Birth familys?

Question

i was fostered as a baby i was still with the same family till i was 17 and got adopted recently i contacted my birth mother who has another daughter but does not know about me she is 32 married and has kids my birth mother has not contacted me since i told her i was going to contact her should i contact my birth sister to tell her i excist and let her make up her own mind

Answer 1

This can be very traumatic for all concerned and has to be handled very carefully, I hope you were given counselling and help before you contacted your birth mother. For whatever reason she chose not to tell your sister about you. Do you have anyone who could act on your behalf and approach your sister for you sometimes these things are better coming face to face. You never know if your sister is interested in family history she may have guessed about you or even know about you.
I wouldnt just turn up on the doorstep but perhaps write a letter something short and introduce yourself but dont be upset if you dont hear straight away she may be upset at the news and not know how to react. Make sure your contact details are on there telephone, email or whatever you want.
My father has a half sister somewhere and I would love one day to find her and tell her the family didnt know about her until I started doing the family tree. I can relate somewhat to how you are thinking and feeling.
Your birth mother would probably be frightened herself goodness me what a secret to keep from the family. Anyway I really wish you good luck and just handle it in your own way slowly and carefully and hopefully it will have a happy ending for you.

Answer 2

there isnt reli any specific way to dealt with this situation, the most safe conclusion would be "time". Dont go straight to ur birth family "boom" it all out at their face; first, they dont noe how to react, n second, they mite hate u (im sure u dont want dat to happen). So, try to noe them...like as a friend. Then, maybe, when u guys haf gotten along well enough, give out hints or questions about another "hidden" birth brother/son. And when the time feels right, say it....slowly n plan it out carefully <-- no big emotions, keep it safe n tender i suppose--> After dat, it'll be all on fate. But plz keep in mind, therez always a reason y uve become unwanted so dont get emotional n get mad. Keep truth to urself, n be happy to haf found them, even if thingz doesnt work out as u haf imagined. The rest will be on YOU. Good Luck!!

Answer 3

Go for it. You might want to have a close friend or your new parents talk to you sister first to make sure she is ready to meet you.
Good Luck with all that!

Answer 4

I suggest you contact them thru an intermediary. That way you will know if they want to know you or not.

Answer 5

Yes, she has a right to know.

Answer 6

yes go ahead, and good luck, i mean it. give them time, it's a shock,