My girlfriend's parents like me as far as I know. My girlfriend and I have known each other for almost 7 years and have been on and off. We are both ready to marry each other and I am not particularly close to her parents. I would feel weird asking them since we don't have that kind of relationship. The most we talk is a "Hi, how are you doing?" When I see them, which is not very often as of now. I know she wants me to ask them, but I feel like It's just asking too much from me. It may sound rude, but it is ultimately her decision, even though I care what her parents think of me. I don't know how this would affect the engagement process either. I'm confused.
2007-03-05 20:27:21 · 18 answers · asked by munkman82 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
You may not know them you may not like them much but they did bring your prospective wife up and helped give her those qualities you have found in her it is little enough to simply say to them that you and their daughter wish to have their good wishes on your marriage intentions. OK be a man .
2007-03-05 22:17:34 · answer #1 · answered by burning brightly 7 · 2⤊ 2⤋
I know it may seem like a hassle and unnecessary to ask her parents, but think of it...once you marry this girl, you're also marrying into her family. So why not start things off nice by being respectful and asking them for her hand.
So you won't feel weird, try doing it when she's not around.
Invite them to lunch or something and tell them how much you love their daughter and would love to make her your wife. I'm sure they'll appreciate it and maybe that'll break that ice you have with them and they'll see you more like a son from that point on.
2007-03-06 04:42:36 · answer #2 · answered by HaLF_BaKeD123 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Don't ask. Tell them together with your girlfriend if she says yes. You are right, it is ultimately her decision and skipping on the whole 'ask daddy' thing shows respect for her. I think that's a lot more manly and respectful than asking her parents. I find the whole asking the parents for permission before proposing is rude and just wreaks of a more depressing era where women were property and needed to be traded for and given away at weddings. I would have second doubts about a man who had to ask permission from my parents before asking me!!!
2007-03-06 07:25:30 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Do you and your girlfriend live together already? That can make a difference. I can tell you what my husband did, as we did live together at the time we decided to marry. When we were at my parents home for Thanksgiving, I (conveinently) went for a walk, and my husband showed my mom and dad the engagement ring, and his intention to ask me to marry him officially on Christmas, and asked for their blessing. My parents were touched by his respect, and told him it was about time! So, even though it really wasn't neccessary under the circumstances, it meant a lot to my parents.
2007-03-06 10:25:21 · answer #4 · answered by Lynny K 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's an old tradition for the man to ask the girl's father for her hand in marriage. This is a way for the man and the gilr's dad to sit down and have a man to man talk. Get to know each other better. Yes, it is up to you and your lady, however, it is a way for the family to be a part of the whole thing, and get their blessing. Take care.
2007-03-06 06:35:09 · answer #5 · answered by SAK 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Your girlfriend must have a very close or tight relationship with her parents. If you really love her, you should show it to her by meeting her family and ask their permission to marry her. It is a very special day in her life and would like to share it with her family too, not only friends. She will love and respect you more.
2007-03-06 04:55:53 · answer #6 · answered by s_leopando 1 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Why? Why Not?? Be the MAN you claim to be!
After 7 years you haven't figured out that when you marry the daughter you marry the family. Please!!!
Maybe the best thing that could happen is for the two of you NOT to get married!
I would really think long and hard about this!
Remember "A Husband is to LOVE his Wife as Christ LOVED the Church"
Remember -- Christ DIED for that Church!!!
2007-03-06 04:54:32 · answer #7 · answered by s7lmb 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
It's just a courtesy - a really, really nice thing to do. You are not really asking permission, it's more for a blessing - a stamp of approval, if you will. After so long, I can't believe you don't know them better! Hopefully they feel they know you....
You would go see the parents before you ask her to marry you.
2007-03-06 10:52:35 · answer #8 · answered by Lydia 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Too much to ask? You're about to marry into this family so whether you like it or not many conversations will arise! Most parents expect the guy to ask as a sign of respect. If you love her then just do this for her.... it takes the risk out of someone objecting at the altar!
2007-03-06 04:32:59 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 2⤋
I was tickled pink when I heard my fiance asked my dads permission to ask me to marry him.
Also, you said she wants you to ask them. That would be another bonus, that I'm sure she'll be thrilled with.
And you might score brownie points with her dad.
Although, you should make it sound like you are asking permission, but you really are only asking for his blessing/approval. If he says "no", respectfully mention you will be asking her anyway and only hope that he can approve.
2007-03-06 13:48:47 · answer #10 · answered by Terri 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋