My boyfriend is thinking about joining and I need to know what our life will be like. We've been together for 6 years and have a child. The only reason we haven't gotten married is because the timing hasn't been right. Either I'm in school or he is, or some other major thing. We are talking about getting married after he gets out of BT. Anyway, he would like to be stationed in Texas if at all possible. I would like to know what housing is like, how the Navy is, just everything. I have no idea where to start. Thanks!
2007-03-03 07:57:15 · 10 answers · asked by kadensmama3 2 in Politics & Government ➔ Military
You guys have been together 6 years and have a child, you have already been together longer then 1/2 of all military families. Life really depends on what his first command is. If he's on a ship you can expect long hours and at least 1 out of every 4 nights away from each other. We have never been stationed in Texas but in my experience ( 3 duty stations later ) Navy housing for the most part is pretty nice. The best housing in the Navy is in Lemoore Ca. It's really nice ( did a tour in NWS Earle NJ and one in Great lakes IL. ). Deployments are rough but with trust, love a phone and e-mail it gos by really fast. I'm sure that you'll be working or taking care of your child while he's away and you will be forced to keep busy. Night time is the worst for the first month of deployment because you feel lonely, I use to bring my daughter in bed with me but that only made her want to be in my bed all the time even when my husband came home. You will make friends, and every command has whats call an Ombudsman which is the middle man with the command and the spouses, some of them send out weekly newsletters and even have things like support groups and picnics for the families. The military is like one big family, you will never be alone and will always have someone who knows what you're going through. Next to the Air Force the Navy is the safest branch of the military to join, providing his job is not one that will put him in harms way ie; Master at Arms ( Military Police ), Gunners Mate, or even in some cases Hospital Corpsman ( Nurse for the military ) My husband is an IT and has only been to the middle east on a ship and has never been hurt and had never been in harms way. If you have any other questions or concerns please e-mail me. Good luck.
2007-03-03 14:07:10 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let me get this straight. YOU have a child but you didn't get married because 'the timing wasn't right'? "..Or some other 'MAJOR' thing"? Marriage isn't MAJOR? That poor kid, being born to such immature children!
If I were you two, I'd get married. Once he's in the Navy, BOTH YOU AND THE CHILD will be covered medically. If you're not married, you're a non-person. There are other legal things to take into consideration, whether he's in the Navy or not.
Not much Navy in Texas.
Navy housing, compared with the years past, is excellent. The Navy 'takes care of its own.' Commissaries save you a lot if you know how to shop (grow away from the junk foods).
Don't expect to be stationed where you want. You can ASK, but...the needs of the Navy. In 20 years, I got every duty station I asked for (or within a few miles) except one...embassy duty Moscow, USSR...time frame was the main factor). Not all are as fortunate as I was. I had 2 overseas duty stations with my family where I could go home most nights.
Depending on his rate, he could have a school from a few weeks to months. No dependents allowed there except at their own cost. He could get a ship right after school, so plan on getting to know your neighbors and find a way to keep yourself occupied. The Navy isn't for every wife. My wife was a Navy brat, Navy wife and Navy mother (at my last two commands, my troops called my wife MOM). Out of 20 years, the longest I was gone was 13 months(Antarctica..no mail for almost 7 months), 12 months to the Middle East...flag ship, 6 months to the Indian Ocean, 6 months to the Mediterranean (just before I retired). Other than that I was stationed where I could go home every night, except duty days.
Any questions, comments, you are welcome to email me.
(USN/retired)
2007-03-03 16:37:23 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
The Navy is a good place to have a career. My dad was in the Navy for 20 years. There are good benifits. Free medical and allowance for housing. Many base have housing. Being the Navy and like any other military branch you get a little choice but they make the final decision where you will be stationed. Whether a Naval base or aboard a ship for sea duty. There are plenty of traveling opertunity while in the military. You usually have to move about every 2 years. It is a good career to raise a family. You have to be understanding when your husband is away aboard ship. That could be up to 6 months or longer. Some people it is hard for their marriage being away for long period s of time. Base housing was very good from my experience. You can buy things on base at commisaries that are tax free and alot cheaper.
2007-03-03 16:49:11 · answer #3 · answered by roundman84 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
technically, he is considered a single parent, and is therefore ineligible to enlist. He would have to produce a court document stating that he has NO custody whatsoever.
Marriage, if you don't do it before he ships out, would probably have to wait until after A school, as there will be no time between Boot camp and A school for him to take leave, and he is not allwoed toltake during A school(rxcept the last 2 weeks of December when all the schools shut down).
Getting Staioned in TX cannot be guarenteed. where he will get sent will depend on his rating and the Needs of the Navy.
Military life is hard. he will miss birthdays and anniversaries and Holidays. His time will not be his to do with as he pleases, which means you have to roll with the punches as well. It takes avery strong person to be married to a Servicemember. Not everyone can handle the stress.
2007-03-03 17:20:58 · answer #4 · answered by Mrsjvb 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If in 6 years you haven't found time to tie the knot (not the minor thing you seem to have relegated it to) you're not going to like the Navy lifestyle.
It's hectic getting ready for boot camp and afterwards his time is the Navy's. He'll qualify for leave (about 2 days of leave for every month he works) but when he gets to take it depends on what the Navy needs. The timing between boot camp and schools could be very tight not allowing him to come home or he could have plenty of time in between the two. You never know.
Everything in the military is written in pencil and sometimes they don't press very hard so that it can be rescheduled more easily. We've had times where we had to change plane reservations 3 days before leaving on vacation because the schedule changed and so did leave.
I'm not saying you two won't make it as you're still together after 6 years but you need to take control of the things you can if you're going to make it as a military spouse. Plan your wedding before he leaves for boot camp so that the paperwork's done (get the recruiter on it) and you and your child are covered with benefits from the time he leaves. That also qualifies you for a paid move to his school if it's longer than 6 months. It makes it easier than getting married on leave and staying behind to wait for the paperwork to get filed to move or moving on your own dollar and waiting for the paperwork to get money back.
Finally, Texas doesn't have much Navy but if he wants it, ask for it. The Navy detailers try to get people where they want to go as long as the Navy really needs them there. If you don't at least ask, he'll never have a chance of it.
2007-03-04 15:30:59 · answer #5 · answered by Critter 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I was in the Navy and married. You spend 6 months shore duty but go to work on the ship 8 to 10 hours a day. Then every 4 weeks you have week end duty. Note: One spends the week end on ship. Then every 6 months the ship goes overseas for up to 9 months. So he's home for 6 months and gone 9 months. It's a very hard life for a married family.
2007-03-03 16:02:49 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
The Navy is not the best military service for newly weds, especially if you are not already used to the Navy way of life, Like the guy above me said you are gone often. So its up to you to determine if that sounds like the type of life you can live. Joining any branch of the military is going to be hard right now on their spouses with the deployment rate so high, and the time spent in the desert so long! But tell him to look into the air force, they deploy less and for shorter periods of time, and he won't be gone half the year every year!
2007-03-03 16:16:00 · answer #7 · answered by ms.jackson... 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If married to a sailor or soldier, always remember that the military service comes first. This is the code your love one has to live by. If they do anything for their family that violate this code they will pay a penalty that is so severe that even the family will suffer.
If your bf is going to join the service, make sure that he is settled and know where he is headed before you go to the next step. The Arm Forced will change direction on a dime, and the family has to change with it. THAT IS THE WAY IT IS.
2007-03-03 16:22:34 · answer #8 · answered by whatevit 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you're not married, as far as the navy's concerned, you don't exist, remember that.
The navy is made up of sailors, sailors go on ships and ships to to sea.
2007-03-03 20:02:52 · answer #9 · answered by Yak Rider 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
He's going to Sea that's just how the navy is. Unless he flies non sea transportable aircraft or he Knows someone.
2007-03-03 18:49:59 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋