he said he is jealous that mom is happy and content with her life but he wishes he can be the same and i try to say positive things to him and he doesn't listen... won't take any depression meds or go to counseling or nothing... i want him to be happy and i want to be happy because he is happy...
2007-03-05 13:47:28 · 9 answers · asked by katherinekimbrough 3 in Health ➔ Mental Health
wow thanks
but he doesn't have any grandkids...yet
2007-03-05 14:16:59 · update #1
Have you tried telling your dad how his behavior affects you? Often people who won't get treatment for themselves will reconsider when they realize how much pain their behavior causes to those that they love.
You do need to take care of yourself and maintain some distance though as you cannot be responsible for treating or taking care of your dad. I do hope that you will talk with your Mom and get some support from her as I'm sure she can understand what you are going through.
2007-03-05 13:55:16 · answer #1 · answered by Opester 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Tell him he should give counseling a try it might help him. If you want to be happy you should give it a try it might help. Ask him why he's not happy and what can he do to change it. What does he want out of life. And maybe you and your mom can help him get what he wants. Or just be there to listen. He's an adult and you can help him if he doesn't want it. My dad and I are both depressed and he always brings me down. Nothing helps with him. I finally realized that I need to save myself. I was staying at home for him and he was bringing me down. Its sad but I realized I'm not him mom and I have my own problems to deal with. I know it sounds harsh but you don't know the stuff that happened. I tried and tried. You could talk to other family members and have them talk to your dad. Don't put him before you it makes things worse trust me.
2007-03-05 14:06:44 · answer #2 · answered by Ange 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sounds like you and dad need to take a little trip together. Go camping, or do whatever. But the key is get him away from the situation and you 2 need to just chill and talk. Have fun, it will be up to you, you have to be strong, and lead the way. But don't tell him how you feel about mom, just listen to him and by all means love him. I found that has been the best cure. It works.
2007-03-05 14:01:26 · answer #3 · answered by smittybo20 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is so nice that you care so deeply for your father. The thing is though, he has to decide to go to treatment or take medications
for his depression. This is not what you want to hear I'm sure but is the truth. Suggest to him going to the doctor and then you have to let it go because it will not help you or your father for you to be unhappy. None of us have any control of what another person chooses to do, maybe he is not ready yet to go for help. That doesn't mean he will never go for help. In the meantime love him with all your heart but live your life too.
2007-03-05 14:04:24 · answer #4 · answered by phylobri 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Those who are close to a depressed person often struggle with their own feelings toward the person. Feelings of concern, frustration, and fear combined with futile efforts to make things better can lead to stronger feelings of anger, helplessness, despair, resentment, and guilt. Please know that these feelings are very normal. No one can make another person get help for depression, and no one can take away another person's depression. Just remember never give up hope and look after yourself.
He will with understanding and support find a way to get help, you just have to make sure you are ready for it when he is.
2007-03-05 14:03:22 · answer #5 · answered by citalopraming 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Get him involved in something. Bowling league; poker game with buddies; grandchildren??? Does he have any hobby? Build on it and if he doesn't help him find one. There must be something that will distract his thoughts. Was he ever in the war? Ask him to start a journal to pass on to future generations. Writing is a powerful stress reliever. You just need to get him to re-focus.
2007-03-05 13:56:02 · answer #6 · answered by Mickey 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He needs to go to counseling and be on medication. That or extremely strong willpower. You have to do the best to not let it get you down. Rise above it.
2007-03-05 14:09:28 · answer #7 · answered by boysxlie 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
"Life is not a matter of holding good cards, but of playing a poor hand well."
-Robert Louis Stevenson
2007-03-05 13:57:10 · answer #8 · answered by kalpon777 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Buy him a dog.
2007-03-05 13:56:10 · answer #9 · answered by Rockford 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋