Here is my problem. My fiance' and I have been engaged for two months. Approx. two weeks after my sister and her now hubby got engaged, my dad offered her three choices for help, of which she was to choose what he was paying for. He paid for their entire wedding. He hasn't offered to help us pay for, or, pay at all for any of our expenses. Any suggestions? Of course, we expect to pay for most of it, but are just hurt and confused as to why he hasn't offered to help us yet... Thanks in advance!!
2007-03-05 10:31:36 · 15 answers · asked by jessiekarma 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
My financial situation is probably slightly worse than my sis', to answer one of the questions posted. Thank you so much, again! =)
2007-03-05 10:40:59 · update #1
One more thing, he loves my fiance', no probs there.
2007-03-05 10:42:37 · update #2
He probably realized that he can't afford to pay for 2 weddings. I am sure he is probably trying to find a way to figure out how to help you for your wedding. Give him time, and he will come through. If not then its because its a tough situation not because of him not wanting to.
2007-03-05 10:46:55 · answer #1 · answered by aysha a 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Only if you and your Sister sign a Prenuptual with your Father that you both promise to make your marriage last a minimum of 10 years. Your happienss and living in harmony with your Husband ...mutually will mean more to him than the cost of a wedding reception and Wedding ceremony.
It may be a tradition that the parent(s) of the Bride pay for most of the wedding or reception, but, it is also a tradition to make the marriage work.
But, besides these thoughts; you shouldn't even be getting married or planning a wedding if you are not financially on your feet and in good order. It would be better to have a small and meaningful Wedding but, better to have a more sound and successful marriage.
The important part of your wedding/marriage is every day that follows the day of your wedding. A time span that too many don't prepare to succeed in once they have had a flashy ceremony.
2007-03-05 11:52:56 · answer #2 · answered by The Sylvan Wizard 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Gosh, I can understand your feelings. That's tough. Tradition is that the bride's parents pay, but that seems to be changing. But gosh, if your Dad paid for Sis' wedding then he should pitch in something or at least make the offer. Such a deal. I don't know what to say, but maybe he will come around. I ended up paying for part of my son's wedding because her parents "didn't have any money" (BS). What ya gonna do.
2007-03-05 10:38:56 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think he just had the burden of paying for one wedding and he probably did not expect your engagement.....
Have you set your wedding date? Don't expect your dad to pay anything. If he does, than be gracious and thank him. If he does not keep your thoughts to yourself! Maybe he is not financially well off right now. Or he might think that you are probably not getting married for a while....
So, be patient and plan on paying everything yourself!
2007-03-05 10:38:17 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like it's a time for BOTH parents (your fiance and yours) to sit down for a talk.
Have you approached him about paying for the wedding? What is YOUR financial situation? What is his?
Look at it like this: He just paid for your sister's wedding. Do you have a full time job while she doesn't? What were the circumstances?
Before you jump to conclusions, TALK to both your families and divvy up the costs of the wedding. Set a budget and stick with it.
2007-03-05 10:36:43 · answer #5 · answered by FaZizzle 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Do you and your fiancee have a high paying job? Cause if you guys do, maybe that's the reason your dad's not offering help. Also, sometimes if it's in a hurry parents help out to pay. Another thing is if there's another circumstance i.e pregnant. Maybe that's another reason your dad is paying for your sister's wedding. One thing too, if your dad doesn't like your fiancee..
2007-03-05 10:38:52 · answer #6 · answered by rosemarie 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Personally, I would go to your father and tell him you are getting married and see what he says (I know he already knows). If he passes it off, that probably means something is wrong, as in he doesn't approve of the guy you are marrying or something else about the situation that he doesn't approve of. If this is the case, talk it out with him because he is family and you never want a big situation like that with family. It could be nothing at all or it could possibly be something. If he continues to pass it off, just accept that fact that he isn't going to pay for it, be happy with the man you are going to marry and continue to live your life for you.
2007-03-05 10:37:56 · answer #7 · answered by Lord Draven 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Are you more 'established' as far as money is concerned, than your sister was when she married? If so, your father may think you're better prepared for the cost and don't need his help as much.
He may also be having some financial problems he doesn't want to disclose.
He may just need to be asked if he'd be willing to help. The cost of your sister's wedding may have been a rude awakening for him as far as wedding costs go. He may be afraid to offer if he thinks it will cost a mint. If you go to him with the attitude that you expect to pay for most of it, he may be more willing to help.
Good luck!
2007-03-05 10:35:56 · answer #8 · answered by Lisa E 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
It gained't truly be your wedding ceremony, it truly is a renewal of vows. you in reality have one wedding ceremony and which may be the elopement. That stated, there is no longer something incorrect with getting married now and having a vow renewal ceremony later. you are able to do it up as if it were your first one. Congrats!
2016-12-05 07:10:02 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ask him what he thinks about you getting marriage. If he is happy or not about it. Then if he say yes then there is no problem at all. Also, let him you that you want him to help you out with the wedding. May be he thinks that you don't need any help it is up to you to let him know. One more question what about you future husband's parents? May be they can help too don't you think?
2007-03-05 10:53:56 · answer #10 · answered by Missy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋