My 3 year old still uses a bottle of milk when he goes to bed at night...?

Question

I have tried several times to tell him that "big boys" go to bed without a bottle...I have tried not giving it to him, but he will cry for HOURS in his room. I breaks my heart. I know that I should have gotten rid of it sooner, that is my biggest mistake. I know that he does not NEED a bottle to go to sleep, but he just breaks my heart!Another factor in all this is that he and my one year old daughter share a room... what can I do to get him to stop using a bottle to sleep?

Thank you guys so much for your answers! I did learn my lesson with my daughter, I have not instilled the same habit with her. She does not take a bottle to bed. It is impossible for them to have separate rooms, unfortunatly. You are all right, my husband and I need to step up. I do love the cuddle with him before bed idea. I think that will work! He does use a cup during the day and does not ask for a bottle until he goes to bed, so after reading your suggestions, that implies that he does know that it is something that "big boys" are not supposed to do. Thanks again for all you help.

Answer 1

You are going to have to be the adult in this situation and let him have a fit. A 3 year old absolutely does not need a bottle and absolutely knows it. You're going to have to bear a broken heart for a couple nights to get him over it. He's resilient and he'll bounce back. He's also doing it because he wants to still be the baby -- in light of the fact that your daughter (a baby) shares his room. The baby shouldn't be taking a bottle to bed either! Break these habits now - both at the same time. I'm not sure what to do about the crying part of it, but you're going to have to suffer through a few rough nights and get him over this hump. Maybe talking throughout the day about how he doesn't need a bottle would help. Also let him take responsibility for his "habit" and have him help you cut all the nipples to the bottles and throw them all away or clean the bottles and give them to Goodwill (without nipples, of course). Good luck.

Answer 2

OK you got a few mistakes going on here. Yes you should have done this long ago so it is going to be harder to break the habit now. That is want it is a bad habit.

You are going to have to harden your heart and put up with the noise because he is not gonna give it up without a fight now. Explain it again and then take the bottle away. Do not give it back to him no matter how much fuss he makes or you will only teach him that a big enough fuss will get him his way.

You need to get him out of the room with your daughter. for one thing he is getting too old and for another it is not fair to put him to bed and not give him a bottle when he must watch you give one to the baby. He will not understand the disparity. If he does not see this it will be easier. If you cannot give him his own room then you are gonna have to explain why the baby gets a bottle and he can no longer have one. You could try buying him a special toy, stuffed animal to sleep with in place of the bottle. Good Luck

Answer 3

You're just going to have to toughen up and deal with him breaking your heart. You're not doing him any favors by letting this continue, and it won't hurt him to "cry for HOURS" until he gets used to the new rule.

My kids have had four pediatricians (we moved and changed insurances a few times), and ALL of them told me at one point or another when they were babies not to put them to bed with a bottle. It makes them dependant, and it also can cause dental problems later on. At that age, he doesn't even need to be on sippy cups.

Explain to your son (during the day) that since he's a big kid, he will not have any more bottles. Take him to a party supply store, or the party supply area of Walmart/Target, wherever you do your shopping. There are sturdy plastic cups/tumblers with almost every character party pack there is. Let him pick out several of them (they're 1-2 dollars each). My kids have Spongebob, Dora, Spider-man, Batman, Superman, Teen Titans, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, etc. At bedtime, let him pick which cup he wants to take to bed with him. Let him have some water in it, and let that be it. Don't put your daughter to bed with a bottle, since it's really not a good idea anyway, and that keeps the bedroom bottle-free. My three-year-old has stopped using sippy cups since well before his third birthday. Yes, there were spills, but now he does just fine. We give him his water at bedtime, and he drinks it and leaves the cup on his dresser where he can reach it if he wants some more.

When he cries, go to the other side of the house and turn the tv or some music on. If you're married, work with your husband on this, either to deal with him, or to comfort/restrain you. He'll stop crying eventually, and he'll understand that it's cool to be the big kid. Right now, this is nothing more than him testing you, and he has got you whipped, and he knows it.

Use a sippy cup with your daughter, or just give her her bottle/cup before bedtime and then put her down liquid-free. If you don't break that habit soon, you could be going through the same thing with her in a few years.

Good luck.

Answer 4

By allowing your 3 year old to suck on a bottle your doing many things that arent in his best interest. First youre rotting his teeth, which will be the teeth he needs until at least age 7 or so. Sugar that sits on teeth over night rots them. Your the parent, its time to grow up. Take the bottle that should of been taken by age 12 months. This is a lack of parenting of your part! His sister has nothing to do with his behavior, this is your fault. Simply take the bottle from him its really not that hard. Crying is good for his lungs let him cry, he wont do this but a couple days. By giving in to him your telling him he can throw a fit and get whatever he wants from you weather its bad for him or not. Your 1 year old daughter shouldnt be on a bottle either. Throw out all the bottles in your home. If you think it breaks your heart for him to cry wait until all his teeth are rotten and hes crying because he has a mouth full of pain, thats your fault. Im willing to bet that always breaks your heart.

Answer 5

ok i see you have a lot of answers, did not read them. but you should have broke him of the bottle at least 1yr ago. but you live you learn right. will he take a sippy cup? try to give him that at bed time i know it's not any better, but it's not a bottle. let him get a drink the set on his dresser, bed side table, where ever he can reach it to get a drin during the night. but you have to be stern and not give in to him i know it's hard i have 2 girls that got what ever they wanted. i was staying worn out all the time. but your the mom you have to put your foot down sometimes. i know it breaks your heart. i did mine and i'm sure any other normal mother. as for as your daughter sleep in the same room. do the have the same bed time? does he go to bed at the same time or before? she will cope w/ it also. try the sippy cup at bed time first. then if that don't work the be the mother and take away from him all together. good luck

Answer 6

First of all yes, you should have stopped that bottle a long time ago..when your daughter was born would have been a good time to explain bottle are for babies and he is a big brother now ! Now it is not only a terrible habit to break, it is also exposing his teeth to serious decay issues, as he is not going to bed with clean teeth, milk rot is a serious problem in toddlers. Try to switch to water in his bottle, then cut the hole bigger and explain that they must be broken, go out together and buy a big boy cup, one that does not spill and let him have a cup of milk before bedtime with a story or different bedtime ritual. GOOD LUCK!

Answer 7

Change his bedtime routine.

Start having a cuddle with him while he has his bedtime bottle till he finishes it. That way, he still gets the bottle, but he’s not taking it to bed.

Once that’s going good (a week or two) then start changing the routine so that you do something else where he doesn’t have a bottle. Or give him a choice of a treat or the bottle BEFORE bed. That way sometimes he has it, sometimes he doesn’t. The times he has it will decrease in frequency until he’s just not getting it at all.

Answer 8

Take him to the store and buy him a new toy that he might like to sleep with. At bedtime, give that to him instead of the bottle. Don't say anything to him about not giving him the bottle. Act like you just forgot, so as not to make a bigger deal out of it. I'm sure that he will still throw a fit, but you'll just have to deal with it for a few days. Just explain to him that that is why he got a new toy to sleep with, so he'll have someone to keep him company instead of his bottle.
He will still probably carry on about it. But he will stop in time. I know it breaks your heart, but the consequences of him going to sleep with a bottle of milk are much worse. Milk has hidden sugars in it that will destroy your son's teeth. He needs to brush his teeth good before bed to keep his teeth healthy. I have seen kids who's parents let them have bottles for too long. Nasty, brown and black rotten teeth. I knew one kid, whose whole bottom row of teeth were all silver with fillings because of the bottle problem.
And furthermore, you kids have you whipped! They know all they have to do is cry and they will get what they want! They are smarter than you think sometimes and they know how to push mom and dad's buttons. If you can't put your foot down when he is three, what will you do when he is older?

Answer 9

I would say that 1st if you have to give him a bottle to go to bed- never giv them milk always water (it is roting his teeth)

I know it's hard, but you can not give in to your kids. your first mistake was NOT letting him have the bottle this long, it's giving in to your "heart brake" as a mom you need to lay the law. your not his friend, your his mommy, witch can be even better! but less fun. if you give in on this he will keep playing with your heart strings untill you just let him do what he wants.

Is a bottle that bad? No- but you have alreaddy told him no- so DO NOT go back on what you said.

It is too bad that your baby shares his room- but that is just what it's like to be a big brother some times.

I know it sounds harsh, but mommy's job is hard. good luck. I feel for you!

Answer 10

Could you try staying with him and rubbing his back to comfort him until he goes to sleep? Maybe, giving him a special stuffed animal or etc. Maybe using a pacifier at first if you have to get him away from the bottle. Or, rocking him to sleep without a bottle. Lastly, putting something that moves where he can see it but not touch it. Something colorful and soothing with maybe a little soft music. I hope you find the answer soon for both of your sakes.