedding invites. I am wearing a tuxedo as is my best man, father and father in law and want everybody else to wear black tie and evening wear however my fiance doesnt want to put this on the invitations. What does everybody else think? I just dont want half the people turning up in jeans and shirts (smart casual) and half the people turning up in evening. HELP.
2007-03-05 22:31:13 · 26 answers · asked by hoser45678 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Try to remember, some guests will want to attend your wedding, but may not be able to afford a new suit/tux. But I do understand your concern.
Why not put 'Smart dress code. No jeans please.'
This will make it clear that you're not wanting guests to turn up in jeans, but they will understand the smart dress code. Dont try to make all the lads wearing the same type of suit. You will want to distinguish you, the best man and family relations. I would say most people will turn up in a suit (some with, somewithout a tie) and a plain white or tinited shirt. The lasses will jump at the chance of a lovely new frock, so no worries there.
I think that would be a good way to put your point across.
2007-03-05 23:09:33 · answer #1 · answered by Need_to_know 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's normal for the groom and best man, as well as the groomsmen and fathers, to be in tuxedos. That doesn't mean that your guests need to be so formal.
If you put black tie on the invitations, then some people will come in evening wear. Some people will ignore this completely and come however they want. And some people (you'd be surprised how many) won't come at all becaue they don't want to be bothered with having to buy special evening wear for your wedding (remember, most people don't already own black tie attire).
If you leave it blank and don't mention a dress code at all, then most people will wear nice clothes (like dressy church wear). One or two people might get dressed up a bit more, but its unlikely. And one or two people might come in jeans, but that's also unlikely.
What you really need to think about is what is more important. Being surrounded by people who care about you and your marriage, or what the people around you are wearing?
2007-03-06 01:44:03 · answer #2 · answered by Pink Denial 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's your wedding and if you want the guests to wear black tie then you tell them on the invitation. As most family members will know through word of mouth it would be more embarrassing for others who turn up inappropriately dressed. If any guest doesn't want to wear what you have decided then they can easily make a polite excuse and send a regret card. Best wishes for your wedding and the future.
2007-03-06 06:36:52 · answer #3 · answered by Ms Mat Urity 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it's really important to you then it should go on the invites- people need time to find (and maybe save for) an appropriate outfit. I doubt people would wear jeans to a wedding, but maybe if there are one or two people you know who might then you could warn them individually with plenty of time, rather than write it on invites. But there will always be one or two who ignore the rules because; they feel so uncomfortable dressed so smartly, they can't afford a new outfit, the simply have a different idea to what your dress code means for them so be prepared to be a little dissappointed and ask yourself whats more important; that everyone turns up and enjoys themselves? or that they look the part?
2007-03-06 04:06:47 · answer #4 · answered by emily_jane2379 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you want people to dress in formal wear, meaning tuxedos for the men and evening gowns for the women, you have to put "Black Tie" on the invite. If you dont put black tie no one will know that they are to wear tuxes and gowns. If you just want people to dress in suits and nice dresses, you can put "black tie optional" which means that its a dress up affair. But I dont know where you are from, where I am from weddings are always dress up, so we dont need to be told. But if you run the risk of people showing up in jeans (really?) then you need to put it in writing that its not acceptable.
Good luck.
2007-03-05 23:06:37 · answer #5 · answered by kateqd30 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think anyone would turn up in casual clothes such as jeans and t-shirts, but if you are really worried, it might be best to put a small note on your invite. If anyone is thinking of turning up in casual clothes, it will spare you and themselves of feeling uncomfortable about it at the venue. It's a once in a lifetime occasion, so it's best to be sure than sorry later!
Having said that, I have not mentioned any dress codes on our wedding invite, nor have I seen any invites with such notes, but I have never encountered anyone in smart casual.
BTW, I'm not sure jeans applies to smart casual....
Have a great wedding !
2007-03-05 22:48:59 · answer #6 · answered by alphacharlie 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sorry people, but unfortunately, in my part of the country it is not unusual to see someone show up at a wedding in jeans and a t-shirt. I think if you want people to dress nicely, then say it on the invitation. But as one respondent said, expect some people not to come because of it.
2007-03-05 22:48:02 · answer #7 · answered by jingles 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would mention on the info you send out with the invites that the bridal party will be in tux's and evening wear. No-one will want to commit a faux pas of turning up in jeans if they are aware what the rest of the congregation will be wearing.
2007-03-06 03:00:07 · answer #8 · answered by Bagpuss 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should put it on the invites, thats wear it generally goes. Whether you decide on smart casual or black tie, clarify this on the invites
2007-03-05 22:34:57 · answer #9 · answered by f_jayce 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you want a dress code you should put on the invite we invite our guests to wear .... or it is the brides request that you wear then it is still optional but people know
2007-03-06 05:21:12 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋