Why has my ex contacted me?

Question

My ex of 8 mths broke up with me 1 mth ago. That was probably for the best because she was adamant her unhapiness over the previous 1 mth was caused by our relationship. That coincided with her suffering from depression which I thought was causing her to be negative about us. She refused to accept this despite her dr saying she was depressed, giving her meds & referring her for counselling (which she says she won't do).

I decided to give her some space and haven't contacted her for 4 wks. I was planning on contacting her this week. However, she has txted me saying hi & asking how I am and said that she is aware she owes me money for various things we had planned e.g. a gig which has already happened & I went too & a trip, and has asked if she should ring me "to make arrangements"?? I am not really bothered about money!

Is this her offering a way back or genuinely just about the money?

I want to try & get her back but know if I push too much she will pull away

Any thoughts?

Answer 1

Reading some of your previous questions, i think its best that the two of you said your goodbyes and get on with your lives.
You are just going to keep going around in circles.

Answer 2

If you have moved on since the split then it will not work to go back into a bad relationship. Both of you will always refer to things that happened previously and this will undermine your 'new' relationship. Your ex may be feeling better and depression can happen to anyone, but only you can decide if you want to take the chance again or get on with your life. Eight months is a short time to know someone, but I'm sure you have a good idea of what your ex is really like so you will know if this will happen again, or whether she is more comfortable having you as a crutch to hold on to.

Answer 3

Based from your story, I think the girl's in shambles! But I think it wasn't about the money though. I think it's more than that. She might have missed you because she might still have feelings for you since you two were in cool off mode and haven't contacted each other for a month. It's natural for her to act that way, especially since she has some sort of issues. If that's her way of offering a way back, she might be taking it slowly. If not, she might just miss you, but I think it's more of that. I think she still does have feelings for you. Anyways, if you want her back, don't rush things. Do it like, "back to square one", or something like that. Feel the situation first to see what you're gonna do next. If you really do want her back, do whatever you can but you should be strong in case she pulls back. Be prepared on what's to come. Fight for it, but take it slowly.

Answer 4

Just text her back and ask how she is doing, don't mention money or how you feel. If you show that you are concerned about her with no other strings attached for calling, she may see that you really care. Of course if she is self centered then she won't notice in which case she may not be worth the effort.

Answer 5

Hi there

Who really knows whether its about the money or not I would tread very carefully when opening up old wounds. If you still care for this person then let them do the chasing and don't put any ideas into their head. Let them provide the answers which in time they will.


Regards

idai

Answer 6

How about taking a indirect bullet and texting her back saying "Hi (her name) i'm not bothered about money - im more bothered about how you are getting on"

invites her to talk to you - tells her you have more feelings than just financial - and builds a bridge.

I don't know - worth a try?

Answer 7

C'mon "ese" She found her mine of gold and She don't want to loose'it.

Answer 8

maybe she like to have someone to talk to? sorry i didn't read your whole question though.

Answer 9

u never know until you try my dear... you've got nothing to lose