First off, I am a 29 y/o male virgin ,which i'm sure is probally less than 1% of the whole population. My problem is, I've always been sexually charged and everything works normal just like it should. I've had plenty of chances in my life to lose my virginity and many times I have been so turned on and ready to just jump in head first ,but I continue to fight so hard to hold those feelings back and never go through with it fully. I've never used the excuse I want to wait till I'm married ,because I only want to fill in my heart that I'm with the right person. Well now, I'm truly feeling that for first time in my life. I'm with the most incredible girl and I want to fully give myself to her on every level. I am 100% in love ,no question about it for the first time in my life and I want to do what is natural and make love to her ,but everytime we get in the moment I get really scared and pull away. (I'm out of space. please don't begin to answer untill I add more details coming.)
2007-03-05 04:17:10 · 7 answers · asked by ski26er 2 in Health ➔ Other - Health
I know I want to go through with it and in fact never have I felt more sure of wanting to in my life. This is indeed the person I want to spend the rest of my life with ,but I got to overcome this fear of insertion ,cause thats moreless what I think it is ,cause I'm diffently not afraid of the ideal of sex ,but more of what it's gonna be like on that first insertion. I gotta overcome this very soon ,because last night I was fully ready to go and she even put the condom on my penis for me and the moment was perfect and set to go off ,but I just couldn't do it and it mad here kinda mad and I guess unwanted with me telling her how much I want to make love to her and yet I don't go through with it when the moment is there. Will somebody please help me cause this is an extreme problem that I know can ruin our relationship. I hope "health" is the right catogory for this question and it gets some much needed attention cause I couldn't find a better catorgory. PLEASE HELP ME!
2007-03-05 04:31:38 · update #1
Dont worry just push it goes in real easy because its supposed to,just make sure you have plenty of foreplay first so shes ready too. Good luck but you dont really need it.
2007-03-09 11:37:47 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh sweety you have placed to much importance on the actual act. You need to separate the act of sex from the emotion of love.Being a good "lover" does in no way make you a good partner. First off be honest.. tell her how you feel, this will take some of the stress away. then just relax, take it slow and take baby steps. after she or you have put on the condom don't go straight to intercourse, enjoy each others body in other ways first.Have her close her eyes and while using just your finger tips lightly touch her from head to toe and then have her do the same. When you feel relaxed have her straddle you and have her insert you into her. Don't worry if things go quick at this point. each time will get better.Think of this as "sex" not love making your already in love. Good luck!
2007-03-05 13:20:31 · answer #2 · answered by GI 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know this will sound mad, but don't stress it- she loves you, she knows that you're worried, and you guys need to take it slowly-
if you really feel too nervous to go through with it you may as well take the time to get to know each other better (you've already waited this long- why spoil it with a less than fantastic first time?)
and i'm Not being girly when i say "get to know each other better" there are Plenty of other things you can do besides penetration, and i personally think that it sounds as though you'd feel more comfortable if you were more familiar with each others bodies?
Do fantastic dirty things, tell her you love her and wait a bit (if you spend the time "waiting" giving fantasatic head I doubt very much that she'll complain....)
2007-03-05 12:53:10 · answer #3 · answered by sparkpixie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you ever masturbated? this may ease the anxiety of what to expect... let your girl know how you feel and that this is your first time. i think you r just gonna have to bite the bullet and do it! It wont last very long the first few times but theres plenty more to come - trust me!once you do it you'll wonder what all the fuss was about!! also you sound like every womans dream - not many guys these days wait for someone they care about. I've only ever slept with one guy and can only ever think of having sex with someone that i love, i just cant seee myself having mindless sex with random people?! its pretty special when you keep it special...
2007-03-05 12:38:55 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have done the right thing so far if u are 100% sure in real worthy love just marry her and be sure that ur first time together in marriage will be great, pure, loyal and dedicated. sure u can see how affairs and casual relaltions end up unhappily cause people mix pleasure with good and bad charecteristics and justify things till reality shows that they rushed it all and sex isnt enough to make a relationship last
2007-03-05 12:43:01 · answer #5 · answered by tata 1 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Why not talk to her about it and maybe together you can come to an agreement together about having sex before or after marriage. Good luck.
2007-03-12 11:41:00 · answer #6 · answered by Mary 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
...please, Gomer !!! ...if and when the opportunity arrises and you can do what "all mankind" has done since Adam got Eve, then call me... I show you...step by step how it's done ! bring the video and the pop-corn we're gonna make a mess of the place... comm'on lad... YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO !
2007-03-13 10:25:24 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋