What would you do? Your best friend asks- and genuinely wants- your opinion about something, but your?

Question

opinion is one that he or she is likely to find quite upsetting. For example, your good friend is an artist and asks your honest estimate of his chances of being successful. You think he is a shockingly bad awful artist who hasn't the slightest chance of success. What would you do?

Answer 1

Tell him that he sucks, but keep practicing.

Answer 2

If you are REALLY talking about art my answer would be to answer them with questions. Artists love to talk about their work and you can probably keep them so busy they will forget that you never gave your oppinion. They will leave very satisfied because all of your questions will be taken as a genuine interest in their work. Here is my sample response to a friend artist with abissmal works:
"What do I think? Well it is working on me on so many levels I don't really know what to say right off the bat. Does it express what you wanted it to? Do you really feel that way about life? How long have you felt that way? How did you choose to express those feelings through these particular images? I find the artist's process so amazing. I can't wait to see more of your work. Do I think it will be commercially successful? That is a tough question because art is so personal. You know a lot of famous artists only became popular after their death. I want you around for a long time, so I hope for your sake it is successful while you are alive! Tell me how you chose the interesting color of the... etc."

-Good luck.

Answer 3

It's all about TACT. I am the worst hypocrite as i am people-pleaser and i do tell a white lie to spare people's feelings... however i have been caught out in the past, when my real opinion has surfaced and i have been accused of lying (even though i am trying to not hurt the person)...

I have the same problem when i tell someone i think they're right about something they've done to upset me (to keep the peace), despite being hurt.. then laterally being caught out when really i did not agree with them, and i get accused of "deliberately arguing with someone and then retracting my opinion and admitting i was wrong".. when the truth be told i never believed that in the beginning and was merely admitted defeat to keep my friendships.

My advice is be honest - the truth hurts, yes, but it is ALWAYS better to be honest. If you think the truth is going to be of a massive detriment to your friend (such as she spirals into depression) then perhaps lay off from being too honest, but overall don't hide the truth. If she's your friend she will respect your opinion, and after all she has ASKED you, so she has to accept your answer.

One way to perhaps ease the pressure of answering is to say ... "Why do you ask if you are a good artist?".. that way it puts the ball in her court and she has to say whether she is doubting her abilities... after all, why ask unless she has doubts or is seeking a compliment to make herself feel better?

It's difficult, but be you :).

Answer 4

i would go with the idea that he sure likes his art work and having something to do that he enjoys is very important.
i would tell him that he could be the greatest artist living today and still not sell one painting. this has happen in the past . look up some info about famous artists most of them did very poorly while they were alive.
i would continue on that route for a time . suggesting ways he might make a living doing something else and still have this art as his passion but one that does not drain him of all his money.
explain that a great artist should earn a living doing something that will earn him enough money to travel the world so he can see things to paint.
all manner of idea's about how sad it is that not everyone sees what he sees when he looks at his art. site examples of modern art that many people ie me think is crap and a waste of time and money . then relate that to his art. tell him how sad it would be if he attempted to make a living from something that just wont pay enough all to end up poor and sad.
this is how i would do it .
i would not go so far as to say the art is crap but just not of a kind that is likely to yeild a good pay cheque.

Answer 5

To be thoroughly trustworthy. there are quite some significant , tasting vegetarian nutrition available. preserving in ideas i'm a meat eater. yet having also sampled some vegetarian nutrition. this may no longer be an argument for you. this isn't about pushing your beliefs onto your friends. Its only learning vegetarians nutrition. growing to be large at making stated nutrition. Dont even talk about that giant nutrition you're making even as friends arrive. only have a good time with their presence and enable them eat the food. Being a vegetarian does no longer negate your ability to understand what tastes large. hence elect the vegetarian nutrition which flavor reliable is all. even if you eat meat is beside the point to the project. a reliable meal is a reliable meal if the flavor is there.

Answer 6

If I were you, I would just keep my answer as simple as possible. (The thing with art is someone out there will like it.)
I don't know anything about selling art so I wouldn't assume anything about my friend's artwork. I would tell my friend to give it his or her best shot. He or she may learn a lot going into it and coming out of it whether the art was sold or not.

I think your friend is more than likely just wanting your support. I think he or she might be feeling intimidated and not so confident. Artwork is personal and it's like putting a piece of you in the spotlight for everyone to pick apart. But, for it to go the other way around? What a feeling!

Answer 7

Tell the truth, but do it tactfully. This isn't particularly difficult when you're speaking on a topic such as art. Simply tell your friend that their art is not to "your taste," but there are all types of successful artists whose works you don't understand (I am certain these statements are absolutely true, even if you happen to be a professional art critic!). Tell them that with hard work and the right promotion, they can do anything they wish to do. So you've helped to support their goals and dreams without lying to them about what you see as their lack of talent.

Answer 8

Well here is the best way out of the situation, Give your opinion in a way that your friend wont take offense to. You could tell them I personally don't know very much about that subject couldn't tell you what to do.

You really don't want to smash their dream unless it is going to be absolutely devastating to the person or some one Else.

There are millions of people and millions of opinions out there so even if you don't like it maybe others will.

Answer 9

My friends don't ask me questions unless they want the honest truth told without tact. It's fault and a gift, what can I say?
If the person is your best friend, and you are a good friend, I think they should expect the truth out of you. You can however guide them in other directions, scoping out other possibilities, helping them think out of the box. You can even divert their attention from you think they want to hear without telling them the hard truth. For instance, if your friend is an artist and wants to know what it his chances are etc, ask him what he knows about the current art industry, ask him what else is out there, ask him what else is popular, and remind him that most artists make it big post-humously.
If your best friend asks if she looks fat, ask her if she is comfortable with the way she looks. Obviously, if she is asking, she is not. Tell her to change clothes, buy a new outfit, or suggest you both try to get in shape.
If your best friend asks if you think his/her boyfriend/spouse etc is cheating on her, ask for the evidence, ask ehr what she thinks, remind her that it is best to confront the issue instead of specualting, causing doubt and anger.
I think you get the picture. Good to see you. It's been a while since I was on here. It's changed a lot.

Answer 10

If the artist thing is really what we're talking about here, I'd suggest he/she try it for a while and see if there is a market for that type of art.
BUT they better plan something to make a living, as artists historically have never done well financially until after their death. If pushed for what you think of their "art", be honest.

Answer 11

Scenario: My best friend is a painter and I think his latest still life is unbelievably retarded and low-quality. He wants my opinion.

My solution:

"You could make it, just play your cards right and keep working."

It's true. If he played his hand well and kept working, he could almost certainly improve enough to become a reasonably successful artist.

Friends should be there to support you, even when it means you need a little bullshit.

The truth, nothing but the truth, but not the whole truth.