My therapist wants me to write a letter to my mom (shes dead) as a way of grieving... What should I write?

Question

My mom died almost 7 years ago, when I was 15. I am still grieving.

Answer 1

any sort of depression can be tide over by faith in GOD and sincere prayer.

Your prayer is from your heart. Further You must have to understood the fact that God is present in our heart. This can be realised in meditation. Further we are the creation of our own destiny. As per Hindu sacred religion, we carry all good and bad deeds life after life. There is no end unless we pray for unification of self with the divineliness.
Hence there is always a possible way to complete mergence with God in this life by a simple and wonderful meditation

Answer 2

I'm very sorry to hear that , perhaps just write down things you wished you had , had a chance to say in life when she was here with you and didn't get the opportunity. Tell her the little things she did for you didn't go unnoticed and you love her for them all . And remember dear as we grow older we realize just how short are time is here on earth , but just imagine eternity in heaven and what it must be like . To your mother in heaven it will seem as if you never parted for she'll only need turn around and you will be together again . May god bless you and keep you and send you the message that it's time to move on dear , I'm sure your mom loved you very much and would have wanted it that way .

Answer 3

Wow I had to do the same exact thing when my mom past away when i was 15 and Im still grieving also. In your letter explain how much you miss her,what's been going on in your life,the good times youve had with her and what u miss most about her.It does help a lot and over the years youll see it I promise you.Take Care

Answer 4

I think it is a great idea. Just start writing it as if your mother was sitting right there with you now... what would you say to her?? What questions would you ask?? Is there something you've always wished you would/could have said to her while she was still alive?? Tell her now. I THINK YOU WILL BE AMAZED AT THE CONVERSATION YOU COULD HAVE WITH HER THROUGH THIS LETTER. oops...caps lock...lol..sorry...Go ahead girl get a pen and paper and head to a quiet place and have a long talk with mom...I bet she misses you too. God bless you sweetie!! May you pain turn into hope!!

Answer 5

First of all, I am so sorry for your loss. I cannot imagine losing my mom now when i need her most (I am 15) though I am scared she will die with the cancer she has now threatening her life...okay sorry, back to you, you don't need to hear my life's story,

the whole point of your therapist telling you to write that is to help you grieve, and I'm sure going on Yahoo! Answers asking people what to write is not what he/she had in mind. No one here cna tell you what to write because no one here is in your body feeling what you're feeling, going through what you're going throuhg. just wite how you feel about her and her death. Tell her how much you love and miss her. Tell he what's in your heart. Once again, sorry for your loss and I wish you the best in your time of grief (okay that sounded totally cheesy, but you know what i meant right?)

Answer 6

Write to your mom as if you really had one more chance to talk to her. Tell her about your life now and your grief after her death. Tell her how much you love her. Just start writing as if you had this one chance and it will come easily.

I was much older than you when I lost my mother and it was still very, very hard. I am so sorry this happened to you at such a young age.

Answer 7

I have written many letters to people that I never sent them to in a way to vent or grieve. Your therapist is wise.

Just start out writting like you are talking to her. Imagine in your mind that she is sitting across the room in a chair. Please feel free to say whatever you want to say. You can even tell her that you are angry that she died. Just start writting.........
examples ........
when you died I felt................

when you didn't come back I was sad because.......

I need you now becasue..............

I feel like you and I missed out on...............

Why did you leave me when I was so..........

Now when I think about you I feel...........

what I want you to know about me now.................

What I remember most about you is.........

What I remember about your personality is........

The way I am like you is.............

I feel lost and hurt when..........

I miss you the most when.........

I cry the most when.........

I am still grieving because..........


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Hon, I lost my dad & I have lost a son. I don't think I will ever be the same. But, I am still alive and I know they would want me to be happy. I also know that they know that I need to grieve.

I hope this helps.

Answer 8

Write from your heart. No one even has to see the letter... but to get it out an on paper can be such a help.

Answer 9

talk about all the good times... the most positive memories. things that you think she might have forgotten about. about making cookies, wrapping gifts for christmas, that's it's ok to cry when you found out the boy didn't like you back, when she took you and your friends to the movies, to the school dance, when you were a kid and you put on her make-up, when it was just the two of you running errands all day... things like that.

hope this helps

Answer 10

First of all, let me tell you how very sorry I am for your loss. It clearly still affects the ways that you feel, what you do. It must still really hurt you. I cannot imagine anyone here telling you what to write, because only you had that special relationship with her. In my own practice as a therapist, I have often asked people to write "unsent" letters for the purpose of motivating people to really get in touch with all of their feelings about the other person. You need not limit the letter to writing about how much you miss her and what you shared with her when she was alive. It is very important for you to try to get in touch with and to share all of your feelings about losing her. Even the feelings of anger and betrayal, the ones that we "don't like", that feel really negative are helpful to allow yourself to express. Certainly your relationship with her was not perfect, though through time we tend to idealize the person that we have lost. For example, my dad died when I was young from a heart attack, he was my "hero", my mentor. For a while, I felt pretty angry with him that he "left me"; I felt abandoned by him. It was difficult to admit feelings such as that, but when I got them out, I was able to put the relationship in a whole different perspective, to remember the "bad" times as well as the good times--and to sort of let go with love of a lot of my grief for him. I also felt a lot of guilt that I had given him a hard time sometimes, and was able to apologize to him for that. And most of all, to tell him how very, very much that I loved him.

What I'm saying is that, as difficult as it may be to acknowledge them, when we lose someone that we love, we have a variety of feelings. Some of them are easy to talk about, others are more difficult to admit. Writing a letter to your mom can be a good start for you to put the entire relationship in perspective and to move on with your process of grieving. Only you can possibly know all the feelings, all the things that you would like to be able to tell her about your life now, to make amends for things left undone--all of it, even the parts that may feel "scary" to aknowledge and to see written down on paper. You must have the inner strength to be able to look at all of that because your therapist knows you well and asked you to do it. If you have a lot of difficulty doing it and can't get it done by your next therapy session, you can always talk with the therapist about how very difficult it is for you to begin the letter. Perhaps your therapist can give you some ideas about how to start to reach all the feelings that you must have to be still grieving for such a long time after her death. There is no set time that it takes to heal the grief, and it takes longer for some people than for others. But it can be done! My father's death (and working through it) motivated me to change careers and become a psychologist, and now, I know that he would be proud of me.

Saying "good luck" feels trite here, so I'll say that I'm sending you a lot of compassion and caring. And the assurance that you can resolve your grief and move on with your life with a lot of love.