they lying close to me will make the child lean. they say that my body temperature will make the child lean. they tell to leave the child to sleep free without my hug. but my girl is not willing when tell to ly down without hugging me , she starts crying. what to do.
2007-03-04 16:44:49 · 17 answers · asked by raja varsheni 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
Your inlaws sound insane or very ignorant. The most important thing for a child is to feel loved. In fact, cuddling is very important.
2007-03-04 18:01:19 · answer #1 · answered by cassandra 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hello Honey. Not to be rude or anything but in my opinion it is your in laws that are the problem and being around them would be enought to make anyone "lean"!
As always Cassandra has "hit the nail on the head" her advice is right on. Listen to her she is right.
There is no amount of cuddling and physical affection that is "too much", no matter how much you do it, children love it and it is good for them. You can not spoil a child with love. You spoil a child when you try to replace love with material things. Too much love never, ever hurt a child.
I have five children and slept with all of them for varying periods of time. I breastfed them all and it was just so much easier to nurse them at night without getting up. All I did was roll over to change sides. My children have all grown up to be very independent young people and they all slept in theri own beds when it was time, when they were no longer nursing.
Studies have proven over and over again that children that are lavished with love and attention when they are young grow up to be very self assured and confident. You are doing the right thing.
Love and nurture your little girl all you can, before you know it she will be a teenager and the memories that you have of this time with her will be very precious. This is a such a short time in her life.
You are her mother, you do what feels right to you, follow your instincts an don't let anyone change how the two of your feel!
Good luck!
Lady Trinity~
2007-03-06 23:33:22 · answer #2 · answered by Lady Trinity 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If laying next to a person make people lean then most people would be thin.
There is no truth in that, my son will be three at the end of this month. He weighs 40 pounds. That's not lean and he needs to lay down near me most of the time hugging me. Don't stop her from hugging you the time will come soon enough where she isn't going to want to hug mom (teen years).
Enjoy each precious moment because they grow up so fast.
Have a 17 and 18 year old too.
Listen to IN-Laws then ignore.
2007-03-04 18:25:36 · answer #3 · answered by wondermom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my son is only 18 months and he's been co-sleeping with me from birth.. a couple of months ago i ended up in tears over all the comments people (family and otherwise) were giving me about how bad it was etc etc so i went through the most awful month of my life trying to get him to sleep on his own and in his own bed.. and it didn't get better even though i was so consistent that i felt my heart was breaking and breaking every single night. Now he is back in my bed and the first night he was back was the first night in a month that we both slept through the night and now I will never let anybody's comments about what's 'right' for him get to me again because you are your childs mother noone else and if you are happy with it then why should you change it? It's so very true they grow up so so fast and you don't even know where the time went and we have to cherish every single precious moment that we get with them since when they get older they're not even going to want to be seen with us! Stick to your guns and don't let anybody get to you, you do whatever it is that YOU feel is best for you and your child.
2007-03-04 17:16:30 · answer #4 · answered by jarellsmom 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I have a 5 year old boy who hugs and kissed me all the time.I would NOT change it for the world.He already will grow out of it.Why not enjoy ot while it lasts.Your child needs the comfort that she is getting out of it.Don't listen to what other jealous people say.Do what's important for your child.
2007-03-04 18:01:09 · answer #5 · answered by avavu 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is your daughter, it is your job to make her feel safe and this does it for her before she goes to bed. They need to mind their own business. I can't stand nosy in laws. Does she have separation anxiety during any other time. Do you sleep with her all night? I don't get the body temp will make her lean. What the heck is that?
2007-03-04 17:33:12 · answer #6 · answered by brandyswilkes 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Let her cry. She needs to learn to sleep on her own. Unless you want to be sleeping with a 14 year old girl between you and your man someday. And it's not true that teens don't WANT to hug there parents. Mine always welcomed hugs as well as gave them. I could be in my room working on the computer and she would just come in, wrap her arms around my neck and say "Thanks mom" and she never slept with me as a child. It's not the sleeping arrangements that create that, it's the parenting.
2007-03-04 18:31:04 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Tell your in laws to mind their own business. There are a lot of parents who let their children sleep with them. My 3 yr old daughter falls asleep on my bed and I move her to her bed. If she wakes up for anything, I let her crawl back into bed with me. Her and I are on our own now, father no longer in picture. Co sleeping will not make her lean. It is an old wive's tale (and one I have never heard before). Reminds me of my coworker who told me I had to get rid of my cat because she would "take my baby's breath". Load of crap, all of it.
2007-03-04 16:52:04 · answer #8 · answered by Ghost Writer 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
whoever said that that's a bad habit is, well, freakin insane. that child was given to you by god to love,cherish and care for. my goodness, how many adults just want a hug and to lie next to someone as a comfort zone. you are the comfort zone. it wont be long until they are gone and out of the house. cherish it, my friend.
2007-03-04 17:00:17 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Do whatever you think is right for you and the your girl. dont worry about what the in-laws say. If you think it's time to let her sleep alone, that's the time. Dont forget every baby is unique, and they way our parents raised us was a way, but not the only way, and not necessary the right way for your girl.
Just go with your guts!
2007-03-04 16:55:42 · answer #10 · answered by superrod 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋