How can I stop by 2-year-old from breastfeeding? He cries uncontrollably if he isn't breastfed?

Answer 1

WOW....dont you think you should have thought about weaning him off a long time ago......two years old is WAY to old to be breastfeeding......he is going to be one hell of a momma's boys when he grows up.....my suggestion is to just stop doing it.....give him tons of solids, real food and make him drink from a cup.....if he gets hungary and thirsty enough he will do it and get over it.....you really screwed up that kid....good job


well to the redneck person down below me......i think breastfeeding is sooooo gross and would never do it........and just because you dont like my opinion doesnt mean you have to insult me....i am a well educated young woman and happen to believe that breastfeeding for soooo long leads to people not being able to function well on their own.....and believe that if you want to breastfeed go ahead but dont do it forever......because eventually it is time for both the parent and the child to grow up and enter the real world and not be stuck on someones breast.......and to your thing with all the famous people.......most of those people that you listed have some sort of problem....if not social, then mental or physical.....look it up.....and besides at least i dont go around and advertise that i am a redneck.......that sure is something to be proud of........you are probably from the south and have like a 3nd grade education so your statement makes sense then.....

Answer 2

You could try playing up the big boy thing now. Tell him that the boobies are for baby's and he isn't a baby anymore.

Try offering him his own "Big Boy Cup" and tell him if he is a good boy that he will get a bed time story or something like that. Only reward him if he is good and uses his big boy cup.

Keep in mind though that you are upsetting a routine, try and replace it with another one... like the bed time story or something similar

And i don't really agree what the others are saying. It's up to the mother and child when the stop breastfeeding, not society. so don't feel upset or like your in the wrong because they don't dictate what is right or wrong.

You have figured out yourself that he has reached the age where you don't want him breastfed anymore. Good on you.

Good luck with everything and if all else fails maybe see your family doctor the may be able to help in some small way which might make a huge difference.

Good Luck

Answer 3

CONGRATS on going this long! That's a wonderful thing. I can't believe the ignorant answers that have preceded this. Two years old is NOT too old to be breastfeeding. As others have said, the WHO recommends it and there are SO many benefits to it. My first 3 all weaned at 1 yr old. It was very sad. But my 4th is still going strong and she will be 2 at the end of the month. Don't feel pressured to wean him. Let him tell you when he wants to be done if that is feasable for you both.

Answer 4

First, you are not doing anything wrong by allowing your son to breastfeed at this age. I breastfed my son until he was almost two. He and I both enjoyed the closeness of it. It is a special bond that you, as a breastfeeding mother, know is very special. However, there are times when it gets to be more of a chore than a special bonding time together. How I stopped breastfeeding my son was to slowy taper off. I would give him a cup instead of allowing him to breastfeed for one feeding, and worked it up until I was only nursing him at naptimes or bedtimes. Then, I dropped one nap, then the other, and finally I dropped bedtime nursing. It was a slow process and I did have to pick back up feedings to later drop again when he got sick, but it worked with very minimal fussing (but yes there was some). Sometimes you will have to engage him in another activity to get him to even consider taking the cup. Maybe reading a book together or playing a game of some sort or even (I hear the rants coming already) let him watch a much loved video. I also tried to make myself "busy" so that he could see that I needed to do the dishes or fold the clothes or some other something that made it clear to him that if he wanted something right then, it would have to be the cup. All that said, keep in mind that at this age, what he may be looking for (and very probably is) is that special time with you. While you are nursing him, you are "ALL HIS" and that is hard to give up. So you also may try telling him that he can't nurse right now, but you will hold and love him while he takes his cup.

As far as all the people saying that you are doing him some sort of injustice - they have no idea the special closeness you have with you son. They also have no idea what kind of time constraint it can really be for a breastfeeding mother. Don't you worry about their opinions. You made a wonderful and healthful (for him and you, too) decision for your son.

Hope some of this helps you. Good luck.

Also, to Paulamari - My son is now 9 years old and is definitely not a "Momma's Boy." What about when breastfeeding was the only option? Would you consider George Washington, Abe Lincoln, General MacArthur, Stephen Austin, JFK, Martin Luther King, Jr. (and on and on and on) momma's boys? There is a saying about one's foot in their mouth. Are you familiar with it? I thought you would be.

Answer 5

You are an amazing Mother for giving your baby the best. He obviously still needs to breastfeed.

I am very upset by how many MISINFORMED people are saying 2 is too old-and shaming you for it. Please don't listen to their ignorance. What you are doing is NORMAL and HEALTHY. Weaning before this age is actually depriving children (I realize some kids wean early). The Canadian government recommends breastfeeding until the age of 2 at least. Of course these babies still eat other food, but there are good things in the breastmilk until 2 and beyond.

I tried to wean my first baby when he was two--I made a big event out of it and he seemed to understand, but sure enough, when we got home that night he wanted to nurse as usual. I tried to wean him over a few days, but he got so upset that it was clearly still very important to him. So I just shortened the length of the nurse--some Moms sing the alphabet song or something and that's all the baby gets (if it's just a comfort thing). Other Moms tell their babies the milk is all gone--some even put bandaids on their nipples!

My first baby still asked for milk until he was 3 (by then it was just a few seconds), and today he is a happy, smart, outgoing and independent boy--very popular in his class. Not a "dork" as one very misinformed and insensitive person answered.

You have probably already been given good links, but check out La Leche League for ideas and support.

Good luck. You should feel proud that you are giving your son the best. He is a lucky lucky person!

Answer 6

Parenting a two year old is not easy at the best of times. The people who answered you and mentioned that "breastfeeding to two years and beyond" was recommended were quoting from an internationally recognized World Health Organization (WHO) statement which recognizes the importance of long-term breastfeeding. You can find out more about what they say about breastfeeding on the Net.

It is indeed sad to see such negative answers from people who are culturally or socially biased against long-term breastfeeding.

If you want good, up-to-date information about why it's good for baby/toddler (immunologically, physically, emotionally, intellectually--higher IQ!!) AND for mom (lessens risk of breast and reproductive cancers, gets the child to calm down or go to sleep much faster [think of the things you would have to do if you didn't have breastfeeding to help you do this!], helps mom lose weight), seek out your local La Leche League group and ask its Leaders for answers to your questions, including how to wean. You might just find support which allows you to continue a little longer, if it's really outside pressure you're experiencing.

If following your heart does mean weaning, then "gradually, and with love," dropping one feeding at a time, spaced over time, leaving the last feed at night and first feed in the morning until last. This enables the best weaning scenario for both mom and child.

Good luck!

Answer 7

First of all, I'm glad to see that there are some educated people on here who are actually congratulating you on making it to two years. Every health organization in the world recognizes the benefits of nursing until at least the second birthday. And I know it can be difficult, especially in the midst of so many uninformed people who think you are scarring your child instead of nurturing him. It is downright maddening to see the kinds of responses you've gotten thus far from people who clearly are resorting to what they think they know instead of what is true and what the research says. I'm still breastfeeding my son at 14 months and I really hope to make it to his second birthday!

I put a couple of links below about weaning. Please don't wean based on other people's opinions about nursing. If it is what you want to do, then do it, but don't let other people tell you that you shouldn't be nursing him anymore. Child-led weaning can be much less stressful if it is an option for you. Good luck and if you need more support or help, please don't hesitate to e-mail me!

Answer 8

Congrats on nursing this long, which by the way is the MINIMUM recommended by the World Health Organization and some other health organizations worldwide.

First of all I just want to say that you do NOT have to wean if you don't want to. There is absolutely no medical, mental, developmental etc reason to do so. The only reason to do so is because you really desire to. You should also be aware that very soon he will probably cut back to 1-3 nursings a day, and most kids self wean by age three. If you wait there will be NO tears.

And there are tonnes of benefits for baby and mom for continuing to nurse. Everything from nutrition, to reduced cancer risk for mom. A short list of the benefits can be found here:
http://www.kellymom.com/bf/bfextended/ebf-benefits.html
http://www.kellymom.com/bf/bfextended/ebf-refs.html
http://parenting.ivillage.com/tp/tpweaning/0,,3x5j,00.html

If you wish to wean partially or completely many gentle ways of doing so can be found here:
http://www.kellymom.com/bf/weaning/index.html

Answer 9

Ok well done for breastfeeding for so long. Your doing great.
The dropping feeds slowly is a great way to do it. But if your like me and just feed whenever they need it, it is hard to figure out which feed to drop. Some days my girls would drink heaps and other days only at bedtime. With my first she was easy as she self weaned at about 19 or 20 motnhs.
My second just wouldnt quit. I tried dropping feds, but it didnt work as we didnt have a regular feeding pattern. So I just had to completely stop. I tried not feeding her, she screamed so I gave in. I went and stayed at a friends house for the weekend. She screamed the whole time I was gone. She lost her voice. I did the same thing when my Mum tried that on me when I was little.
In the end I just told her boobie was for babies and she wasnt a baby anymore, and because she was a big girl that boobie had broken. So no more boobie anymore. She was fine with that. No crying no tears nothing. She asked a couple of times for boobie during that week, but I just reminded her that boobie was broken. She was almost 3.

Answer 10

I have a 16 month old that I just weaned a month ago. So I understand what you are going through. It was getting really bad because all she wanted when I carried her or sat her on my lap was to be breastfed. And if I didn't give in she would get angry at me and hit me or throw a temper tantrum. It was time to take her off the breast and I succeeded with my husbands help. Since I breastfed her at bed time, I pretended to go bye, bye and would walk out the door. My husband would take her to bed. She would scream and cry, I felt so bad. But then I would hear my husband play peek a boo with her and she would laugh and calm down. Soon my husband would turn off the lights and he would snuggle with her and take deep breaths. Soon she was doing it too and it would relax her and she would fall asleep. We did this for a two weeks untill she forgot about breast feeding. On my part I eliminated the times (one by one) I breast fed her during the day until my body adusted. She has gotten used to my husband taking her to bed. She only cries for five minutes and then she falls asleep. I can finally say that now I get a full night sleep because she doesn't wake up expecting to be breastfed so she could go back to sleep. During the day I make sure I offer her two to three sippy cups of milk or water and make sure she gets enough to eat at breakfast, lunch, snacks, and dinner. I'm happy now that she is weaned because I can cuddle with her and carry her with out her pulling on my shirt and sticking her little hand down my shirt and asking to be breast fed. Good luck.

Answer 11

You will need to start by dropping one of the nursings and then reducing the time you allow him to nurse the other times. Everyday make the times he can nurse shorter and shorter and then keep dropping a feeding. After a week you should be down to once or twice a day - make sure to save the most important on for the last that you drop (in my daughters case she needed the bedtime one to fall asleep so that was the last one we dropped). Be prepared for a fight. He will probably continue to pull at your shirt, but try to occupy him with a book or a song. It won't be easy, but it will be worth it. Good luck.