My child is 4 years old and is doing o.k. in school but he is anti-social, what is your opinion?

Question

He does not like to participate in social games and always wonders off and looks at the clouds, trees and the general surrounding. His interest is zero in socializing in games. He does like to have visitors and stuff ate home but when it comes to after school programs he is totally not interested at all.

On another note, he always ask repetitive questions like, Why is the shop closed? and when I give him the answer, he keeps repeats the question after I told him. This goes on evry day! Also he is dogmatic about ballons and stuff, he doesnt like to play with anything else. He really frustrates us with his repetitive questions, balloons and antisocial behavior.

Please tell me if this is normal or not.

Answer 1

Although there is the chance for autism more than likely the bustle of activities at school and what the other children are doing doesn't interest him. My hubby tells me a story often of when he was in kindergarten. The teacher called his mom because he was underneath of the fish tank looking up into it to see the fish swimming from the bottom. He was curious but the teacher didn't know what to make of it and didn't know how to get him out of there (all she had to do was ask but didn't think of it or something). This started alot of questions about him autism, adhd, retarded etc. After extensive tests they determined that although he was at a young age he had a very high IQ. He was put into the genius category. Talk to your child's doctor about his behavior. There are tests they can perform that will let you know if your child is just smart and shy or lost upstairs. Good luck, hope he is a genius and not something else.

Answer 2

If you are really concerned talk to the Doctor about it. I have a daughter who is 5. She is the spitting image of her father. Quiet and Antisocial. This was a big concern seeing that she started Kindergarten. SO last summer I took her with me everywhere I went. I praised her for how nice she was when she smiled and said hello to people who asked her questions. I continuously told her that she need to begin responding to people because it was polite. Start with something simple such as a smile or nod. Many people will comment on how "shy" they are, but I always correct them by saying "no not shy, she is quiet". There really is a big difference. (I am big on positive self talk)
When she started school it took some time, but she absolutely loves it. She has many friends, but is quiet around big groups of them. She participates in things now (things she wouldn't have last summer). I hope this all makes sense. I just suggest you really work with him. Get him into more situations where you are in public. Prompt him and encourage him...and don't forget to praise him! This way you can show him how to be polite. Tell him what to say or show him how to nod or wave or smile. Some people might say "that's just how he is and you can't change it." Well the truth is not that we are trying to change it, we are just trying to help our children open up a little more and be more comfortable. It is much easier to train up a child rather than try to correct an adults ways. (I even had to work with her right before school pictures. We practiced how she was going to smile only because she never smiles for anyone taking her picture but us....and would you believe when we got the pictures back she had a beautiful huge smile!! I was so proud of her!) Hope this helps.

Answer 3

The repetitive questions may just be a habit. My son went through the same thing. I finally told I wasn't going to answer him any more when he asked the same question. Engage him in other conversation, he's probably just wanting to visit with you too. As far as antisocial - he's probably not. He's probably just interested in other things, sounds like he's just a bright kid to me. Antisocial behavior is not just not wanting to socialize, some kids are just less social than others.

Answer 4

Is he happy looking at the clouds instead of playing with the other kids? cuz if so then i don't think you need to worry. He's probably just very introverted. we introverts like to spend time alone. when I was a kid I used to organize the other kids into a game, then sit and watch them play or I'd draw in the dirt. I was very bossy, but very content. it may seem abnormal because most people are extroverted and need to interact frequently with others so when there is a child who enjoys spending time alone he seems odd.

and the repetitive questions: I think he's just looking for consistency. he wants to see if at any given moment you are going to change your answer. this too is normal. children are always testing their environment and the people in it for consistency

Answer 5

Not normal. I would definitely have him evaluated - he has a lot of 'red flags' for autism. He sounds like he's high functioning, so he probably has Aspergers Syndrome - which is a form of autism, where the person has limited social skills and as a child limited play skills. talk to your pediatrician about getting a referral for a neurologist to have him tested.

Answer 6

It sounds to me like your son may have a mild version of autism known as Aspberger's. I would suggest having him evaluated by a doctor. Its nothing to be worried about, as many children with this condition are very intelligent some beyond their years. But the behaviors you described (obsession over certain things, transfixion on certain objects, especially balloons) are trademarks of Aspbergers. The more I re-read your question I am more sure that is what is going on. Children with autism are trasfixed or obsessed with certain things. Some times loud noises or changes in routine frighten them. They are very meticulous and repetitive. (more severe condtitions ususally display rocking or other repetitive motions) Chances are your child is entranced by seemingly mundane things (balloons, textures, etc.) I would suggest immediately bringing this to the attention of your doctor or therapist. It doesn't mean theres something "wrong" with your child, he will just have a different approach to life and learning, as I said before, many chlidren with Aspbergers are highly intelligent.
I encourage you to talk to a doctor about this to find out how you can best handle your child and his academics. If you ignore it, you are cheating your child.
I am by no means a doctor, but I have worked with numerous children with autism and this sounds like a textbook example. Check out thesewebsites for more information. best of luck to you!

Answer 7

anti social not a good word ur using for ur child. he is little bit shy. try 2 spend some time with him. parnet s are thje first frinet of chlds. so first u become friendly with him. try 2 cut is video game or tv watching hours. make a time table for his study . and help him with studies. and also tell teacher in his school to help him in studies and take extra care of him. and make sure is is out in games period. and even spy little bit on him and see what he is doing and is there is any progess. and also try 2 friend out tht teacher in the school r friendly or not. if they r too scary that it is matter of concern.

Answer 8

Do you suspect autism? But....if she talk to you a lot, i guess it's not autism. Just keep supporting him to play around with other kids, it takes time for some kids to socialize.

Answer 9

I am very anti - social as well. specially when i am in public.. Like work.... some people are just different... i am sure he is gonna make some real friends... i dont have many friends but i have one or two real friend....

Answer 10

This sounds like something you may want to discuss with your son's doctor. It could be signs of Asperger's Syndrome, for one thing.

http://simple.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asperger's_syndrome