My boyfriend got killed 4 months ago and since then I've been on medication for depression. I still cry for him and miss him like hell but I hate the pills I don't want to be on them anymore. The doctor thinks that I still need them. What should I do????
2007-03-05 04:53:44 · 21 answers · asked by Blair26 1 in Health ➔ Mental Health
Grief is a difficult thing to cure. It is different for everyone. I would stay on the meds and continue therapy. The only thing that will help is time. You will never stop loving him, but over time, you will learn how to live again. Sorry for your loss. My heart goes out to you.
2007-03-05 04:57:13 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 4⤋
Antidepressants are for people who have a mood disorder called depression. What you're going through is not a mood disorder, it's mourning, and it's natural. We "should" feel sad when bad things happen. It's when we feel sad all the time and for no reason, or if we feel so very sad that we may harm ourselves or others, that we need medical intervention. Lose the drugs, but taper off gradually--don't just abruptly stop taking them--UNLESS you fall into once of those categories I mentioned.
FWIW, I think of grief as having a half-life, like radium. Months from now, you'll feel half as sad as you do now. A year or so, half-so again. Years and years from now, when you think of your boyfriend, the recollection will still be tinged with the memory of your grief. But it won't overwhelm you as it does now. And you WILL feel better than you do now someday, without the drugs.
Find someone to talk to. It doesn't have to be a shrink, but it could be.
I know you'll work it out. Good luck.
2007-03-05 15:10:10 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I have never been a big fan of the anti depressants. they are so over prescribed today. You know why you are feeling the way you do. You need to work on getting over this horrible event and do so as quickly as is possible for you. It will take you a good long while to get over this. But you must do things to move the process along. Dont be a mope and just hang around the house wallowing in your pain. Go out and see a sunset or walk on the beach. Read a good upbeat book. If you think you can handle it tell your doctor to wean you off the meds. Sometimes the meds make things worse.
2007-03-05 13:02:32 · answer #3 · answered by Devdude 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I lost my best friend only a few months ago so i know how hard a time you would be going through , at the end of the day it all about time to cope and accept the death of the person you cared so much for , but if you don't want to be on tablets then just stop taking them only you know if they make you feel better, the doctor is only a guide but can't make you take anything !!
And remember this though alot of people are still here and will love and care for you , but there is no time limit on grieving .
If you want to talk or anything just email me and we can talk about anything on your mind
take care and hope this helps xxx
2007-03-05 14:12:35 · answer #4 · answered by fulhamish 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Start by talking to your Doctor again...you may be on the wrong meds. If he doesn't agree, get a second opinion. Not all anti-depressive medication is for everyone...my doctor tried 3 different kinds until we found the one that works for me. I'm real sorry about your boyfriend..what a tragedy to have to face at such a young age...but know that dispite it...you are still here and God has a great plan for your life...it is to do good and not evil...He will heal you and comfort you...He is the bearer of life...being sad is a normal reaction to his tragic end...but staying depressed is not...you may have a chemical imbalance that does not allow you to heal...and keeps the pain fresh in your mind...seek help..please...you will only be a healthier person for it..and believe me when I tell you God has someone out there just for you....and you want to be healthy when he comes around, be it now or a few years from now...you need to be healed...God Bless sweetie!!
2007-03-05 13:59:30 · answer #5 · answered by shawn t 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I'm very sorry for your loss.
May I suggest, dump the doctor...tell him you want to be weened off the medication. That terrible pain and sorrow you feel is perfectly natural.."Perfectly" - "Natural". Do not rob yourself of these feelings by medicating life's experiences. This IS NOT the only time this is going to happen. I have lost 75 percent of my family, many friends, lovers, even pets. Each time you work through it, you see the picture a little bit clearer. If you medicate to ease the hurt, you will never learn how to cope.
When I lose someone, I think back on the good feelings that person shared with me and I think about how they would want me to move through it, Honor them by being strong and moving forward. It will never get easier, it will just start to make more sense. One thing you'll always have is....the time you spent with them was yours and yours alone, and what a gift to have them in your life. Your pain is less than the love you felt, use the love to heal THEIR pain, because as long as you hurt ...THEY hurt too.
2007-03-05 13:21:35 · answer #6 · answered by twostories 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Was it your primary care physician who prescribed the anti-depressants? If that's the case, I'd probably go see a psychiatrist. You can talk to a shrink about your feelings on meds, and maybe you'd be able to get by with counselling. However, if a shrink thinks you need to be on meds a while longer, then I would abide with that opinion. The meds are there for a reason and you should never just stop taking them unless advised to do so.
2007-03-05 13:04:39 · answer #7 · answered by Erin 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Depression goes away only with medical help.Its not sorrow nor melancholia.I know that for sure cause i do suffer from depression.Sometimes ppl think they r cured from depression and stop taking pills but thats a big mistake.Pills must be taken for a long time.U must take them or else u will start having phobias,panic attacks and feel suicidial.And those r only a few of the symptoms.The doctor DOES NOT want ur money.He knows his job.Sorry for ur loss.Be well!
2007-03-05 13:09:52 · answer #8 · answered by ella e 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I think you are still in mourning and your doctor may be right. If you are really feeling against the medication, go back to the doctor and tell him/her of your concerns about the meds and why he/she thinks you still need them. Good luck and I am sorry for your loss
2007-03-05 14:16:21 · answer #9 · answered by slw_402000 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course you miss him, you're supposed to.
But think of him, and would he want you to go through the day like this.....No...he wanted the best for you...right...You need to realize that the sun will rise tomorrow and you are there to move forward. The pills.....I dunno I'm not a doctor, But if you feel you can get past this by picking your Butt up an moving ahead then you win...Always remember the one we love that have gone ahead. Make the rest of our lives on earth better for the people we knew.
God bless and let's GO!
2007-03-05 12:59:54 · answer #10 · answered by Uncle Red 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Let me start by saying how sorry I am for your loss.
The meds may not be the right prescription for you. Everyone reacts to medications differently, and the wrong medication can be much worse than none at all. Please discuss this with your doctor so that he can better help you. Do not simply stop taking the medication, as this can be very dangerous.
Also, if it were me, I'd look into grief counseling. I know many who this has helped.
Best of luck to you.
2007-03-05 13:05:16 · answer #11 · answered by Dictatormama 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋