Should I try to call again?

Question

I met this girl in a cafe on Saturday, and we had a great conversation for 30 minutes. She gave me her phone number at the end, but I made the stupid mistake of calling her the day after (on Sunday night). We had the usual chit-chat for 10 minutes on the phone. And when I mentioned maybe we should get together the following weekend, she told me it is too early to know if she is free and "we will probably talk again before then". Personally, I think I blew it. I called her on Sunday night, and now I really can't call her again until Wed or Thurs night - By that time it would be too late to set up a date for the weekend. And there is always the possibility that she decided she is just not that interested after our phone conversation on Sunday (She probably think I am too eager). Now, should I give it another shot and call her on Wed or Thurs night? Or should I chalk this one up as a learning experience (not to be so eager in the future) and move on?

Answer 1

First off? Reach back and choke that little self-doubt monkey prancing on your back. You're overthinking things and putting way too much emotional value into this.

Not to say you shouldn't have ANY emotional investment in this person; Far from it! But you don't want these budding attachments to tangle you up in a worry-wart fit of contradiction, double-checking, and self-doubt.

Monkey choked and dead? Good.

Time to refocus your goals: 'Friendship First' is your motto. Not only does this releave a lot of stress on both sides, but this will help you calmly relax and be yourself as you remove this poor girl from the giant emotional pedestal you've put her on.

Get on with the other things in your life for awhile. Focus on some things you've neglected. Hell, call your Mother.

When you FEEL comfortable calling, and when you HAVE time? Then try again. Don't rush it. Be casual. Be relaxed. Be friendly.

Don't be so quick to pass/fail yourself. By being less severe in your expectations and judgements, and by striving for 'Friendship First'? You might not get a flowing barrage of females knotched on your belt...but you'll at least have a chance for social practice and develop some solid friendships!

And that ALONE can increase your chances of nabbing your hearts desire.

Answer 2

Give it another chance. Trust me, more then likely she is just trying to play that "hard to get role". Don't worry about it......... The fact that you called sooner does not mean that you were eager. It just means that you were really interested. All girls think of situations differently. If she feels like your being to eager and she keeps shutting you down like that then move on. But, I would definately give it another chance. And remember, The girl did have a life before she meet you. For all you know maybe she was going to be busy. Give it another try and if it flops....... Then let it fly by. I hope that I helped you...... l8er

Answer 3

Call again on Wednesday and ask if you can make plans for the weekend. Personally, I try not to make plans too early in the week because I never know if I am going to be free, so I think Wednesday is just right.
When you are on the phone, be cool and calm. Let her know you are interested and be warm, friendly, open and funny, so that she will (hopefully) return your interest.

If she doesn't make a date, than make sure she has your number and tell her she is welcome to call you anytime to just chat or make plans when she is free. That way, you know she is aware of your interest and can call you if she decides to go out with you later.

Answer 4

No offense but I think the whole rule thing about when to call is B.S.!! I think we (both men a& women) get so worked up about when the perfect time to call that we blow it. Seriously, you may think that you blew it because it was already in your head that you called to early. Why not call her later in the week?? What have you got to lose?? On the plus side - if you feel stupid at least you never have to see the girl again =)

Answer 5

No, I think SHE blew it. Don't call her. Her statement that "it is too early to know if she is free" is about as rude as you can get. When someone answers like that, it is the same as saying "Lets see what other options come up before I commit to spending time with you". Don't call her and if you run into her again or she calls you and asks what happened, tell her that there were other people who weren't waiting for a "better option" before spending time with you, so you decided you'd rather be with them.

Answer 6

Man, you should stop thinking so much! lol....Just reading that wore me out. Did you talk like that on the phone? I think this. Calm down. Call her again for a little more "chit chat". Make her laugh. And then, ask her out again. Maybe not on a typical "date" night. How about coffee in the afternoon? If she said you will "talk again" then by all means...DO IT

Answer 7

I'd give her one more call. Maybe she just didn't know what was going on for the weekend. If she does the same thing, then I'd give this one up. She gave you the number so she wanted you to call. Think positive! Good luck! Hope she says yes!

Answer 8

Call her Wedneday and if she doesn't go along with the idea to make some definite future plans, look for someone else. It sounds like she's playing her cards to see what is the best option this coming weekend.

Answer 9

Call her on Wed or Thurs. By then you should know where you stand. If it's a no then lesson learned. Good luck.

Answer 10

Why not? I think you should call her. Wednesday would be fine to set a date, just because you the day after you got her number doesn't mean she doesn't like you.