my poor friend got tested and hers came out positive. and shes just 16. she doesnt want to tell her parents. she wants to have an abortion [which i disagree with] and to top that off, her boyfriend left her.
i think she should go see a doctor and start taking vitamins and follic acid... but if she wants to kill the baby... ehh...
2007-03-03 15:12:51 · 19 answers · asked by Minor Bunny Engine 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
She may think that an abortion will get rid of the problem but it usually causes much guilt and makes the girl feel bad about herself. She needs to talk to her parents now. They will help her to make decisions. She cant get an abortion without her parents consent. So she really has no choice but to tell them.
2007-03-03 15:17:43 · answer #1 · answered by elaeblue 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
She has to tell her parents she has no choice I am pretty sure that a sixteen you have to have consent to have an abortion.
Abortion seems like an easy answer but it comes at a heavy cost. My sister had one at the age of 16 and still to this day has night mares about it.
The best advice I can give you is to be there for your friend and support her what ever her decision is.
This is really best left between the parents and the child. They are the ones who have to live with the decision.
2007-03-03 15:32:26 · answer #2 · answered by angie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off--it's HER choice to get an abortion. It's not yours. It's HER body. It's not yours. You need to SUPPORT her. Not tell her what to do. Perhaps you can take her to a pregnancy help center. They will take special care of her situation and explain all of her options. This even includes how to tell her parents, how to get a doctor's appointment, or how to get an abortion. It's very important that she makes this decision because she want to have the child--not because she's worried about what people think of her. You don't need to agree with a person's choice to support them or be their friend. As far as telling her parents she should go get a blood test done. It's important to make sure she really is pregnant before talking to your parents. When she does know that she is for sure you just have to tell them like it is. It probably won't be easy because I'm guessing it wasn't planned but telling her parents will take a lot of stress away from the situation. Just be there for her and try not to let her decision get in the way of your friendship. Best of Luck!
2007-03-03 15:52:00 · answer #3 · answered by .vato. 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Wow... that colleen is a real witch huh?
Anyway, I REALLY like the advice about you going with her and holding her hand while she tells her parents. Encourage her to do the adult thing and to be brave. It takes a lot of courage to bring a baby into the world alone. Luckily there are a LOT of services to help her. If her parents react badly, there are refuge houses that will take her in and care for her while she is pregnant. They can also set her up with an adoptive family who will pay for all of her medical expenses and maybe even help set her up in a nicer place than just the refuge house.
Let her know that abortion is PAINFUL. It will scar you for life, emotionally and physically. If she aborts the baby, her chances of being able to get pregnant again go down significantly.
Also women who have abortions often GREATLY regret having it done because of all of the guilt and emotional pain they go through.
Be a good friend and support her... talk to her, comfort her, offer to be there when she has to talk to her parents. And BEFORE she goes to talk to her parents make sure to get the numbers of several refuge houses in your area (look online). If things go badly she can head there for a few days to let her parents cool down.
Best of luck,
Sarah
2007-03-03 15:37:53 · answer #4 · answered by RaginCajun 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
When I was 17 I got pregnant. Telling my mom wasn't so hard. Having my mom tell me to have an abortion was harder. She hated the guy that got me pregnant. She hated that the baby would be bi-racial. She knew I was changing the course of my life forever. She talked me into an abortion. I was scared and it seemed like a great idea. The guy was a jerk that cheated on me every chance he got. I just finished highschool. I didn't have any skills. I had no place to live if they kicked me out.
So I did it.
It was the worst decision of my life. I let a doctor take a vacuum with a knife on the end slice up a tiny little baby and suck it from my body in pieces. Has she ever seen a picture of an aborted baby? Maybe she should google abortions and look at some.
He went on to get a bunch of other girls pregnant. I went on to go to college and become a teacher. I now have two beautiful little girls. I often think of the little girl I killed. I see my children laughing, playing, talking, growing....and I can't stop thinking of the PERSON I killed.
She was more than just the blob of cells that I had in my mind. At the time I had my abortion, my baby was fully developed but tiny (16 weeks). She had a brain, a heartbeat, little fingers and toes. She was a PERSON. Not a fetus. Not a blob of cells. Not a tadpole thing. She was a PERSON. And I let someone go inside of me, cut her into little pieces while she was alive. From the moment I heard my children's heartbeats...I understood they were people. They were babies. They were alive!!
Ask her to go to a doctor and let them monitor her so she can hear the heartbeat. Have her go to a park and watch little kids playing. Look at aborted babies on the internet. Read some stuff about women that can't have children of their own.
I knew that I couldn't take care of that baby. I knew that I was too young to be a mom. I knew that the guy that got me pregnant was a loser. I knew that I was going to be looked at and stared at and my mom/dad were going to be sooooo disappointed, angry, and disgusted with me. They may have even kicked me out.
SO I put myself before anything. I put myself before a human being growing inside me. I put myself before a family that would have loved my child. I put myself before anything. Selfishness is such a cancer. It eats at you. It permeates your whole life.
She needs to tell her parents. She needs to contact an adoption agency. I have a cousin and a good friend that both put sons up for adoption the day they were born. They both have contact with their children and they have never regretted their decision EVER. Their sons are happy, loved, and well adjusted.
I have regretted my decision for 22 years now. I still dream about that baby girl. I look at my beautiful babies I have now and I hate myself for doing such a horrible thing to my baby so long ago. And I so hope that my girls NEVER find out what a monster I was once. I hope the only mommy they know is the loving, caring, nurturing, UNSELFISH mommy they know now.
I pray that she doesn't do it.
2007-03-03 15:36:44 · answer #5 · answered by Bubbles 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
just because you believe abortion is wrong doesn't mean she does. it should be her decision and as her friend you shoul dsupport her wahtever she decides. she should think about it carefully and then make a decision, which you should then support no matter what!!!
don't you dare freak on her and say shes killing her own baby blah blah!!! she is well aware of everything. she should go to the doctor either way. + she should talk to her parents but eh(not everyones parents are good parents sorry but its true ) anyway just help her give her all her options adoption, abortuon, keeping baby, but dont try and force her to do something YOU think she should. You are not her!! good luck
2007-03-05 07:21:49 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well my friend, you may have to do something you hate to do. but you got to. because this is something that is very serious your friend is in serious doo doo and has no business having sex well i cant say that b/c i did that early but having unprotected sex that early anyway. Especially while living under mamas and daddys roof when she gets out she can do what she wants. You need to tell her parents for her that'll solve the whole problem and thats what this is a problem. You guys need to be worried about getting into a good college and what to do with your lives after highschool instead of what clothes your going to buy this baby. Life is to short. Tell her folks because she wont and she'll end up getting thrown out of her house and out on the street etc and have a tough time. Tell her parents.
2007-03-03 15:23:50 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh talk her out of an abortion. I was 15 when I got pregnant no I have 2 have little girls. Have her tell her parents about it,it will be hard, but worth it in the end.
2007-03-03 18:50:51 · answer #8 · answered by Michelle 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is going to have to tell her parents one way or the other. She could try writing them a letter and then leave it somewhere that she knows they will find it, that way they can read it and hopefully calm down a little before they talk to her. I personally don't believe in abortions and I think it will be something that she will regret, but that is for her and her parents to decide. She really needs to figure out some way to talk to them about it.
2007-03-03 15:24:11 · answer #9 · answered by precious1too 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
omg i was so sxared to tell my folks i got preggie at 17 was still in scool,home,etc... theey did not find put i was preg till i was 8 monthd i hid it pretty well, but my mom knew mothers always know!!i think if she just lets them know about it now and let them be upset,or happy or what not it is better then hiding it for months like i did my dad was very upset with me i did not tell them sooner they wanted me to have an abortion,but that was just talk until their granddaughter came its always differ when the baby is actually here and their holding it in their arms having a kid is hard work,emotionally,physically,and fiancially make sure she has medicaid or govt assistance of she has no insurance take my advice tell them now or tell ehr to tell them. i moved out with my husband,had to work a full tiem job b/c i was scared of their reaction,but in the end they supported me all the way to this day 5 years ago...
2007-03-03 17:36:15 · answer #10 · answered by k 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋