way to embarrased to tell anyone and need some serious help dont mess with me on this?

Question

honestly im a 15 year old girl whos still getting spanked. what the hell is this. iv asked to be grounded but my uncle((who i live with)) "prefers" to be old school. how do i get him to stop. it got so bad i literaly have marks on my *** from a belt? my friend told me that its got to stop and that the way he does it is messing with my head cause normaly he wont stop till i cry. ive done everything to avoid trouble. but he cant keep me from going out and having a boyfriend. i want to have some kind of life. besides that i follow the rules or at least i try. i would tell the police but im so humilated by it if they find out who i am and whats happening il never want to leave my house ever again.

Answer 1

~ emma b... Outch....

~ If you are a church going Christian, I would advise you to speek to your Pastor's wife on this topic...

~ If the 'uncle' is a Christian, he should be using forgiveness, not physical punishment...
Where is Mom? Where is Dad? If not in the picture, you need to speak to your religious priest or pastor ... He may need anger management classes... may not even be qualified in the eyes of the law to be your legal guardian.

~ Otherwise, 911... Keep reporting it... once the police answer the call, I would expect a MAJOR change in 'uncle's' attitude... you'll still be punished (no doubt) for your disobident nature, but if no reason for punishment... 911...

1Jo 5:2 By this we know that we love the children of God, when we love God, and keep his commandments.

~ ... sure... there will be those who tell you that you should be thankful that you are not living in the Old Testament times, least you be stoned to death for being disobidient... whew... God forbid...

Answer 2

You're being abused, and there are laws against that. Your uncle is a criminal, and should be in jail. At the age of 15 you are well past the age to be "spanked." Call the police NOW. There is nothing to say his "old school" thinking won't graduate into something more bizarre. You're the victim here, and it has to stop. If anyone needs to be embarrassed about it, it's your uncle. Get on the phone, before he does something worse. The judicial system will take care of you, trust me. The police have seen this sort of thing a lot. You have nothing to be ashamed of.

Answer 3

You must understand that as long as you're living in his house, you need to follow his rules. If that means no boyfriends or staying out late, you do it. You're very young and you've got plenty of time for boys when you're 18 and can go to college or get a roommate. For the time being, because he's your guardian and you're a minor--a child--just listen to him.

On the other hand, the spanking is probably uncalled for. Talk to him personally. Tell him that you want to have a social life (movies, mall, etc.) and not get spanked. But also tell him that you understand and respect his rules about boys and staying out late. If that doesn't work have a family member talk to him--aunt, grandma, sister, etc. Third parties can usually talk some sense into people.

But realize that you are only 15 and you need to listen to your uncle. If you do, I think your relationship to him will get better.

Answer 4

You need to tell someone. I know it's hard, but try to find someone that you do feel comfortable talking with. First of all, you need to understand, you aren't being "spanked". Don't call it that, and it won't seem so embarrassing. You are being beaten--with a belt. That is abuse. Go to your school nurse, or your guidance counselor, and tell them about it. If you have marks, you can move your pants down on the side just enough to show the marks to the nurse. You don't need to show anyone you are uncomfortable with. Please do this, and don't be embarrassed. You aren't doing anything wrong. He should be the one who's embarrassed. Not only is this physical abuse, but it also smacks of sexual abuse. (A grown man beating a 15-year old girl on the tush with a belt...) Good luck, hon.

Answer 5

My dad did this to me. Im 31 now. Here is my advise:
Tell your uncle, that you are way too old to be getting spankings, and that it feels very violating. Does he know he is leaving marks?
Tell him. Sounds like he has an anger problem, and feels out of ideas, on other methods of discipline. Look, you have to abide by his rules. If you want him to think of a more appropriate method of discipline, then why dont you tell him what other parents do, for kids your age. I have a 14 year old. I ground her. I take her ipod, I lecture her. But ultimately, at14,I have hope that she is smart enough, to not do stupid things. And if she does, she will have to live with the consequences. Which include dealing with me. I ended up running away. I wouldnt recommend this. I ended up on drugs,then pregnant and with no where to live. I missed out on highschool,and prom, and my childhood. Just talk to him. Tell him seriously how this is hurting you. Tell him you are NOT going to let him touch your butt(haha but it'll scare him)ok, and if he still insists on corporal punishment you have got to either toughen up or tell someone. You aren't the only one who got their butt whooped at 15...it's been around along time......I also agree with Chris R

Answer 6

You have asked this question 3 times.

Start with getting help through a school counselor.

But you are ONLY 15 and he CAN keep you grounded from going out and partying and having a boyfriend. Don't know if you are rebellious and wild. Don't know both sides of the story.

Do not like the idea of the belt.

Answer 7

You need to tell the authorities because I think it is a perverted thing. A grown man does not need to spank a 15 year old girl, especially with a belt. You are being abused.

Answer 8

Emma,
If you talk to a guidance counselor then He/She will contact children's services and the police. They must do so. You will then be speaking with them about it whether you want to or not. I am not sure what you want to do but I think you should discuss it with your uncle and let him know that at your age it should stop NOW! I agree that he should find some other form of punishment for minor infractions and save that for a major infraction. Have a great evening.
Eds

Answer 9

Babe just talk to a teacher or someone at your school like a guidance conselor. They'll deal with this in a candid (quiet) manner, and definitely know what to do. You've taken a brave step though, it's hard to admit something like this even over the internet. That's very impressive. Don't stop here.

Answer 10

I would tell your counselor at school even if it's only a guidance counselor, my dad once spanked me when I was 12 and I thought that was the worst, I would've rather been grounded for a year, but definitely he needs to be stopped and I'm sure it will be kept confidential but even if it did come out he'd be the only one looking like a jerk. Hang in there and please talk to your counselor or if thats not doable, talk to an officer. .

Answer 11

I was not allowed to date until I was 16. And I was spanked in addition to being grounded until I was 16. Why can't you obey the rules of no dating or having a boyfriend? Sounds like a touch of rebellion on your part to me. Dating is not the definition of "having a life." Try doing it your uncles way and stop rebelling. Ask your uncle if you can go out with your Church group with adult supervision. There's still alot you have to learn about "life" and your uncle knows this. He is just trying to protect you from yourself. 15 year olds don't have alot of sense in general - driven by hormones usually and emotions and don't stop to think. Been there, done that. Take my advice and listen to your uncle. You will have far less regrets later down the road.