me and my girlffriend have been together for a year and a half and weve had our ups and downs as all of us do..... we broke up 3 months ago (i broke up with her)for a whole month during which time she was talking to her x boyfriend .... She kissed him a number of times.... the screwed up part is he goes and dies and now were back together and everytime i look at her i think about her with him regaurdless of how much i care for her! it makes me shake from how angry i get.... she says shed still be with me even if he was still around but i cant help but think she thinks about him alot...any ideas on how to deal with this>?
2007-03-05 06:21:03 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
are you a suspect in his death? lol
But seriously... take a break from her for awhile... date some other women... if you miss her, then maybe u can try again later... but for now... u guys need a break.
2007-03-05 06:25:00 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What if half the things you thought you needed, you didn't really need at all? Imagine the freedom of letting them go.
What if half the things that worry you so much were really no cause for concern? Think of how much more positive and productive you could be.
Some of your needs and your worries have some basis in reality. Yet they can easily become blown far out of proportion by your thinking.
You can choose to put them in their place. You can choose to simply let them fall away and to put your energy into those things that truly matter.
This is a great day to begin living with positive, creative intention. This is a great day to go beyond the limitations that your mind has previously convinced you to accept.
Open your eyes to the abundance that is yours. Focus more energy on your best possibilities and bring your own special joy to life.
2007-03-05 14:28:27 · answer #2 · answered by lindaj0409 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Simple really Stop living in the past and look forward to the future. You cannot go through life with ifs or buts hanging over your head. Sure she is going to think about him, the bloke died, but at the end of the day she is with you!!! if she didn't really want to be with you she wouldn't have come back she would've got on with her life. anytime you start thinking about her & him immediately start thinking of things that you and her have done together that you both really enjoyed, like a great holiday or day out you had. Focus on the good parts of you and her and you will think less and less about her and him
2007-03-05 14:28:55 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok first off...she's upset b/c an x boyfriend DIED!...I know I would be sad if someone I once loved died...I think that's just how it is.
As for you getting mad at the thought of him...its normal...any guy would be jealous and probably have thoughts like your having now...
But I really think this is fate that you two are back together...and I'd say you just have to trust her...if she says she'd be with you even if he was around you just have to believe her...but if it would make you feel better maybe you should tell her how you're feeling...but be compassionate to her feelings too
2007-03-05 14:26:56 · answer #4 · answered by icingonthekake99 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you love her & it sounds as if you do, then you have to do just that YOU MUST LET GO OF THE PAST & LEARN TO COPE!!!!!!!!!!! YOU SIMPLY CANNOT COMPETE WITH A DEAD PERSON. You admit that you two have had your ups and downs, I feel quite certain that you have probably been with a few women during your bouts of "break-up" Many men have off and on relatioships with women they love before they eventually marry them. They initiate a break up every so often or they act so horrible that they leave the other with no other option BUT TO BREAK UP, then during these "break ups" they are free to engage in casual flings with other women. My husband and I have a pretty good marriage based on Trust & honesty & we have weathered our share of storms, but the oone thing we both know and agree with 100% is the only way we were actually able to nake our marriage work (for over ten years now) The past is the past. We cannot ake it back, we can not hit delete or undo anything no matter how badly we want to nor how much we wish something did not happen. So before you get back involved in a romantic, exclusive, monogomous relationship, you have to be willing to and able to respect that the past is just that, the past. if you want to make the most of the present & make the future eork you have to let go of the past. I realize that this is too difficultfor some people, but those people (and if you are one fo them) cannot help it that they cannot let go, they may try but something sets them off and all comes back to them and the fighting staarts etc. if this describes you, then you have to admit it to yourslef and your g/f and let her go and noth of you get on woith your lives seperately, but if you can do it, let go of the past and make this work!!!
another thing my husband taught me, when he was younger, he used to initiate these little "break-ups" with prior girlfriends, for the sole purpose of being able to have a fling withput the guilt, i mean because techically they were "broken up"
You broke up with her this time, so you have toi accept her "as is" or let her go, i hope you can can let go of the past and build a future with her because you obviously love her.
Believe her when she tells you that she would be with you whether he died or not. look at your hisory, didn't the two of you always manage to find your way back to each other?????Don't give her the impossible task of proving something to you that you know she can't. he is dead. so you cannot view that option any other way. that is your way of asetting her up for failure and it is wrong. YOU LOVE HER, THEN PROVE IT, BELIEVE HER, BELIEVE IN HER, TRUST HER BECAUSE WITHOUT TRUST YOU HAVE NOTHING!
2007-03-05 14:42:49 · answer #5 · answered by dreamwhip 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first is that you need to look inside your heart and ask yourself why you are back together with her if you broke up with her? do you really want to be with her? if so, then let it be and give it time. distract yourselves. go do something new... take a forest hike, talk about everything and anything...just try to come true and clean with what you feel... Good Luck!
2007-03-05 14:27:01 · answer #6 · answered by freebird31wizard 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let her go....and if she comes back to you then you'll know. If you are missing her tremendously when you two are apart then that could definitely be a sign that you are meant to be together.
2007-03-05 14:37:04 · answer #7 · answered by benz s55 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your NOT happy get the **** out! it dont matter how much you say you love the ***** just get the **** out while you still can!
2007-03-05 14:26:12 · answer #8 · answered by hottiewatchout 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
go take a piss on his grave
2007-03-05 14:25:10 · answer #9 · answered by joe h 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋