Is it him or just me?

Question

I've a crush on this guy at school and he asked me out on valentines day. we are now going out but I think he's moving too fast. I want him to hold my hand or maybe even kiss me but that would make things move along faster which I don't want I like slow and think this is too fast but want things to speed up. I'm confusing myeslf and need your advise. Is it him or just me? explain.

Answer 1

talk to him, relation ships are all about COMMUNICATION

Answer 2

If he were to hold your hand or kiss you sometimes...you say that would move things along faster...but you want things to go slow...and feel they're goin to fast but you want to speed things up..hmmmmm You are confused.

Talk to him* Tell him what you want. If you want him to hold your hand or put his arm around you , sometimes kiss you...but you don't want to go all the way. You have to tell him, he can't read your mind....and as you can see in your question...you're all over the map right now giving off alot of different signals...it's like the 4th of July for you right now with what signals you're giving to him. The poor guy doesn't know what you want ....either do you* So sit down, take a deep breath and figure out how slow and how fast you want this to go and TALK TO YOUR BOYFRIEND instead of flaring off like the 4th of July or you'll really be in a phase of confusion for quite sometime* GOODLUCK

Answer 3

I think that they way the world is now, it's easy to get caught up in a relationship where one person wants more than the other, if the right person is with you because you both want the same thing, then there should be nothing to worry about, simply tell him that you want t take things slow and explain the reason why.

I'm sure that this will either make him leave (and that would be for the best) or he would understand and support your decision.

Answer 4

you will soon learn that boys will want to move fast. but i think you yourself know where the boundries should lay. i think a couple of weeks or a month of holding hands and stuff is perfectly normal but sometimes guys don't like that.

Put the cards on the table - diplomatically. And if he respects you then he will agree or come to some sort of medium ground. If not, then you will know how much he values your company. You don't want to give him what he wants, and then a week later see him down the hall chatting up someone else - think of the heart ache then. I would sincerely suggest being a bit cautious now.

i dont think its you - definately him.

Answer 5

It's good that you are even concerning yourself with this. That's a sign of true maturity on your part - awesome! I say talk to him about your concerns. I say decide your boundaries together. Meaning, maybe holding hands and kissing is all you two may decide to do. It may be okay to move to that now, and then you don't have to worry about any other steps, or going any further. Just make sure you decide these things over lunch and not in the heat of any moment. We are less likely to stick to any boundaries once natural tendencies begin to kick in.

Answer 6

Both!

He could slow right up a bit (if he really likes you), and or you could speed up a little, but it sounds as if you are both a little of of step of tune etc. But there is this is nothing new in all of this, do what in your soul, which means do not speeding up too much. but you may be to drive him crazy with desires, but he should wait, but boy is it hard at times! I would say stay with the hand holding which i hope he's comfortable with as it's so nice etc etc... if not more on to someone else, but that may not be easy to do to him!

Bye and best wishes

Answer 7

i think it is u. you have to know what you want, and you should maybe try talking to him about him moving to fast, so then you to can be closer, and then he will kiss you or hold your hand, but don't forget, valentines day was only two weeks ago! it probebly is just hard for you because you liked this guy, so you do want it to speed up even though you think he is too fast.

Answer 8

Don't do anything you are'nt 100% happy with,being forced into things you don't want to do shows no respect .
If the guy likes you for you he would'nt try pushing so much,so be careful don't get drawn in.
All he wants is to be able to tell his mates he has had you,while you could end up pregnant.
Even if he tells you its over if he does'nt get his way,you must do whats right for you.
Good luck and be careful,you have all the time in the world so don't be rushed.

Answer 9

ok so you want to hold hands and kiss that's understandable you still in school so I personally would not take it farther than that.

has he tryed to make any advances yet? like does he hold your hand and give you soft kisses on the cheek things like that.

its not to fast.....its just hand holding but if it is your first kiss you might want to wait until you know you relay like him a lot know what I mean

its hard to help I don't know how many relationships you have had before.

Answer 10

its perfectly normal to "go at different speed". No two people are alike. And no its not him and its not you, its just what happens.

But you need to talk. If he know how fast or slow you want to go then he should be okay with that

Hope it makes sense.

Answer 11

talk to him and tell him what you are comfortable with, don't let anyone pressurise you into doing things you don't feel comfortable with.
if he takes it badly or does try to make you move faster than you want, move on and find someone else because he isn't worth it if he does that.