Wedding advise?

Question

My partner and I want to get married next year. We would like a civil service late afternoon, going staight into an evening buffet (really dont want sit down meal too). If I miss out the sit down meal I am going to bypass some of the main feature of a wedding day such as speaches and toasts. We are thinking of booking a local manor house who will cater for the sevice and the evening do. Has anyone got any suggestions on how to fit speeches etc into the evening do without it seeming tacky "drunk dad on the stage" kind of thing? Also the only problem with the whole "manor house" idea is that they do not offer a particularly appetizing buffet- its a very basic batches, sausage rolls and cheese and tomato pizza- some nicer things are available at an extra cost per head but considering I am not having a meal I would have hoped for something nicer as my buffet options? I am wondering if I shoud just do reg office and book hall and caterers seperately? Please advise peeps!? xx

Money not really an issue I just would rather spend the extra on a nice honeymoon. Plus we have been together for nearly 8 years and have 2 kids so it's not all that magical anymore, we have just been putting it off for too long! I hate the sit down meal idea and travelling between venues is a ball ache too!

Answer 1

Advice :- Dont do it you crazy fool!!!! Look what has happened to me, lol!
Anyway on a serious note, I personally would book separate venues, i.e reg office then go on to somewhere afterwards. If you have a sort of formal start to your buffet then do the whole party/disco bit you could always do the speeches and bits at the beginning. That way nobody would be canned up (apart from you probably, oh and Dave) and it would be a great start to a very realxed and fun evening for everyone. I think people get far too wound up with tradition and being all hoity toity at weddings. I know someone who got married and cant even name some of the people on her wedding piccies (you know who I mean). All because future mum in law had far too much say in who was invited!
Do the whole day exactly as you both want it and basically be selfish. We spend our entire life doing what others want but this is your day, really enjoy it. I have loads of regrets about my wedding day (shockingly, not who I married though).
I do agree though that there should be a nicer buffet option as you are not having the sit down meal. Lots of places do really nice buffet choices, its a case of looking around mate.
Not been there myself but loads of people recommend The Millers, in Twycross. I know its a bit far out but they do civil services there too.
Whatever you do or wherever you get hitched i'm sure you, partner and luvvly babies will have a great day!
Chat soon missus lady.

Answer 2

The only difference between a buffet and a sit down for a reception is that people get served at one and have to go fix their own plate at the other. There is no reason to miss anything like speeches and toasts and anything else. You just wait until the majority of the guests are off the buffet line and then you have your toasts and speeches and whatever you like. there are more buffet weddings now a days anyway so I dont know where you got the idea that you would miss out with a buffet. Enjoy your reception.

Answer 3

I'd advise you to hire a professional toastmaster - you can probably find one advertising in your phone directory on online (there's a Society of toastmasters). What he will do is make the reception run really well and sort out the speeches, the order of things, etc. It will make a real difference and add a professional touch to the reception.
I doubt you have to accept the manor house's own caterers, though they may prefer it. Check if you can bring in your own caterers and, if you can, then find a catering firm that suits you. Insist on sampling some 'tasters' - always put smoked salmon on the menu, even if you don't like it. People will remember that there was smoked salmon available and it will instantly 'class-up' your event.
Your suggestion about booking everything separately is a good idea and I doubt the manor house will object, especially as they are probably providing the bar service and will want to make their mark-up on the drinks.
Good luck, but please look into mysuggestion of a toastmaster. It makes a heck of a difference and will put your mind at rest!

Answer 4

We wanted to have our ceremony and reception at the same venue as well. We opted for a historic mansion with an excellent reputation and great menus (including buffet). We had a morning wedding with an afternoon brunch buffet reception. For our meal we had assorted bakeries, sliced fruit and berries, gourmet greens with raspberry vinaigrette, french toast with fruit topping, chicken piccata, praline bacon and sausage, o'brien potatoes, green beans almondine, and assorted finger pastries along with our toast and wedding cake. The meal was exceptional and everyone loved the food. So you don't have to skimp on quality to have a buffet and your wedding all in one location. Just keep looking around until you find what you are looking for. You definitely don't want to pick a venue if you are not please with their catering choices. Your wedding should be the most memorable event, so keep looking until you find what you want. But before you begin looking for a new venue see if you can bring in outside caterer first. I would recommend only hiring one caterer who can provide everything you need, otherwise it will become more complicated to coordinate.

Also, just can still have the traditional wedding reception activities when serving a buffet meal if you'd like. We still had toasts, cake cutting, bouquet toss/dedication, etc. You would coordinate these activities throughout the meal just like you would do at a sit down reception.

Answer 5

I have thought about this myself. Just because tradition dictates that the sppeches etc have to be done in the formal reception, you do not have to. I am wondering if you could have a hot buffet, to make it a bit more formal, then after dinner, do the speeches etc. as you would normally. Nobody should be drunk by this point. As long as the DJ has not turned up at that point. Ask the venue for classical music whilst eating, and this will feel like the reception a bit more without having to double the cost.

Answer 6

Ok, ok! Calm down sweetie and know that there is always a fix!

First...Where do you really want the reception? If you really want the manor house then stick with it. Personally, I found that a personal touch is the varible between success and err...not so good. If you're not liking it then change it.

But, if you love it and need back up for the buffet; all you have to ask yourself, "Who of my close family and friends loves and knows how to cook!" Ask them to cater in a loving way. It will make them a very important and lasting contributor to your special day! (send a thank you card!)

For the speeches, tell the people of whom you want to say something to say something...and tell them it should be special! Then you can mainly bypass the corny speeches that come from 8 glasses of wine.

Congrats and I hope you have a perfect day!

Answer 7

My mum had a civil wedding at 4.00pm we all had a toast a few speeches and before you know it was 6.00pm, we had just a buffet, It was really nice.

My sister is getting married in July another civil wedding and she is having a sit down meal about 3 pm and buffet on the night.

I always say the day is about what makes you tick - have what you want to have and don't worry what others think...

Answer 8

I was with my now husband for ten years, marriage was not an issue, then I thought what the heck we have been together all this time, have two lovely kids, why not. It took 6 weeks to arrange and cost a max of £1,000.00 and was a fantastic day. We had a buffet lunch, but it was a bit basic, so I asked the landlord if I bought a whole ham would they cook it, also a large piece of beef, they were centre points in a sum what boring buffet and I made my own wedding cake, it was a bit like the leaning tower of Pizza but went down fine. Just enjoy your day.

Answer 9

Go to http://www.love.allabouthoneymoons.com they can plan any type of trip not just honeymoons and destination weddings. If you tell them what you like and your budget they will plan the perfect trip for you.Best of all if you use there service to book your trip there service is free b/c the fee is paid by the hotel or resort. Thease guys are great for honeymoons. As far as the appetizer question it cant hurt to call a caterer to see what your options are remember this is your day. Don't let the Manor House push you around you are paying the bill.

Answer 10

It seems like you on a strict budget so dont waste money you dont have. As long as you and your partner are together is all that matters and that you share the day with those you love and care about.
Why not have a regitestry office wedding in the afternoon. and booka venue where you can do most of the catering yourselves. I am sure your families and friends would be willing to help out.
You will have plenty of time if you book the registry office late afternoon giving you most of the day to prepare.