if your paranoid about people at alot of times, and think they are against you?

Question

will you unconsiously display hostility and aggression towards people in your behaviour and attitude towards people?.....whats the treatment for this?........... how do you undermine this way of thinking?...ive been recentley diagnosed with borderline personality disorder, but also experience (regularley)~ very low bleak moods, paranoid feelings and great anxiety feelings. ive withrawed into my flat and feel incredablly worried about going out, incase of rage attacks, & have great anxiety about people and going out. i also feel uncomfortable that people stare or look and that i might be provoked into staring back, which then might cause a rage attack in me, where in the past has resulted in me losing control & the been 'driven' into confrontations, like a loss of control over impulse. .will i need medication for these symptoms? i saw a psychiatrist recentleyfor a second assesment,& he said medication wasnt the answer with borderline personality.but to more concentrate on psychotherapy

why am i enraged bitter, jealous about other peoples happiness, grins, giggles, smiles and the ease of which comes for them to crack a giggle, smile, laugh? when im tormented all the time

everybody seems happy except me...like their having happy, merry lives and iiimmm not!! (teeth clench) im a physically aging 29 year old. all i see is fresh, happy go lucky, youthfull faces, that surround me

Answer 1

The symptoms you describe are also symptoms of 'borderline personality disorder'. Medication is sometimes used to help, but yes, the focus is more concentrated on psychotherapy.

Answer 2

Borderline Personality Disorder is best treated without medication and psychotherapy is the best method, particularly CBT. Marsha Linehan developed a skills training manual for folks with those particular issues that you may find helpful, but group treatment is the best option as it gives you a safe place to practice new behaviors. I would also recommend that you read the book "I Hate You, Don't Leave Me" in order to develop some insight into the dtnamics and origins of the disorder.
The simple answer to why you feel such rage towards people who are happy (or appear to be) is jealousy because they have what you are seeking and find so elusive right now. It's hard to see others who are not in pain when you feel so much pain yourself and you have a tendency to mistrust that any overtures of friendship may be genuine because it isn't what you yourself feel towards other people.
Borderline personality has its roots in early childhood experiences which lacked the necessary ingredients for you to develop trusting relationships where you felt loved and valued and safe. The problem now is that you learned to expect little from other people despite needing a lot and this attitude causes you to act in ways that continually recreate your negative experiences with people, further solidifying your belief that the world is a hostile place. Therapy provides a corrective experience where you can learn that not all people will treat you in the way that you expect and enables you to begin developing different expectations and behaviors that are more likely to allow you to better navigate the boundaries of closeness and distance in your relationships. Understanding where your behavior originated and how it served to protect you early on from overwhelming disappointment, and how it now serves to just re-create past negative experiences will enable you to make the necessary cognitive and behavioral changes you need to break the cycle.
Find a therapist who you can connect with and above all, when you begin to encounter difficulties in the therapeutic relationship, don't run from them, but stay in treatment and share what you are feeling and experiencing with the person-that is the basis of the corrective experience!

Answer 3

I think that your underlying thoughts are present in many people. I am very sceptical and apprehensive in my approach to other people and unless I know someone well, I will try to avoid being in a position where that person could do me harm.
The difference with you appears to be in the attitude that you present to others. I will shake hands, smile and be pleasant to someone who I regard as a potential threat while you appear to be unable to prevent your thoughts manifesting themselves as actions.
Count yourself lucky that you are not one of the many that have been condemned to a lifetime of medication but instead have the chance of a cure.
The solution to your problem is within you. Self control is often very difficult. A former colleague with a tendency to over react achieved self control by imagining the action he would like to take against others. This had a soothing effect on him and enabled him to continue with meetings, discussions etc.

Good luck.

Answer 4

Start going to yoga - or sum other practice that will help you to find your balance - physically, mentally and emotionally. 4get the medication - if u start now on medication now, you will always take it - i cld tell u that ive been of the same mind as you - but it affected me with different issues so it wldnt help you much to hear all of my mental troubles.

It may help u to know that i did overcome them, and i am back in my own shoes. Wether its society, family, relationships, drugs, whatever it is that starts the way we think to go wonky, doesnt really matter - the fact is sum of us go wonky. There r a million cures n explanations but the 1 that worked for me n does for most is to find our natural balance - yoga will do that - so will kinnesiology - mayb tai chi - you need to look in that kind of direction.

The reason u have fallen so far within your own thought is bcos u r sensitive n cant take what life has had to offer you - so u lock yourself away - i did it for many years, but it only started to get better when i did sumthin about it. NO medication - TAKE A CHANCE and try to heal yourself -- if u dnt like that way u r now - change it.

It was one of the hardest things i ever did, but that was a long time ago now , reading your Q has brought bk a lot of memories, and i know that whatever any1 says u will find a way find fault in it - so all i will say is that Yoga - kinnesiology n tai chi helped me to find my balance - so the choice is yours, either or all of these things will help you. No1 is against u, but if u give sum1 the chance they will try to pull u around - just to empower themselves - fight for your peace of mind -

Its a logical process - you dont really wanto spend the rest of your life as evrybodys plaything do you ? bored, sick and uncaring people like to wind slightly unstable people up and watch em go - dnt b any1's plaything - get quiet - n balance yourself. Good Luk * *

Answer 5

I have recntly noticed that I'm also very defensive & untrusting & I used to get really paranoid. But now I'm learning to be softer, be more patient & treat people with kindness. I was soooo hostile & angry & was always suspicious of people etc(I still am sometimes) but I am learning to be more tolerant & accept that if I give out bad vibes people respond with similiar behaviour.
just the fact that you've noticed these things means you're healing from them, so just release the feelings to God & ask & pray for Him to heal you from these feelings. Don't take medication unless you feel you're really losing control & don't panick & blame yourslef too much, we all have bad feelings but it's good that you noticed them which means you're in control of these feelings;otherwise they'd take over you.
I'd ask for some help & support if u are feeling agoraphobic but you don't need to hang to all these bad feelings. I feel you're bombardingurslef with unnecessary negativity, think more positive & pray to God for help, I promise you He won't let you down & you'll find someone somewhere will help.
Don't be so hard on yourslef please, love yourself as you are a child of God like all of us!
Also do some simple breathing exercises; sit comfortably or lie down, (put on some relaxing music)take a few deep breaths & just concentrate on your breath coming in & going out. Then keep repeating in your mind (or loudly but not too loudly) I am calm. Also take deep breaths througout the day every few hours or henever u remember, this is especially helpful.
& give up bad thoughts! If you have a abd thought, replace it with "I love myself & all is well".
I also put a link for a wonderful book which I thought will really help you if you read it carefully & out in the mental effort.
PS> don't get carried away by the doctors labelling, it's how u feel which is important.
Hope you feel better soon,& don't worry, be happy! everything will be ok, I promise.
lots of luvxxxx

PS> please feel free to email me if you need someone to talk to. a listening ear!

Answer 6

because you have a personality disorder and it is all about seeking attention which is what you are doing now thees feeling are all in your head stop feeding them by craving and receiving attention.you can make the choice now you don't always have to do negative thing for attention you can do allot more positive things which for everyone works out better, you choose your path in how your life will go but i can tell you people eventually tire from friends and family that make them feel exhausted

Answer 7

I am suprised that they do not want to medicate you. Something to take the edge off, help blunt the rage. I have some of the same problems you do, it flares up from time to time and medication has helped, but it is not a cureall.

Answer 8

People have so much to worry about with their own selves, that you should not be paranoid. Get a new way of thinking. Read the word of God. (Bible)

Thinking of others more than self can help.

Answer 9

I'm sorry to ask this but do the 'northern lights' have anything to do with it , I'd cut down a bit if I was you .

Answer 10

You need treatment.