My best friend is getting married in June and I am her MOH. Myself and another girl have been friends with Susan since middle school. The other four girls are friends from when she attended Wellesley.
Jessica and I do not have a huge amount of money and decided to do a spa day for the party in our apartment. It started off well, but the other girls did not help at all. One, Megan, actually told me I should do nails for a living that it was a fitting job for me. The four girls just had Jessica and I do there nails, facials, massages and did not offer to help.
Susan was pretty drunk and I do not think she noticed. We did not want to make a scene, but it was hard given that I was giving massages and taking drink orders all night. Now Megan has mentioned having Jessica and I do this the day of the wedding. I think she is jealous that she is not MOH, but I do not know what to do. Susan seemed genuinely excited by it, but I am not sure I can massage feet and do nails again.
2007-03-04 11:35:09 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
I'd tell Susan that I'd be happy to do what I can for her, since it is her wedding day, but that I really was expecting the other girls to help out more at the bachelorette party (since it was supposed to be more "all about Susan" than the other friends) and I don't particularly want to put myself in that sort of position again since it took away from your fun at the party.
2007-03-04 11:43:16 · answer #1 · answered by Laura Renee 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
as a MOH you dont have an obligation to the rest of the girls, only the bride. Being MOH doesnt require you to be her slave just to be there for her to support her. If you feel like it you can do the brides feet and nails. I suggest you do each others. That will give you some fun quality time with your friend before she ties the knot....Tell your bride to be your thoughts. if she truly is your friend she will appreciate your honestly....whatever you do dont let those other girls ruin your spirit. This is supposed to be fun for you too. You have been chosen by the bride because she cares and thinks alto about you . The last thing you want to do is make a scene. Keep your cool.
2007-03-04 11:50:17 · answer #2 · answered by rondalaurell 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would sit down and have a heart to heart with Susan. That is NOT right. Those girls treated you like a hired servant, and so did Susan, even if she didnt mean to. Its ok to speak up for yourself, even in a situation that involves your best friends wedding. Being a good friend doesnt give people the right to walk all over you. Susan is your best friend, she will more than likely be extremely upset that you were made to feel inferior or badly in any way and will quickly nip it in the bud. But you will have to talk to her about it to have any action on her part taken, remember she isnt a mind reader and wont know how you are feeling unless you say something. Be gentle but firm about how you are feeling and tell her that you are not comfortable with doing spa treatments for her wedding party.
Good luck to you.
ETA: This post has been bothering me for the last hour. Honestly, if I ever made my best friend feel the way that you do, I would just be devistated and do anything in my power to right the situation. You really need to speak to her. You are her MOH, she no doubt loves you and your friendship more than anything, believe me she wants you to be just as thrilled as she is.
I would love it if you were able to give us an update of how everything turned out. Good luck.
2007-03-04 11:45:58 · answer #3 · answered by kateqd30 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hmm...this is a tough situation. I would try to talk to Susan privately and explain to her your feelings. I should not be you and Jessica's job to provide "spa services" to the rest of the bridal party on the day of wedding. It sound like Susan does not know how you feel or how things "really went down". I think by explaining this to her tactfully she would be very understanding. I'm sure you could think of something nice to do the day of the wedding other than cater to the other bridesmaids. Good luck!
2007-03-04 13:13:57 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm confused on the names...is Susan the one getting married or is she the one jelous that you are the MOH?
Either way, this sounds very frustrating. At this point, just make some suggestions to the bride and have a great wedding.
2007-03-04 11:42:22 · answer #5 · answered by matthaumschild 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be there for the bride, it's her day. Bachelorette parties and all the events before the wedding can get nasty. Luckily at my bachelorette party nobody told me the problems that were happening between bridesmaids and friends. Fights happened between them before and after the party. As long as your there for the bride on her day. After everything is done and she's been back from honeymoon for awhile, you could let her know what happened and then you can sort it out.
2007-03-04 16:32:46 · answer #6 · answered by Jammom10 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just keep it real. Tell her you don't think its a good idea being that you both are going to be doing all the work. Tell her that it is her special day and she is the one that should be getting pampered. Suggest a nice luncheon instead but just do horderves so that no one will have to do too much. And have it prepared already so you can both sit down and enjoy each other's company. LOL.
2007-03-04 12:25:10 · answer #7 · answered by shorty2002 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take the bride aside and confide in her that you contracted a highly contagious finger nail fungus and that you would just hate to put all these new friends at risk.
2007-03-04 13:51:39 · answer #8 · answered by funschooling m 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would just do it for the bride, or I would tell them that you think it's not a good idea especially since you all are there to relax and have fun with the bride.
2007-03-04 12:21:08 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do it for the bride only, if you want to. Absolutely do not give in to these other girls who are trying to more or less force you to do it for everyone. You do not owe them anything. You really don't owe the bride anything else either except your presence & good wishes on "her" day. That is why I said IF you want to.
2007-03-04 11:48:56 · answer #10 · answered by mazell41 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋