just to let you know im 16
my parents have been seperated for a year now. and i have found out that my father is a member of many dating agencies. and has met many women. i feel that he shouldnt do this and therefore i deleted all the memberships.
just to let you know that he has always lied and i dont trust him very much. he always says his job doesnt pay enough for luxeries and there he is paying more than £140 on these services. and he always lie's and says he's going to interviews but instead he is visiting women
do you think what i have done is right and what should i do?
2007-03-03 10:15:53 · 9 answers · asked by badmannn 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I really understand what's your heart is telling you. This best way to approach your dad is let him know that you don't trust his words. When he keeps lieing to you it is only because he thinks you believe him and that is what you must stop him from doing, lieing to you.
If it is hard for you to address him verbally then write to a lenghtly letter explaining your thoughts and place it on the door of his bedroom. What you need to know is his intentions about your mom? because if he don't have any intentions of reestablishing his relationship with your mom, it's time for him to move on...
If this the case, then it's ok for him to meet other women. The main factor is you must know the truth! Also you may want to see what's intentions of your mom have for her future as well. I know the best gift is to have your parents back together, but sadly this the hardness of life.
This is lesson on love. You know where your parents went wrong in their relationship. Just assure that when you get married that you plan an everlasting life with your wife. A family that prays together, stays together. Keep your own family in prayers with God!
If you need help writing a letter to your dad let me know. Good luck.
God Bless
P.S.
Contact me, again
2007-03-03 10:49:22 · answer #1 · answered by tony 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are still a minor. He is still your father. What you need to understand is that your father maybe finding the separation painful, and his action may be a way to alleviate that pain. You are idealistic but not necessarily realistic.
Can you not be judgemental? Why not ask him directly if he still loves your mother. Maybe he still does. Maybe he's finding it difficult to cope with the separation.
Unfortunately he does seem to be immature, which may have been the cause of the separation. If he has joined lots of dating agencies it does suggest he is more interested in playing than meeting that someone special.
if you have had to ask whether what you have done is right, then it is not right. What is good needs no justification. Why not just be a son and not an interfering busy body?
2007-03-03 11:09:51 · answer #2 · answered by d00ney 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ali this must have been a shock to you. If you are 16 and I think at your age you need to share this with someone you trust so you don't carry this burden and the hurt you feel on your own. If you can ring up child line and have a chat with someone who understands how hard this is for you. This must be such a worry so don't take it all on your own shoulders. He is responsible for the things he does.
http://www.childline.org.uk/Helpandadvice.asp
2007-03-03 10:37:47 · answer #3 · answered by : 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There is ALWAYS two answer's to that question, don't you think that maybe there was something wrong in the marriage, before your father went off and signed up to agencies
2007-03-03 10:34:13 · answer #4 · answered by minniemix 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, you are a big prove that now kids are incharge of their parents. What you did to him is wrong; your father can do what ever he wants with his life you are nobody to tell him what to do and how to spend his money. What you need to do is support him and be his friend so instead of him liying, he will talk to you and you can give him your opinion and tell him how you really feel.
2007-03-03 10:50:46 · answer #5 · answered by Chivolita 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What he is doing is wrong. He is still married. I don't think you had the right to delete the memberships, though. Maybe you could let them know that he's married.
2007-03-03 10:52:10 · answer #6 · answered by notyou311 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no what you did is not right. Your father, like it or not, is a human being, and he has not only the right to date who ever he wants, but spend his money that he earned on what he wants. He is lying to you to try and protect you, and he is probably embarrassed to admit he is seeing other women. But what do you wan thim to do? Be alone forever? No one likes to think of their parents having sex, but they do do it, and if he spends his money trying to find happiness then that's his business. you come across as a selfish spoilt brat who thinks the world revolves around her. Divorce is very common, you are not the only person to go through it, if you need to talk to someone about how you are feeling, then do so. DONT punish your father for being human.
2007-03-03 10:21:49 · answer #7 · answered by CHARISMA 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Hes a free agent now let him do what he wants,if it was your mother would you do the same?let go of the resentment honey and just enjoy your parents,they have lives too.
2007-03-03 10:37:39 · answer #8 · answered by lees 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
and in another couple of years you won't even be interested as you'll be into women yourself. let him go on his own journey and you on yours. It was extremely wrong of you to interfere with his membership. Grow up
2007-03-04 00:47:26 · answer #9 · answered by Angelfish 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋