I've been friends with a certain guy for about 6 months now. From the beginning it was clear that there wasn't room for us to be anything more than friends.But then I developed a bit of a crush on him, and eventually that escalated to a point where I got drunk just so I could get my feelings out. Of course, obviously he didn't share those feelings, and so we left it at that. Eventually I tried to break off my contact with him, and stop being friends. But when I came back, we suddenly were OK again, and we got even closer. I am starting to have feelings for him again, but I haven't told him. He's quite a guy and I really love him, like I would any dear friend. When we are together, he makes me feel on top of the world, and is able to lift my spirit no matter what happens.He's like a puppy that you just want to hug forever. It's not likely things will change in our relationship. He's my best friend right. I really can't stand to lose someone so precious, just because of a crush.
2007-03-03 07:19:01 · 11 answers · asked by Ewelina D 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I've been on both sides of this.
love takes many forms. friends can love each other like sister and brother. try to think like that. (as in, "ew. thats my brother")
don't spend too much time with him, don't prioritize him too highly, don't fixate.
above all, stay honest.
But do not make him responsible for your feelings. You must be good at knowing yourself, and taking responsibility for yourself. Example: avoiding others because you're being loyal to him? not healthy. take steps.
remember: if you do things that you wouldn't do for/over just a friend, then when the fixation wears off you'll be mad at him - for something that wasn't his fault.
if/when the feeling gets too strong just take some time away & let it wear off - *before* it gets to you (but let him know you're not mad at him).
he'll understand.
2007-03-03 09:44:34 · answer #1 · answered by netizen 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you ever thought that maybe you don't really have a crush on him?
When you say that he's like a puppy that you just want to hug forever, or that he makes you feel on top of the world, are you sure that those things are the things that doesn't mean love?
I think that you should stay friends, but nothing more. My impression is that you don't love him, but you love the things he does with you and for you. Like everyone, you want to be happy, but even though what he does makes you happy, one day, when you get older, those things won't mean so much to you, and you'll realize that you've made a mistake and spent your life with someone who you in fact don't love truly, for example.
But this is my opinion. Think well again, and don't worry, if you really love him you'll be together.
2007-03-03 07:30:18 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was in a very similar situation like this with my best friend. She's the world to me, and I have a lot of feelings for her, but the only way she sees me is as her best friend. It's really difficult too, because there have been many times that my feelings have put a rift between us. But the biggest thing you have to remember, despite how you feel is that this guy is a great guy, and having him in your life as your friend is a blessing. So when you do something for him, do it for him as his friend. Everything you do for/with him...you just have to focus on the fact that you're friends. Now, that might not make your feeling for him go away, but it's at least going to make things a lot easier.
As far as it stands with me and my best friend, everything is great because we are just the best of friends. And I'm really happy for that. But if at any time her feelings for me were to change...I would be right there.
So it's ok to have feelings for him, just realize that it might never happen, and just be glad that you have such a wonderful friend. And you never know...something could happen down the road.
Just keep being a friend.
2007-03-03 07:30:28 · answer #3 · answered by Jeremy B 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she is unlike that till now according to danger something surpassed off which you don't be attentive to. in specific circumstances each and every little thing have a reason. Why not talked to her in front of the counselor and asked her what's incorrect and if she has a situation somewhat than condemn and despise her. provide her time to open up and supply her understanding because of fact i think of she's in simple terms overlaying up what's surpassed off to her. in specific circumstances people like that doing issues basically a front yet deep interior they be attentive to that they choose some help besides the undeniable fact that it in simple terms so surpassed off that they are in a position to't settle for it to themself.
2016-10-17 04:46:08 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Then focus on being his friend. Try to hang out with other people and see what would from there. Sometimes, those that we fall in love with are our "best friends".
2007-03-03 07:22:53 · answer #5 · answered by babygirl31 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tough for guys and gals to be friends because of this, if you want a guy like this forever, you need a gay guy, because a normal man would always want something more in these cases
2007-03-03 07:25:29 · answer #6 · answered by www.japanvideogames.com 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do your best to save what's more dear to you and what matters more than the other in the long term.
2007-03-03 07:26:30 · answer #7 · answered by ak25 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get a boyfriend and love you friend as a friend.
2007-03-03 07:23:24 · answer #8 · answered by mikey 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if he he can't deal with how you feel then he's not much of a friend
2007-03-03 07:23:49 · answer #9 · answered by zen522 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
instant message me if you want help with this
2007-03-03 07:23:32 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋