my sister in law and her hubby are having a renewal of vows in july..it will be 3 years being married. She wants me to be bridesmaid but I am confused. We really hate each other so why does she want me in the wedding? Also she said that I had 2 buy my own dress about $200 in the color she wants. I thought that the bride was supposed to pay for the bridesmaids and flower girls dress? I did for my wedding. I have no prob paying but the way she said it was rude...I have 2 buy the dress from THAT website in THAT color or I cant be in the wedding...thats how she told me. Also I am having her mom make my 5yr old a dress for the wedding even tho my kid will not BE IN the wedding. Now shes mad! She said to not have her mom make the dress, that my kids can wear whatever even tho its a formal wedding. But her mom really wants to make a dress 4 my kid and has no prob with doing it. So why is she mad for me asking her mom? I still do not know if I want to be bridesmaid yet
2007-03-03 18:10:50 · 8 answers · asked by I hate stupid ppl like you 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
its going to be a big formal wedding with 200 plus ppl there. The whole shebang! She bought herself a real expensive dress but says that she does not want my daughter to dress up?? I dont get it really. She is being mean so I still will deciede if I really want to do this at all. She has a baby 3 yrs that will be the flower girl and she braggs about getting her a really nice dress.
2007-03-03 18:13:33 · update #1
you really didnt ever read this did you?
2007-03-03 18:15:26 · update #2
actually this is my husbands sister and he does not want to go. He really hates her also. She is totally crazy. We thought that she was being stingy with money. Her hubby is a lawyer and makes great money. But she will buy her own mom a $4oo sewing machine for her bday and ask for half the money back after the gift is opened even though her parents can hardly pay their bills.
2007-03-03 18:26:23 · update #3
her mom is really into sewing and loves making the grandkids clothes. SHe will find any excues to make them an outfit. I talked to her mom and she was totally into making a dress and ive explained to her that my kid was not going to be in sister in laws wedding that I just wanted something nice. The bride always has her mom make clothes for her kid...I had her make clothes for my kids lot of times. I did not even mention to her that her mom was making my kids dress because she said to have them dress fancy and I didnt think that where the dress came from would be an issue...her mom mentioned to her about the ideas she had for the dress that she was making my kid and then out of the blue she calls me up and says to call her mom and say I changed my kind about the dress. If I did it would upset her mother so much because she has big plans already and picked out colors and style already.
2007-03-03 18:33:55 · update #4
don't go
2007-03-04 14:19:24 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bridesmaids usually do pay for their dress, but to make such a big deal out of 3 years being married is pretty pathetic for starters. Renewing your vows after three years is easy - try it after 50..then it means something. Sounds to me like your sister-in-law just couldn't get past the first day and move on with her life and has to relive it all again just to be queen for a day again. And based on your description - she hasn't grown up yet either. Thus the big "me" party. Whatever. Just don't give this woman the time of day. What you're doing right now is exactly what she wants - attention is being brought to her. Even for attention hogs, negative attention is something they'll take too. As long as they are at the center of it.
So don't be in the wedding, or do be in the wedding, whatever you want. And yes - bridesmaids traditionally do pay for their own dresses. HOWEVER - she's not the " bride" anymore - this is her rededication ceremony - it's her expense. Flat out. She just needed an excuse for a party about her. I wouldn't be suprised if you got an invitation to a shower in the next couple of weeks - with a registration card. Sad. Just sad. Wonder what you're brother thinks about all this?
2007-03-03 18:22:57 · answer #2 · answered by Stella Bing 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
$200 for a dress for a vow renewal wedding? Wow...I guess you have to go because she's you sister in law, but i would absolutely refuse to be apart of it as a bridesmaid. She sounds like a bridezilla & you are obviously not cloise to each other.
By the way, not that I think you are doing this...but she may think you are somehow making the wedding about your kids by having her mother make the dress for your daughter to wear to the wedding...you may just want to explain to her...hey, Grandma wants to make a dress or have you mother-in-law explain it herself to her daughter. If I were you, I'd show up with the whole family in nothing more than sunday-best clothes...the marriage is 3 years old..why wear new formal clothes to the wedding.
2007-03-03 18:26:35 · answer #3 · answered by superchrisw 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Appreciate the book you wrote about this, but you are missing the BIG point. They are already married! A vow renewal is not a do-over of a wedding! It's just a simple ceremony, usually followed by a dinner for family and close friends over at the couples' home! Something is very wrong here....
2007-03-04 01:24:09 · answer #4 · answered by Lydia 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if she is just renewing her vows then why the heck is she having a big thing for? its only been 3 years? what does she think she is ...a princess? I wouldnt pay anything for a dress. she is already married and just making a big deal for nothing. tell her to celebrate the NORMAL way. go away for a weekend or something. dont invite 200 people over to watch you renew your vows for a 3 years anniversary. wait till 25 years to do that. spoiled little girls these days.
2007-03-04 03:43:40 · answer #5 · answered by Jenn ♥Cadence Jade's mum♥ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pray for her and yourself. What does your family think about the whole thing? She may believe you won't be in the wedding and invited you to be it just for that reason. Surprise her. Be in it and be the best person and most thoughtful person in th wedding party. Never let her see you sweat. Let her mother make the dress. Yes, the bridal party often pays for their own stuff and it is dictated by the bride or in this case, Bridzilla.! Just have fun since you said you can afford it. Just know she isn't through being ugly so be prepared and be nice. Kill her with kindness!!!
2007-03-03 18:18:47 · answer #6 · answered by the Goddess Angel 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
i would assume that your brother is the one that wants you in the wedding. as for paying for the dress, that is the brides maids responsibility in most cases, you were just nice enough to do it for your bridesmaids. if her mom offered to make the dress than i say its ok, why should your sister in law have a say. i think the right thing to do would be to be in the wedding, no matter how you feel about the "bride"
2007-03-03 18:22:19 · answer #7 · answered by l.rahn 2 · 1⤊ 2⤋
I would say you should book a holiday somewher and tel em you cant make it for da wedding! Or tel her you'll be bridesmaid but pitch up in your own outfit. She'll be fuming! Hehehe
2007-03-03 23:05:34 · answer #8 · answered by ღ♥eyeღℓash♥ღ 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋