My boyfriend of 2 years has a cousin (he's like a brother to) getting married in July, I know the fiance (met her on their first date a year ago!) And she's not inviting me to her wedding shower or bachelorette party..I find that very wrong! I am just as much apart of the "family" at this stage as she is. I think its very rude and poor class. What do you think? Should I be invited?
2007-03-05 05:32:45 · 33 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
I think you should be invited.
On the other hand, can you think of any reason for her not to invite you? I don't want to make things worse but is it possible that your boyfriend might have said something to them or her about not happy about you , maybe, he wants to split with you?
It just seems to be a no-brainer not to invite you. There must be a reason.
2007-03-05 05:39:35 · answer #1 · answered by tracy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry to tell you this but at this stage of the game you really aren't part of her wedding and shouldn't be expecting any invites. Being invited is a privilege not a right.
Also - don't forget - it's not her doing the invitations to the parties it's other people probably her friends & family who probably don't even know you especially if you don't associate with the couple frequently. NOW if your boyfriend doesn't get an invitation to the wedding including a guest ....then you have a right to be insulted.
2007-03-05 05:39:36 · answer #2 · answered by Lucy 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Are you invited to the wedding? I don't find it rude...she might be trying to save money, or maybe she wants more of her family at the bridal shower and her friends at the bachelorette party. I know when I get married, my bridal shower will be that way along with my bach. party. I will be doing that to save money, and I have specific people that I want to share that time with. Just because she didn't invite you to these things does not mean she doesn't think that you are part of the family. It is HER wedding after all and not YOURS.
2007-03-05 11:56:25 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is the bride and although you might feel slighted and I am sure that I would too in your position there really isn't anything you can do. Maybe she is only inviting her wedding party or maybe she honestly forgot about you. I don't know hun, and I am sorry but it is her wedding and she can do what she likes. I would be the bigger person and still get her something small for the shower, I only had a shower and not both parties, for me that is asking guests to give way to many gifts, shower, party, wedding, I mean come on. But again that is just me.
2007-03-05 05:37:29 · answer #4 · answered by Hawaiisweetie 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I definitely feel you should be invited to the wedding. You have been going out with him for two years. It shows a commitment and "yes" that you are part of the family.
The bachelorette party, I guess that is different because you stated that you met her a year ago and you do not mention that you have seen her again and usually "that" type of party is mean't for really close friends that you will be ending an era with of partying. You know what I mean?
But the wedding, YOU should definately be there. Talk to your boyfriend and let him know how you feel but please do not argue with him about it. Even though this is his cousins soon-to-be-wife, you can't blame him for her negligence. I just don't want this to cause a riff within your relationship. If you have spoken to her recently, bring it up! Ask why you are not invited to the wedding and I think she owes you a good explanation.
Hope this helps.
Good Luck
and "yes" you are right to be upset.
2007-03-05 05:44:04 · answer #5 · answered by megabites42 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Look, you may just be taking this more personal than it is.You just said you know him but met her a year ago.Do you hang with her? is that the last time you have seen her or done anything with her? You see, It may just be that she has alot of close friends and family and the person who is setting this up may not be very aware of you and didn't add you to the invite list.Most all of these things are set up by the maid of honor and she is the one to do the invites.
Or maybe its just that she already has alot of people on the list and can only afford to have her very close friends and family for this.Again, I am sure it isn't personal but choice that had to be made.I am sure you are not the only one left out of this.Try getting to know her more in the future and become closer and I am sure you will always be invited to future things.
Good Luck!
2007-03-05 05:42:43 · answer #6 · answered by vmaxer85 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bridal shower etiquette:
Who should be invited to the bridal shower?
The mother-of-the-bride and mother-of-the-groom should always be invited to the shower - along with the bride, of course! (As well as step-mothers on both sides.)
Sisters of the bride and groom are also generally invited to every bridal shower, but have the option of choosing to attend just one.
People who are not invited to the wedding should not be invited to the bridal shower.
Other than that, the bride and hostess should work together to come up with the guest list for the bridal shower. Numbers should be kept within the hostess' budget (brides, be respectful of their wishes!) and hostess' you should clearly set this limit from the beginning.
Couples showers are becoming more popular, but keep in mind that this can double the guest list.
As far as the bachelorette party she should invite the people she wants it is her party.
2007-03-05 05:38:04 · answer #7 · answered by jtaylor1993 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are a girlfriend she is a fiance so you are on totally two different levels as far as getting into the family goes. Perhaps she doesn't feel like she knows you well enough to invite you to the shower and make you feel like you have to bring a gift. Also, someone else throws the shower and maybe they told her only so many guests or something like that. Don't be offended. I am sure your boyfriend will bring you to the wedding.
Good luck!
2007-03-05 05:38:28 · answer #8 · answered by Raspberry 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Whether you should or shouldn't be invited, it is her shower and her party. If she doesn't want somebody there, it's ultimately her decision. I would make sure that I at least had a present for her at the shower and wish her all the luck in the world. You'll be able to decide one day if you want her at your shower or party and you'll have your day. She may have overlooked you, but she also just may not want you there. It's the way of the world, but I would at least make sure she had a gift from me at her shower and try to take the higher road. If all goes well, your day will come.
2007-03-05 05:40:15 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It would be sad if you weren't invited to the wedding, but the wedding shower and bachelorette party are her thing. If she wants to invite certain people and not others, that's fine. Fewer gifts you have to buy!
2007-03-05 17:57:32 · answer #10 · answered by calliope320 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's her party. Maybe because she doesn't know you that well she isn't inviting you so that you don't feel forced to buy a present. I only invited close friends and family to my bachlorette party not girfriends of cousin. Weddings and all that go with cost a lot of money and cuts have to be made somewhere.
2007-03-05 05:48:18 · answer #11 · answered by sassssy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋