I have a good Boyfriend that treats me right most of the time...but right now he is having lots of family problems...his parents are separated and they are fighting over custody. He really wants to go with his grandma but he does not know what’s going to happen in court. I feel really, really bad that he has to go through all of this but all I think of saying is I’m sorry but I feel like its not good enough and that I can not comfort him enough can you give me some ideas as to how. He is 16 and I’m 15. And please don’t just say sex or anything like that I mean something I can say to him. Thank you all so much.
2007-03-05 09:38:15 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
He is 16 now, and he is capable of speaking up and stating his wishes. He can tell the lawyer where he wants to live. Tell him that you are there for him. If he needs a shoulder, you have 2 of them. Just let him no that you care about him.
2007-03-05 09:44:08 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What you can say is this:
"I know everything is your life seems to be going the wrong way, but everything happens for a reason. Something good ALWAYS comes out of something bad. You just have to have patience and see what happens. A lot of people go through this, and you were picked as a person to see how this goes through."
Try to get away from everyone and everything and take him somewhere private and lonesome where you two can talk alone...That way, he will let out his feelings to you and you will see what's going through his mind. If you can't think of anything to say on the spot, then you aren't being a true girlfriend and you don't care. Show him you care and give him advice just as you would want advice is this situation. Good luck!
2007-03-05 17:44:04 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, personally, I like hugs. A big, warm hug from a loved one always says "I feel sorry for you" way better than words can, and it also shows that you're a shoulder he can lean on.
Of course, it all depends on what kind of guy he is. A lot of guys don't like hugs or being touched because they have too much testosterone and they think it's unmanly or something. Then my advice won't help you, and you'll just have settle for saying "I'm here for you." Or if he's really down in the dumps, just do something you know will make him smile or laugh. Sometimes just something to take his mind off his problems for even a few seconds helps a bunch.
Good luck to you and him.
2007-03-05 17:49:04 · answer #3 · answered by Slacker 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I went through a simulair thing with my ex-boyfriend last year. i was 15 and he was 14. And i know it's so hard to find the right thing to say especially if you've never expirienced the same type of thing.
The best thing is too be with him. Hang out with him and try to get his mind off of it. Plan a day just for you two where it's total bonding between you to. You can bring up the situation in the begining of you two hanging out and ask him how he's doing but hten leave it at that.
Is he not budging and feeling sorry for himself? Still be there for him. Be sorry with him. As long as your there for him you're fulfilling your titale as a girlfriend. Sometimes actions speak louder than words.
P.S. Boys love food. Bake him cookies or brownies whatever he likes!
Good luck to you =]
2007-03-05 17:45:00 · answer #4 · answered by Beachblonde14 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seems like your doing fine. All you can say is that you are sorry and you are there for him and you hope it works out. If he wants to go to his grandmother then he should speak up at the hearing he is old enough to know what enviornment is best for him. Just be there with and let him know you are there for him. He isnt the only one that parents are seperated or divorced, and honestly it could be a whole lot worse. he just needs to know the divorce isnt his fault any way shape form or fashion. His parents are just good togethere anymore sometimes people grow apart, sometimes seperation makes a family closer. So Just love him and be a true friend to him he needs it. Good luck to you and him
2007-03-05 17:46:28 · answer #5 · answered by FauxDr 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, if I may say this, Truly there is nothing you can say. To make him feel better. I mean this, the only physical and emotional thing you can do for him is to step back and be there only in mind and friendship.
Do your best as long as it does not bring yourself down far as self respect and self esteem. To be there in friendship. I will not say or advise sexual it is only a temporary fix. That is not even enough. A human being wants to know they have someone they can turn too for a sounding board. We as women want to comfort, care take, sometimes the best is to listen, keep our lips shut and be there when our friend needs us to speak out even when it may hurt, we need to understand it is not personal unless it becomes personal then our instinct let's us know.
2007-03-05 18:15:17 · answer #6 · answered by Tazz H 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's difficult to say the right thing in a moment like this...u can tell him u r with him (spiritually n emotionally), that u'll be with him through this, DO NOT say, I understand, or it'll be over soon, cuz u don't know n u he may think u lied to him ;) if ur parents are still together have them talk to him ;) they may have wise words to say n they may/can give him the kind of love he needs right now (the love of a father n a mother). DON'T have sex with him it's NOT going to help him, n it'll hurt u as well
2007-03-05 17:45:26 · answer #7 · answered by ironman 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmmmm, this is tough. Sometimes, saying sorry is all that you can do. And he'll be happy to know that you care. So just let him know that you do care, tell him about ur feelings, and ow U R sry even though it's not ur fault, then give him a quick kiss. (unless u have never kissed b4) :-)). I hope that this helped.
2007-03-05 17:46:22 · answer #8 · answered by LaSqueegee[= 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You probably can't say anything. You just need to be supportive of him and not be so hard on yourself. When it's all over he will come to realize that you were the one who helped him get through it and that's what counts and you'll see you were good enough for him...good luck.
2007-03-05 17:43:32 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't say, just listen... I'm sure he has a lot on his mind and a lot that he wants to get out since he's going through a lot... just be there for him. And you can just tell him that you're there for him and he can talk to you about anything.... stuff like that... just let him know that you're there for him.
2007-03-05 17:45:40 · answer #10 · answered by F.J. 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋