The past two weekends I've helped to clean and paint my fiance's basement, giving up a lot of my freetime in the process. Today (Sunday), I finished the painting while she was at work. Before I left, I had a snack, browsed the newspaper, then rinsed off my dishes, and put them in the sink. After that, I went home. Later that evening after she got home, she called me up. At first she thanked me for the work I had done on her house, but then she started to tell me how much it bothered her that I had not just done the dishes (there were about 4 in the sink total) and that I hadn't thrown out the paper when I was done reading it. Despite the fact that she said it in a nice way, it sort of ticked me off. This discussion eventually grew into a full blown argument. I felt hurt that she would complain about such small issues after I had put in so much work on her place the past few weeks. She feels that I am not cleaning up after myself...
2007-03-04 13:59:13 · 17 answers · asked by George C 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
i think she's too picky, i can't believe she yelled at you after you helped her!
2007-03-04 14:03:28 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
I think that she's being a little too picky. After all you painted her basement! It's not like you just went there to make a mess then leave! Maybe she had a bad day at work. On the other hand thou do you always do this cos it might seem like a small issue but it might have been bothering her for a while and this last time has just set her off. You should talk to her, calmly bout it and see how you go from there.
2007-03-04 22:11:39 · answer #2 · answered by iguana_papas 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all, you are a brillaint boyfriend and husband! i cannot imagine any guys would do that... (painting and so on)
i can think of few possible reasons such as you have been too nice to her and she forgot to thank you. take it for granted. or she just being very honest.
you know about woman, yes, i admit that we tend to care very very tiny things. and the most of the guy dont understand why i am so upset about this tiny matter. ok. maybe. but the fact that i upset is true no matter how small it is. we shouldnt argue about how small it is using our own judgement because we never understand. we are all different.
hope you can accept how she is and be honest. and you should be honest to her that you were hurt. telling each other's feeling is only way to understand. and hope she can understand how you feel... because she cares and you care!
2007-03-04 22:38:01 · answer #3 · answered by honeycoco23 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
George - you sound like a nice guy! I myself am a clean freak also and my husband is a slob - however, I know that he's a slob and just deal with it because he is such a great guy. Maybe she had a bad day at work and just took it out on you. Everyone has flaws - I'm sure there are a few things about your fiancee that drive you crazy - but you just deal with them. Life is too short to fight about you being a slob.
2007-03-04 22:06:10 · answer #4 · answered by hotmomma 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I would be upset too.
How are you to know to throw the paper out when you are finished reading it.
At least you rinsed your dishes off and left them in the sink instead of around her house.
I don't think that she really appreciates the effort that you have put in to painting her basement for her - maybe she just expects you to do it cos ur her bf.
I wouldn't be so helpful in the future.
2007-03-04 22:06:47 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
even if you are helping her clean and paint.. she doesn't want to feel the "wife" roles yet and that you are Already taking her for granted.. before you are married. she probably figures if you are doing little things like that now, then you'll keep doing them and even worse once you are married. if you eat her food, then the least you can do is clean up after yourself. you also want to be careful, because if you keep doing that and you know it bugs her, she could drastically realize that this bugs her enough to call off your marriage. She could also, though, just be picking at things like this, if your wedding is nearing... because she is starting to get cold feet and second guess things.. so she may just be over irrationalizing. so i would talk to her about it.. sure you helped her out, but that doesn't give you the right to be a slob so that she can clean up after you... You OFFERED to help...
2007-03-04 22:06:30 · answer #6 · answered by coolio 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
kinda sounds to me like the really appreciated that you finished painting on your own, and helped her out, but that she didn't like that you just made yourself at home, when it was really her home. If it comes up you might ask about that day at work. If she had a rough day at work, any little thing might have set her off, like extra work that she wasn't expecting. it might have started out as something that she wasn't really bothering her, but the more she thought about it, the more it bugged her.
I wouldn't try to paint it as black and white, as her being to picky, or you being a slob. I bet there is just more to it.
2007-03-04 22:06:27 · answer #7 · answered by radio_flyer_04 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
To me,she's picky,she shouldn't have got on you about little stuff like that.After all you did gave up your free time so you can help her clean and paint her basement.Right?Okay then,I think you should point it out for her.Tell her how you feel about all this.
2007-03-04 22:11:42 · answer #8 · answered by ? 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
shes to picky i mean i dont make my bf do all the dishes and stuff after hes helped me out with things
2007-03-04 22:08:14 · answer #9 · answered by sunny 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
slob would be if you threw the newspaper on the floor, and didnt rinse off your dishes. she is to picky.
2007-03-04 22:08:03 · answer #10 · answered by smartree16 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
not a slob at all, why can't you just leave a few dishes out after doing all that work for her, she's too picky
2007-03-04 22:04:33 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋