Im a 16 stone size 18 22 year old, i have never had a serious relationship and have real confidence problems i.e. - i have none! How do i learn to love the plus size me in a size 0 world? AND how many men actually find size 18s' attractive?
2007-03-04 06:46:51 · 20 answers · asked by Lady B 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
BTW - I do go to the gym
2007-03-04 06:57:14 · update #1
im 16 and im size 18. so i suffer too, but i dunno. i deal with it and i try to work it out. but i always fail. nonethless, jiggly jiggly all the way
portly pppl rule!
2007-03-04 06:58:13 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I know exactly how you feel. I'm a size 20, 15 stone girl. I have no confidence and I just feel so sad when I see all the girls on the telly and or the magazines. They say you can only be successful at dieting if you love yourself before you start, but surely if you loved yourself in the first place you wouldn't want to diet?!
What I've tried to do is take a long hard look at myself in the mirror (its scary i know) and try and identify my good points. Its hard but i decided I like my eyes and hair. So I'm trying to flaunt them!!
To be completely honest I have been very lucky in finding a bf. He's a lovely man. You'll find your Mr Right. Honestly you will.
I know its easy to say but try to ignore the idiots who go on looks. I know its difficult cos the hurt cuts deep. Just try to keep your head up. Going to the gym is a good idea, excercise makes us feel happy and glad we've done it.
Best of luck with everything mate. Not all guys are obsessed with stick insects *hug* Take care
2007-03-08 13:38:36 · answer #2 · answered by lady_vetinari 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In my mind a size 18 is not plus size! I'm a big girl (much bigger than you) and my husband loves me for who I am. When I met him I was with a very good friend, and we were having a good time. I wasn't looking for a bloke, we were just out having a drink. My hubby saw that I was fun, and had a good sense of humour and we hit it off from there. He's not overweight, and does not have an issue with mine.
My advice to you is, find a good mate (if you don;t already have one) and spend a few months just going out and enjoying yourself, go for meals, drinks, dancing, whatever you like .... there is one condition ...... don't look for men. If you are not looking and just having fun it is strange how you attract them like bees to a honey pot.
You are only 22, live a little, enjoy being 22 and single and soon you'll be half of a couple!
Good Luck.
2007-03-04 14:55:24 · answer #3 · answered by Leah 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You're not gonna want to hear what I have to say but I'm gonna say it anyway. Don't love yourself at that weight. It's gross. You're hurting your heart and you're at serious risk of all sorts of long-term illness. No matter what height you are, 16 stone is obese. Get on a diet and change your life. You're only 22 - you've got forever ahead of you. I wish I had followed these words of wisdom when I was your age. Instead I didn't lose weight until I was in my mid-30s and I'd already lost the best years of my life. Trust me - you'll feel a million times better about yourself if you ditch the weight. Oh, and I'll add that very few men find size 18s attractive - would you find a fat, sweaty 20 stone man attractive? I don't think so ...
2007-03-04 15:13:49 · answer #4 · answered by Away With The Fairies 7 · 0⤊ 3⤋
What people usually forget about big girls is that they have great boobs and bums.
Try focussing on the stuff that you do like. For example, are you tall, do you have straight white teeth, smooth skin, shiny hair?
Once you can appreciate that attractiveness is a package, and big girls have a lot more of it, you'll feel more confident and then people will start taking an interest.
I'm a big girl myself, and what I've noticed is that, although a man may fantasise about Natalie Portman or Naomi Campbell, he'd rather spend time with a confident, bright, funny girl who is not constantly moaning about her weight/self-esteem.
Plus, as before, great boobs!
2007-03-08 09:34:40 · answer #5 · answered by Jugular 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is not about a man! It is about you and how you feel about yourself. You have to feel inner beauty and confidence before any man will. Your happiness should not be based upon whether a man is going to view you as attractive. Obviously, you have a problem with your self image. You need to work on your body image for you. Once you treat yourself to healthy living, diet and exercise, you Will begin to have a better confidence level within you. Remember, it's not about a MAN! It's about you!
2007-03-04 14:55:53 · answer #6 · answered by ~Secretrose~ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People in general are more turned off by other things such as untidy appearance, bad dress sense, obnoxious behaviour etc. Not everyone out there is looking for a quick lay nor are they looking for a stick insect. If you dressed up and went out feeling good about yourself then you may be surprised. There are lots of guys who prefer bigger people and if you smile, laugh, converse etc. with others then you may surprise yourself even more
2007-03-04 17:07:11 · answer #7 · answered by pete the panda 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do things for yourself that make you feel good about you besides why should anyone else love you if you don't first love yourself. I too was in the same place when I was younger but once I started to shop for things that made me feel good I started to feel better about myself. I also made it my goal to find five things that I love about my body and just play those things up. It's worked for me and will work for you.No matter what size you are you should love yourself. Ignore anyone who would tell you otherwise. Love you and soon they will too.
2007-03-06 19:41:51 · answer #8 · answered by m W 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Im big 2. maybe u cood do more to lose wieght but any decent man can look past ur size and love u for ur personality. confidence grows with age. if it helps forget about ur size when u dont feel confident. i am also big but i dont let it worry u,. go out and live ur life. nobody wants a stick insect!!
2007-03-04 15:09:48 · answer #9 · answered by elz p 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I've always been on the big side and it has never been any bother to me.If you are size 18 and looking for a bit of a kid forget it.Look for a proper chap with a bit of meat on him and fire the size 'o' into their misruable fantasy world where they belong.
2007-03-04 15:01:42 · answer #10 · answered by Xtine 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
although I am slimmer I do find myself worrying about body image and that can really bring your spirits down, attend an acting class and try yoga, feeling good on the inside really helps the outside plus, you get fit, really. I think men do like fuller figures, especially were I come from, Africa
2007-03-04 15:01:40 · answer #11 · answered by Bangi 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋