My bf (soon to be fiance) has a younger sister who is already engaged and planning on getting married in fall of 2008 (no specific date yet). My bf and I were thinking of getting married in spring of 2008. Since his sister got engaged before us, is it ok to get married before them, particularly in the same calendar year? Is there any etiquette rule about this?
2007-03-04 09:06:08 · 17 answers · asked by Galaxie Girl 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
I would give your future sister a call (maybe once your engagement is official) and see what she thinks of the idea. I don't think there is any formal rule about it, but it would be nice to make sure that there won't be any hurt feelings.
2007-03-04 12:00:57 · answer #1 · answered by Obi_San 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is fine. Just because someone gets engaged first does not mean they have to be married first. Also just because some one gets married that year does not mean that year is off for other people to get married.
Have your spring wedding and she can have her fall wedding. Both will be lovely. It only gets sticky if it is in the same month, people may not be able to attend both. Although that is not an etiquette problem as so much a logistics problem.
2007-03-04 09:13:03 · answer #2 · answered by Poppet 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't know about an etiquette rule, but to be honest, I think it's rude. You really are stealing her thunder by getting married in the same year--and before her, no less. Why can't you wait until spring of '09? She got engaged first, she gets first claim on the date.
It's not fair to his sister to try and plan a wedding in the same year, and even more, it's not fair to his parents who already have a lot going on with helping to plan his sisters wedding to have them help plan your wedding in the same year, as well.
Think how you would feel if your sister or brother decided to get married in the same year as you, before you, when you got engaged first.
Think about how you would feel. It's not fair and it's not right!
2007-03-04 10:35:39 · answer #3 · answered by ms. teacher ft 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
There are no rules saying family members can't get married in the same year or even month for that matter. I'd just mention to his sister that you are thinking on getting married in the Spring, maybe make it early Spring and they can make theirs late Fall. The only problem I can see is the money part of the parents unless your guy isn't going to need money from his parents.
2007-03-04 09:35:36 · answer #4 · answered by Kitikat 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's fine....as long as you space it out a few month and it looks like you are planning that. My sister got engaged 3 weeks before I did and her wedding is July 07 and mine is Oct 07. This way she has a summer feel and I have fall. Since we are both eachothers maid of honor, our "events" are far enough apart that nothing interferes. Its actually been kind of fun planning our weddings together. The only thing I've learned is to keep my mouth shut on any great ideas that I have for our reception. She'll say "I was thinking of doing that same thing" and with her wedding before mine, it frusturates me. Best of luck to you!
2007-03-04 09:15:34 · answer #5 · answered by NoTurningBackNow 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My brother and his wife were "married" last year, in a quick ceremony. My fiance and I got engaged a year after their marriage and planned our wedding for June 23.
My brother and his wife are having a bigger wedding in May of this year, one month before my wedding.
While I was a little put out that I had started planning my wedding last year and chose this date, and they decided to "steal our thunder," I got over it only because our wedding is going to be much nicer (not to be a jerk, it's just going to be really nice since my fiance is an only child).
In my opinion, it's okay, since it's not like you're going to have your wedding right before theirs. The several months of seperation should make it fine.
2007-03-04 09:13:59 · answer #6 · answered by RaginCajun 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is not to scare you or something. i came from the Philippines (i'm now in Canada) and in our culture, they say its badluck for you and your sister or brother if you get married in the same calendar year. they say that something bad will happen to both of you so one of you should change the wedding date/year.
my fiance and i were supposed to get married next year. but mys sister and her husband took our year so we've decided to get married 2007. my sister and her husband had a small ceremony (she was pregnant - 2005) it was just a civil wedding and they only invited relatives. they will be having a church wedding 2008.
we're just trying to be safe here so my fiance and i are getting married this year instead of 2008.
2007-03-04 11:28:25 · answer #7 · answered by Chelsea's Momi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just don't get married in the same month that may make some complications with quests. If you want to marry in Spring and her in Fall it should be OK..Maybe if it will make you feel better talk to her about it make sure she wont be to upset with the plans.
Good Luck!!!
2007-03-04 10:46:32 · answer #8 · answered by fobfanlovesgreg 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My husband and I got married in March 2005 and his sister got married in August 2005. I was not offended when she picked her date (we were engaged first). We were just happy to be able to plan the weddings together!!! It was a nice bonding time for my sister-in-law and I.
2007-03-04 09:12:06 · answer #9 · answered by Level Headed, I hope 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
there are no familial ettiquette rules regarding marriages in the same year.
i got engaged june 2006. set the date for 07/07/07. my 1st cousin decided he wanted to get married 02/14. i was allright with it. it wasnt my wedding.
plan ur wedding.
2007-03-04 11:00:09 · answer #10 · answered by ray g 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋