I really was in love with this girl. I thought she was my ONE. But she kept getting mad at me over petty things and kept trying to change me? I would have done anything for her and I have changed several times before to please her, but I just couldn't change anymore. I would have had to change who I was. Now she wants to be just friends, anything less than her lover I just won't accept. I can't just Have half of her. What do I do?
2007-03-05 12:19:52 · 21 answers · asked by rzacg 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Thats what hurts the most. I still love her dearly. And I put so much work into this relationship. To have everything you worked for collapse on top of you is spirit breaking. I want to move on, but I'm just gonna be scared to trust someone with my heart. The person I trusted the most broke it.......
2007-03-05 12:34:56 · update #1
sorry to hear you've just broken up with someone you really loved, i know it's really hard.
maybe try and give her some space for a while, as hard as it may be, so perhaps don't get in contact with her to give both you and her some breathing space or if she contacts you ask for some space-it may just save your sanity!
as it was her who kept trying to change you, time apart may also make her realise just what a great catch you are and she may come back to you and accept you for the great person you are, without you having to change.
as the saying goes "If you love somebody, let them go. If they return, they were always yours. If they don't, they never were."
as hard as this may be, it helped me in my break up. you deserve someone who truly appreciates you for who you are and if they don't, as much as you love them, you will find somebody in the future who loves you for you.
in terms of the friend situation-i think it would be difficult to be friends with this person at the moment but maybe after a length of time apart and you feel over her and feel as though you can be her friend, do. but if it's too hard for you, then don't have her in your life anymore.
talk to your friends, keep busy and remember your ex wasn't perfect and if she didn't appreciate the unique and wonderful person you are then in the future you will meet someone who will. the one would never try to change you, they would accept you for who you are.
i know things are really hard at the moment and it's such a cliche but time really is the greatest healer and you will get over her.
these links may be useful:
http://www.ivillage.co.uk/relationships/understanding/thinking/articles/0,,142_698944,00.html
http://www.ivillage.co.uk/relationships/couple/split/articles/0,,142_158020,00.html
also, if it helps email a professional organisation such as the samaritans to work through your feelings- jo@samaritans.org
i found this especially useful after the break up of a long term relationship.
hope this helps, good luck!
2007-03-05 12:37:34 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes the chemistry just isn't right. The person that's the ONE should accept you for who you are. If you pretend to be someone you're not, you'll eventually get tired of playing that role and then you'll resent your girlfriend for making you do it. Ifyour ex doesn't accept you for who you are and she keeps trying to change you, then maybe she's just not the one. Trust me, when you do meet the ONE, you'll be so happy you didn't stay with your ex. As far as getting over her, only time can heal that wound. Concentrate on you for now. Living life, doing things that make you happy and be sociable (only when you're ready) and start dating again so you meet the future Mrs. Good luck!
2007-03-05 12:28:11 · answer #2 · answered by Butterfly 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
break it off completely its the only way you would get over it - you have to just not be around her or have any communication with her so that you can forget about it - as sad as it may seem to put that much time into something and not have it work out - but these things happen and better things will come your way, when you least expect it. Hang in there - surround yourself with friends and family and enjoy the single life while you can
2007-03-05 12:23:41 · answer #3 · answered by absolut_nixter 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
properly, say you do smash up together with her than later locate out this new lady does not decide for something greater desirable than you may hazard your love for no longer something. Or later down the line you recognize you made a extensive mistake and could't get her back. each and every person has their united statesand downs. No, courting is ideal. you may desire to artwork nevertheless it to make it artwork. If its meant to be if its no longer than its no longer. perhaps you may desire to take time different than for the two woman's and basically be by skill of your self and spot who you will discover your self with. who's been there with you for each little thing. Which lady will on no account do you any incorrect. Weigh out your thoughts in the previous you're making your determination. I knew this couple who been mutually for the reason that they have been 14 and that they are 30 now. they are nevertheless mutually. the girl thought approximately breaking apart till she found out that she could no longer see herself with absolutely everyone yet him. that they had alot of fights too. basically have an afternoon to your self and variety all of it out and basically think of roughly each and everything and who you are able to have confidence. the midsection needs what the midsection needs. examine your different submit additionally so I blended the two solutions mutually.
2016-09-30 06:15:35 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its very hard for anyone to adjust to losing someone they care about. The best way to help yourself is to keep busy. Get involved with activities you enjoy. Eventually you may meet someone you really have common interests with. Just be yourself. If someone cant accept the person you are they really dont have the feelings for you that you would like. No one can please everyone all the time. The one you have to live with every day is yourself. Take care of your needs first. Dont be mean, controlling or self centered...just dont neglect yourself by trying to be someone you are not. You have lots of time ahead. Enjoy it.
2007-03-05 12:30:41 · answer #5 · answered by katlady 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I were u I would sever all ties because if you cant be just friends you always be wanting something she doesn't. You should have to change who you are for someone. Trust me there are plenty other girls out there and one of them has to be the one!
2007-03-05 12:23:50 · answer #6 · answered by rainakafreak_egirl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK calm down! Heres the deal, girls have saying, theres nothing like dick to get over dick. damn sure it works the say way for men, so go get some tiger , you won't want to at first but once you do, you wont regret it, unless you dont wrap your pecker before ya decker that is!!!!! If that doesnt work treat her like ****, she will come running back to you! women always go for the bad boy, why? they are a challenge---you need to blow her off and make her come to you, in the mean time go get some and hope she hears about it! dont jump back in if she does come back to ya, shes there because you FINALLY left her alone!
2007-03-05 12:27:13 · answer #7 · answered by jewels 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Start doing fun things with your friends and enjoy being single! Have so much fun that you start to wonder why you ever wanted a girlfriend.
2007-03-05 12:22:52 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know what you have to do. Not talk to her. If you still love her, you can't be her friend, and you'll never heal. You need to let go 100% if you really want it to be over.
2007-03-05 12:22:45 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think the only way you can ever get over her, is to go out with your friends and mingle. No matter how hard it might be, you may never actually get over her. Try your hardest and good luck
2007-03-05 12:23:50 · answer #10 · answered by >Jaymee< 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋