My boyfriend and are seriously discussing marriage, though we haven't told our parents yet. If we do get married, I don't know how to balance everybody's desires when it comes to the wedding.
I've always dreamed about eloping to Vegas. I like the idea of it being just the two of us. He wants a "real" wedding, with friends and family present, a reception, etc. So does my mother. My father wants to walk me down the aisle, but he won't go to a reception that my mother is at (my mother went through a period where she was a very violent and dangerous alcoholic, and he shakes and freaks out when he sees her now). So my father wants us to have a small initial ceremony he can be at, and then have a big grand one for my mother's family.
So how do we do this? 3 weddings seems excessive. The Vegas thing means a lot to me, and it's the only one I really like, so I don't want to give that up. Any advice?
2007-03-05 11:25:05 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
This may sound strange, but invite your dad to vegas and have him walk you down the isle. Then throw a big party/reception for everyone else when you get home. You and your new hubby could even wear the dress and tux you two wore when you got married in vegas to make it more special for everyone.
And by the way... it is IMPOSSIBLE keeping everyone happy when planning a wedding. When I first started planning ours out I tried that too, and found impossible. Just worry about you and your finance. Others can work around you.
2007-03-05 11:29:45 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your wedding day, you should be able to have it the way you want it to be...... If only it were that simple though!! What you want comes first, but you can't completely ignore what you're family's wishes are either. You should talk to your parents and explain all this to them. Maybe they would be willing to compromise with something....
But here is my idea. Why can't you elope in Vegas, but still have your dad there to walk you down the aisle? Then you can have a big reception for your mom and boyfriend.
2007-03-05 12:48:39 · answer #2 · answered by College girl 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The first thing to remember is that you have to make yourself happy first. There is no reason at all that you can't do a 'real' wedding in Vegas. Some of the chapels there are really beautiful. You could have a destination wedding in Vegas, and then a smaller party/reception at home for those that don't want to travel. Talk with your future husband, and come up with something you are both happy with. If others don't like it, tough. You can't ever make everyone happy.
2007-03-06 02:02:14 · answer #3 · answered by leslie s 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Have a Vegas wedding then come home and have a commitment ceremony and a huge reception where your father can either come or go because he has to realize it is your day and you shouldn't have to choose between your parents. If he wants to pay for all of this then by all means go a head and have all 3 but don't go into debt trying to please all because in the end someone will still be unhappy.
2007-03-05 11:36:03 · answer #4 · answered by JELLE 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well it sounds to me like it would be better to elope. That solves the mother/father issue and you won't feel like you have to choose sides. The only problem now is that your boyfriend doesn't really want to do that. You should sit down and discuss this with your boyfriend and tell him that you feel that this is the easiest way to do things and that it's something you've always dreamed about anyway. Then, after you elope, perhaps you could have 2 receptions (1 with your mother and 1 with your father) and then they'll feel like they got to celebrate a little bit with you after all.
2007-03-05 11:36:16 · answer #5 · answered by jlg_jdf 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Simple. I have known people to have two weddings. Why dont you elope first and then have a second wedding the kind your bf wants. That way you get what you want and he gets what he wants. It wont be expensive to elope in vegas. Just check out wedding packages at resorts that are there. The Bellagio is nice. http://www.bellagio.com/pages/frameset_noflash.asp
2007-03-05 11:36:49 · answer #6 · answered by . 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You don't have to balance anybody's desires. Do what you and your b/f want. You two will have to decide what to go with. Maybe get married with friends & family and then go to Vegas for a honeymoon. Let your Dad walk you down the aisle. It'll break his heart not to.
2007-03-05 11:34:56 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
fly to vegas, have daddy walk you down the isle (this means the most to me, i'm eloping on a cruise wedding!) have the big ceremony you get back with your mom and his family, that way you get your wedding in vegas, and he and your mom gets what they want, dad gets to walk you down the isle, and i'm sure he'll understand and only hang around for the ceremony!!!
2007-03-06 03:43:43 · answer #8 · answered by hunkyscutie 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Have the vegas and then a big reception with your mom's family and groom's family and then a nice dinner celebration with your father's family.
2007-03-05 12:57:23 · answer #9 · answered by JLB 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Have the Vegas wedding if you can get your man to give up on HIS dreams and wishes. The two of you have a LOT of talking to do.
2007-03-05 13:17:03 · answer #10 · answered by Lydia 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋