anxiety sufferer feeling intimidated! should I quit?

Question

I have recently been signed off sick by my doctor and put on meds. The problem is every time I have to see my boss to give him the sick note I feel intimidated. I do not know if it is in my mind as he had always been great. Today I had to give a sick note for 1 month and I could tell by the look on his face he was not happy. The problem is I have to see him to get my sick pay every week as they do not pay by cheque. The whole thing is making me feel even worse, should I quit my job?

Answer 1

No you shouldn't quit. You are signed off officially by the Doctor, and you are completely within your rights to do so. Its not worth feeling guilty about, you will only make yourself more ill. If you want to apologise, do so, but don't let guilt make you A) quit, or B) go back to work before you are ready.

Could you not get someone else to collect your sick pay? That way you wouldn't have to face him every week.

Answer 2

No don't quit ... If you have the following symptoms and really want to show him it is a real disorder, show him. I had to drop out of a class in my gradute program due to anxiety and was going to try to fight it with the disability office, but it got to be too late, and I had to wait a whole year to graduate because of it.

Social anxiety can cause these feelings.
http://www.socialanxietyinstitute.org/ds...

Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/cognitive_b... worked best for me. I suffered from social anxiety for over 15 years. I've tried meds, individual therapy, and group therapy and studied psychology for 10 years, as a profession, but also with the hope to cure myself.

Depending on your comfort level, you could go to a psychologist that practices CBT and specializes in anxiety disorders, seek a group therapy, or create one. Usually those that do attend the group therapy are a bit more high functioning because as you know, it can be difficult to speak in a group.

Another idea is to see if there are any local research studies being conducted that you could participate in.

The program that finally worked the best for me is this one: http://www.socialanxiety.us/findinghelp.... and I was lucky enough to have a structured behavioral group to go along with it. Sometimes the people that actually attend this program come back home and form groups.

Any questions, let me know ... I can't tell you how much this has improved my life!

Answer 3

It's not your fault your sick, anybody can fall sick at anytime your boss may suffer a personal tragedy and may have to have time off work.

Work is just money for labour and skills YOU possess thats why they employed YOU.

So don't quit unless it's the Job thats giving you the anxiety in the first place then time to look for a new job/career.

Even then keep picking up the sick pay until you find a new job.

Answer 4

Oh boy can I relate to you. I have had these urges/thoughts as well. Keep this in mind; noone has ever gone crazy from an anxiety attack. If you are at home, try the following to relax: 1. Close your eyes and picture yourself seated in a chair in a long hallway. (Any kind of chair you want it to be and any size hallway). 2. Now picture the colors, red, orange, yellow, blue, pink and lavendar. 3. Now picture a lavendar cloud moving toward you and covering you. 4. Now while in the lavendar cloud you are moving toward a stairway where there is a door. (The stairway and door can be any shape, size, or pattern you want). 5. Now you have a key in your hand and you unlock and open the door. 6. Now picture any relaxing scene behind that door that you want. A beach, a park, anything! Hope this helps. it sounds like alot, but it goes fast in your mind. Helps put one to sleep too.

Answer 5

No, dont quit. There is nothing to be ashamed of. Anxiety is a real medical condition. Hang in there. Dont worry about your boss. Good luck to you. I hope you overcome the anxiety. I have been living with it for 16 years now and I know it makes you feel like hell.

Answer 6

if you quit your job, won't that make you feel even EVEN worse? it seems from what you have said that you care enough about your job to provide them with documents instead of quitting. and you obviously care what your boss thinks of you, so imagine how you would feel after throwing it away. at least this way, with a job to go back to when you are on the mend, you have something to look forward to, some continuation of what you considered to be a 'normal' life before, instead of facing an unknown future on top of trying to recover your health.
I would go in next week with a thankyou card, or a little gift for your boss to thank him for being understanding during this difficult time for you. not as emotional blackmail, but as a way of connecting just a little as humans and letting him know that you are sensitive to his reaction to the situation.
There are also programs when you return to work that make sure that both you and your boss understand the kinds of duties that are appropriate for you on returning to work, make sure you take it easy.
i think i've written enough, the rest is up to you.
whatever happens, take deep breaths and smile often

Answer 7

Stick to your guns. If employer doesnt like it then ....tough !! thats all part of being an employer.
what do you do ?
Intimidation is a form of bullying and if you feel you have to leave well is that constructive dismissal ?
Do you have a union ? Speak to th CAB (citizens advice ) they are brill.

So if you broke your were leg for example and couldnt egt out and about ........how would they pay you then ? or if you in hospital ??
Good luck , stay strong .

Show them you are better than them

Answer 8

Don't quit, try to find the confidence to explain to him that the way you are paid just adds to your anxiety. I was in a similar situation and quit and regret it to this day. I hope you start to feel a little better soon.

Answer 9

No..do not quit..that will only reinforce the anxiety. You have to learn to face the fear. I do not know where you live..but in the USA you cannot be fired for this problem. Learn to stand up for yourself. Continue your meds and therapy. If you say your boss is great, maybe he is concerned for you. Do not let the fear run your life. Face your fears and they disappear.

Answer 10

I don't think that you should quit maybe try apologizing for being sick even though you have no control over it and promise when you come back you'll work harder than ever to make up for lost time.