I have been seeing this guy for almost a year now, and we have been in the same place in are relationship for months, and he says he loves me but he has been hurt in the past and wants to take things slow. I understand this, but right now I have the need to move the relationship on, I don't want to be selfish, I just don't want to stay with him for five years in "limbo" just to have him wake-up oneday and realize he doesn't want to be with me, that is a waste of both are times. So should I cut ties and bid him farewell, and say we are at two different points in are life, or stick around and see what happens? My biggest fear is that if I end it I will never know if it would have ever worked out, and I will have to live with that regret the rest of my life.
2007-03-05 11:39:11 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Let me say this, I am maddly in love with him that is why in a way I am offended that he doesn't want to seem to move forward. I have tested his commitment to me as awful as it sounds I have tried breaking it off with him in the past, and he always gets me back, he is so charming at times. He has told me he cannot love like he has loved in the past and that puts a hole in my heart, I feel like I could rip into a million pieces when he says that. I think of it like this if he doesn't love me to the extreme by now then he will never really love me at all. And to be honest I am so jealous of the "girl" in his past, it makes me feel awful that I couldn't have been there before her, I feel like I'm there to put the pieces back together, and they just don't fit I feel like a complete faluire. Oh and I feel like I should be 40 but I'm only 20, yes young, stupid,and naiive but I know what I want, my problem is going about the means of getting it.
2007-03-05 12:23:20 · update #1
My opinion (and you will not like it but you asked).. How old are you? How many guys have you dated? I think you are young and perhaps don't know what you want. You do not even mention the word "love". You say you want to move forward. I think you should move on--maybe come back at a later time. Maybe later you would each know if there is a future for the two of you. (But not now) No disrespect intended, please. Just gut instinct.
2007-03-05 12:06:37 · answer #1 · answered by old_woman_84 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is tough. stick with him for a while longer. he may need some more time to love again. but yet he needs to move on with his life. he already has someone who is there for him it's not like he's alone anymore. and you can't be in a state of "limbo" for to long either. like i said B 4 give it a little more time and if you feel it's not working out then give him a heads up and if he doesn't react then do what you must.....
2007-03-05 19:46:55 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He cant hold u responsible for his past,and if he does,why would u want him anyhow? u will live wit what happened to him for the rest of your life,is u all pursue something further.My advice is to talk to him,be straight up with him,and let him know he needs to make a decision,and suck up the issues with his past,depending on what he says,then should determine your decision,dont wait around 4 a man 2 change! It wont happen!!!
2007-03-05 19:44:39 · answer #3 · answered by dawnella322 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Move where in your relationship?Marriage?Sex?Is he just a "friend"?If he isnt intimate in anyway, then he may just want an ear to bend, or he may be sacred to death of being hurt again,or hoping for sex without committment or he may be gay.
Tell him that you want him to take some time off from the relationship and when he is ready to handle a relationship, that if you are available you will give it thought.
2007-03-05 19:45:28 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you got to take the risk or else you will regret it for the rest of your life
hang on there he will snap out of it at some point and u will find out where are u going , meanwhile try to get him to understand that the both of you need to move on and that not all girls are like the one that hurt him
be nice to him
2007-03-05 19:46:29 · answer #5 · answered by angelgirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What I think you need to do is talk to him about it and tell him exactly what you said above!! If things dont change then maybe it would be a good idea to break things off!
2007-03-05 19:43:55 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stick around
2007-03-05 19:43:43 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sit him down and talk it out with him. After that you can then decide what you should do. If he doesn't want to lose you he will do something about it.
2007-03-05 19:44:14 · answer #8 · answered by golden tigress 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
keep mind
2007-03-05 19:42:45 · answer #9 · answered by keral 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋