I have dated my boyfriend for 3 months and I am the same size that I was when we met and now he is telling me the my size bothers him because he is use to girls that are much skinner. I do not fit his ideal superficial image that he likes but he loves everything else about me. ( I am not fat just curvy) I can always lose weight and work out hard to fit his ideal image but I want him to just love me for me. I can turn the tables because I make more money than him and I could look for a man with more money but I am looking for more because all my ex boyfriends made twice what he brings home but that is not the reason I am with him. I have never brought this up as an issue for me but I find myself confused because I care for him despite what kind of money he makes so why should my size matter to him? HELP!!
2007-03-05 07:12:33 · 14 answers · asked by raerae 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Sorry but we are extremely visual. It's not that he can't get beyond that but on average we respond to our visual preferences.
Why do you think so many gay guys look good....they know the only way to pick up other gay guys is to be visually pleasing. No data on that fact...just an observation.
2007-03-05 08:43:11 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your boyfriend is in a superficial world right now and to him size matters but the truth is that size is not what matter is what is inside a person that matters the most, bringing up money in that manner will only make matters worse as long as you are working and making money who should care about how much you make, whether or not it is six figures. You say you are find with you size well tell him that and stand flat footed about it and tell him that he can choose to accept you or not, but if he can not accept you as you are then you don't need to be with him, you are only exposing yourself to what he wants you to be instead of what you want to be. Don't do that, it will drag down your self esteem, be proud of you body even if it is curvy, you not just your body matters.
2007-03-05 07:20:43 · answer #2 · answered by gordonflames242003 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This can cause you to have low self-esteem, I feel. Do you? If you want to lose weight, lose it for yourself. And honestly, I would bring up the money thing. Get it all out in the beginning. In his mind, he probably thinks he's doing you a favor or something. Don't let him think that. I wouldn't date him anymore personally, but I don't know the whole story. Does he tell you that he cares about you and who you are too or does he just belittle you because of the curves?
2007-03-05 07:18:30 · answer #3 · answered by A B 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
genuinely I perfer a guy that drives a greater advantageous vehicle then me. As for earnings i could say he could could desire to make a minimum of 60,000 plus. relies upon on what state you're in besides, you be responsive to the fee of residing. I determine that one in each and every of those guy that i'm searching for now should be husband cloth, i'm no longer likely to waste my time on a guy understanding that it is not going everywhere. I nevertheless have self assurance that a guy could desire to make adequate to assist his kinfolk and placed some money into decrease fee expenditures to maintain for a wet day. i could decide for to have a guy that has his stuff mutually, has motivation to certainly seek for a good interest. So confident in maximum circumstances money does remember. Now if it have been a guy that i replaced into basically courting for relaxing and not searching for a destiny with him then the money element does not remember, it fairly is the different element that remember, length in case you be responsive to what I recommend.
2016-09-30 05:56:55 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me like his insecure and trying to come up with a way to feel power over you. If your size bothered him, I highly doubt he would have started dating you in the first place. Unfortunately, a lot of insecure men find that by degrading and insulting their woman, they can be the one in the driver's seat. Get a new man, girl!!! You should never change for anyone but yourself!
2007-03-05 07:25:17 · answer #5 · answered by Nunya 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Men can be so insensitive sometimes. I am afraid that looks mean a lot especially young guys. They want to be the one with the hot chick. Be the envy of their buddies. Sounds insane, and it is. If this guy is making you feel bad, and hurt, then find someone who will make you feel special. As long as you are happy with how you are, that is what counts. Look out for number one, always.
2007-03-05 07:20:08 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
you will no just turn it around and then you will see by the way he conducts himself and what he says he will be the loser in the end and also tell him that your the same size as you were when you first started going out.
2007-03-05 07:29:30 · answer #7 · answered by Mary O 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No matter how cute you are physically an ugly attitude gets you no where with me. You should remind him that you were the size you are when you got together.
2007-03-05 07:16:51 · answer #8 · answered by Just D 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say yes. Many would deny it but few would pass up a very beautiful girl under any circumstances.
2007-03-05 07:17:33 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he doesn't care for you when you are "curvy" what will he do if you (God forbid) ever got sick? He is superficial. Don't change your weight unless it is for you. Change boyfriends, that would be for you too.
2007-03-05 07:16:47 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋