I keep catching myself saying "NO" to my 2 1/2 yr old over petty things?

Question

I've read and also been told that "NO" should be used rarely because they can become desensitized to it. NO should be used when they are in danger of hurting themselves. When he grabs the cordless phone i should encourage him to play with something else, but find myself saying "NO". I have noticed NO is not having the same effect, and its not taken seriously. I worry about him running out in the street and me yelling NO and it doesn't stop him. How do you keep yourself from reverting to the "NO" being over used?

Answer 1

Awareness that you need to change the "no" response is the beginning of improving it. Actively think of other ways to deal with your son when he picks up something that you'd rater he didn't. The best thing is to "re-direct' his attention to something interesting, new and OK for him! Of course, in real life that doesn't happen without a lot of planning. Make sure you know where favorite toys are and say, "Get xxx, let's play with xxx". It makes you more interesting to pay attention to when you know good stuff to do.

Kids are born knowing how to keep you honest. You can't play them easily without their catching on and ignoring you. I see little ones in stores with their moms. The moms are saying "no" louder and ore harshly and obviously that is the thing they say most to their child and the kid pays no attention. Kids are born to learn about everything. Saying "no"and taking things away doesn't teach a darn thing. It makes for frustration on both sides. Explaining about a phone or TV control or whatever thing, and showing how to be gentle and respectful of things is what kids need to see. He is not setting out to be "bad". he wants to learn and play. Have fun with him. Try to see things anew through his eyes!

Answer 2

First ALL parents say no to their kids. I do think whoever told you to offer alternatives was smart. Saying, keep your hands off, or put that down, often will work better than saying no. I've trained my kids to respond to "stop" when it is a danger situation. Some parents use "freeze" in that type of situation. Those are words you don't use as often, so they can be specifically identified with danger. I generally try to phrase thing in a proactive form than a negative form. For example, instead of saying, "no don't touch the stereo." I'd say, "Take your hands off the stereo" Rather than grabbing the remote, and saying "no", hand them a toy and say, "here's a better choice". Instead of saying, "no running" I say, "walk please". These are just suggestions. It sounds like you're already working on it. It's very common for children not to respond to no. In fact, some have suggested that when you say, "Don't something" that the child can hear "do something" (fill in the appropriate word for "something"). I know that in my own children, that saying NO is still necessary. It just is... No hitting. No yelling at mommy. No standing in your chair. I try the other things, but sometimes, eh... that's the way it goes. I am sure your doing the best you can do, or you wouldn't even worry about it. Take care. Oh, one more thing... If I find I am saying NO a lot during a day. I give myself a mommy time out. I put in a video and go in the bathroom and count to 100 (and I PRAY). Then I can come back out with a better perspective.

Answer 3

It's common and hard to stop. I find that instead of saying "no" at that age, just removing him from the situation or the object from him works better than no. Say he's reaching for a breakable, you pick him up and divert his attention to something else. Also, remove a lot of the "nos" from your life to begin with. Like all the breakables, expensive items. Most of what he can reach should not be a no. Move the cordless phone. It's much easier than battleing. People who say you must keep those items around and teach your child to leave them alone must not have very bright kids I'm thinking.

Answer 4

here is my opinion, in line with evaluating Scripture with Scripture and likewise from analyzing numerous books on the project. a million, Paul wrote a million Thessalonians somewhat early, in all probability 5-10 years till now the Corinthian letters. In a million Thessalonians, the context of financial disaster 4 is the believing lifeless whose bodies "slept" interior the floor. What Paul wrote in a million Thessalonians 4:sixteen is somewhat perfect--whilst Jesus returns, interior the air, for His saints, the lifeless will upward thrust first, and, in accordance to the subsequent verse, we who're alive and final will connect them, and so that they can be with the Lord perpetually. Did you examine the subsequent numerous verses, or the excellent context? 2. Now in 2 Corinthians 5, Paul is discussing the guy believer and what happens whilst a believer dies. The believer is going to be with the Lord. back, i'm specific you observed the verse that stated if Paul replaced into absent from the Lord, he replaced into interior the physique, etc. So there's no contradiction, those verses mirror 2 diverse sides of a believer's demise, could desire to a believer die till now the Rapture. The physique is going into the floor and the soul/spirit is going to be with the Lord. whilst the Rapture comes, the physique is raised, and joined to the soul and spirit, and is going to Heaven.

Answer 5

i know what you mean! this is NO LIE, my daughter's first word was not "ma ma ma" or "da da da" it was "bad bad bad". i have three boys that are older... and apparently i said "bad" A LOT.

my daughter also use to say "hot" for everything that could hurt a person... because apparently i would tell her something was hot and then she learned to use caution...

i don't really think that saying "no" is improper... i would just follow up the word with an action if your child is not paying attention when you say it. put him in "time out" for not hearing you. when i would use time out (and i still do even on my 17 year old) it means that we set down and talk about what ever it was that he has done that i didn't like... we always have time-out in his bedroom so no one else hears AND it's a place he's comfortable with and will not end up having negative feelings about... (how could he, everything he cherishes is in there!)

good luck :)

Answer 6

You are a good parent for recognizing that strategy, and wanting to change a bad habit. I think most parents struggle with the NO. Many more of them don't realize that it is counter productive.

You've just got to replace your bad habit with a better one.
I struggled with saying NO as a Kindergarten teacher. When I taught, I made myself say the child's name before any disciplinary words. That gave me time to choose my words instead of speaking in haste. I really just takes recognition and practice.

You are on the right track!

Answer 7

I say "uht uh" to my son and did the same with my older child. I only use the word no when its a big time problem. he knows when I say no it means something is really really important for him to stop.

I just did it on my own b/c I think no is such a negative word and if you cna do one thing for your kids, then you have to give them self worth.

Answer 8

The best thing to do is catch yourself while you're doing it.
Always be aware of someone saying No and you saying No.
And if No isn't working for your son, then try using another phrase, Like No(insert name) when he is doing absolutely something dangerous. Or "Do Not" Or something similar.
Good luck :)

Answer 9

When I don't say NO, I say "We don't do that...becasue......." My son's probably too young to understand the rational that I'm using (only 16 mos), but he seems to get the just of what I'm saying. I don't really monitor what I say NO to, as I belive children need to hear it, but I do try to use different terminologies, so that NO isn't the only thing he's hearing.

Answer 10

Tell him "You're not supposed to play with the phone" or "Don't play with the phone" You're not saying no and it has the same effect.