i have been with a guy for 1 years and 9 months, but lately all we do is have sex, and we dont go no where like the movies, or out to eat any more, i have never met his mothers or his kids we dont stay togather but he has a key to my house and he has stuff of my house. i have met some of his friends and he sisters and brothers. if ask me to help on out as far as money , i help and dnt even ask for it back, but if he do somthing for me he will hassrass me untill he get it back. MY QUESTIONS: what would you call us? and what should do, find someone new, or what?
2007-03-03 05:07:45 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
id call him a mucher and you stupid for letting him stay
2007-03-03 05:10:14 · answer #1 · answered by Faith 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
In his eyes you are his friend with benefits. After a year of dating you should have met his mother by now, unless shes deceased. His kids too..because after so much time you can only assume he wants be with you longer and for that you need to meet his kids. His sisters and brothers can lie to you or just be nice to you because they know you are helping him. Hes petty because hes taking your money but sweating you for his. I think he has too much access to you. I think you should take the key back or change your locks and tell him you need him to open his heart to you because he has all access to you but you dont to him. If he straightens up fine but if not. Let him go Good luck
2007-03-03 13:15:43 · answer #2 · answered by FauxDr 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have gone through that and we have been going out for 8 yrs now. During your time frame about two years it's feels like that. Although he doesn't harrass me back for money , but I do chip in. I have meet his family.
He sound like he's slacking off, so maybe you can indirectly motivate him. In a relationship I have learn being the independent will stray your man. If you show a little needy, not so annoying but need him feel like a man, he will be a man and provide you with care.
To fill you in, I just found out that my so call trustworthy wonderful boyfriend has been using an escort service for a year. paying like $200-$400 a one hour session haveing bj and sex.
I found out through his save web log in to the website which show he had at least 13 times the past year.
I also found some e-mail exchange to meet some of these girls.
How am I suppose to feel now?
We had arguement that I have been slow at graduating and starting my career track so we could save money and get marry, she said I do alot of useless stuff like joining polictical groups and public service stuff. He say he doesn't feel he is number one but last on the list, I don't satify his sexualy needs because I am tired and he is tired too and wish I can massage him and pleasure him.
I jokly remember saying I don't mind if you go find a girl that would do that for you. If you want to stay with me this is what you are getting. And for long time sake of the realtionship we try to work it out by staying together.
Well it's part my fault but I never though he would be actually doing it behind my back for 13 time for the past year and still want to keep me. He thinks he could have it both ways?
If he knew I was doing that he would kill me in a heat beat , go on a rage killing machine. But he hopes he can keep this secret forever.
Now the decision is I know now should I pretend the rest of my life married to him, have kids and knowing he is having exotic sex weekly?
Or should I confront him and know that trust is broken and the relationship is numb? And he would never do it again and we work it out together?
Or just leave and let him wonder why I leave and let him still pay for sex until he get bore. Would I still return to him?
He is dirty now. I though we were pure. That is why I still stay with him because I though we were the first and will stay the first. But he contaminated himself.
Alot of men are contaminated? Would I have to wonder who were their history partners? Or if they are pure when in a matter of time will they be un pure.
Or it doesn't matter how many people you slept with as long as you with me it's only me?
I found out yesterday, and I know he was surfing the net as I pretend to sleep, then he came to bed and want to get it on. I did but in my head I am thinking of all those girls he slept with, each time he wrote his experience and each time I can feel he is comparing me with his eroticas. AFter we were done, I slept and he watch t.v. I know something is not right. I am the free escort.
Is that what Woman are ultimatley free escorts.? Whatever men can get? If you are skilled you can get women to sleep with you for free.
I am loosing the idealism of love.
If you can I would be interested in hearing your thoughts
2007-03-03 13:30:49 · answer #3 · answered by Confused 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I call this a dysfunction relationship.Because you guys dint have anything in common except for sex and he sounds like he is controlling.You should break up with him and make sure you gave all his stuff to him.You should look for someone new and get to know the person your going to be with if you break up with the person.
2007-03-03 13:14:11 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would call you guys a mistake. My advise is to leave the guy. There are other fishes in the ocean. He's just using you as a sex toy and ATM machine. Get out of this "relationship" fast.
2007-03-03 13:12:24 · answer #5 · answered by TSB 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
it's ovoius you are being used...ummm...the problem is ...if you dump the guy ...(which you should)..you will be constintly get hounded by the ...creep ... there are laws against it but most of the time the law doesn't work...i can only feel sorry for you at this time ..i hope you can get this creep as far away as possible from you ... ummm...it looks by all the answers here ,,you know what to do... do not hesitate to ask for help at any time...you have friends here...thank you for reading this...
gorlitchi
2007-03-03 13:26:09 · answer #6 · answered by tuxedo cat 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't want to look judgmental as I don't know your boyfriend personally but I'd say he sounds incredibly selfish,he doesn't seem really involved in your relationship.But the right question you should ask yourself is "does this relationship bring me happiness?" As you're here asking whether you should stick up with it or move on I'd say you've got your answer...
2007-03-03 13:19:49 · answer #7 · answered by valerie_adele 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is strange.
I wish you had not waited so long in this relationship to just now wonder where you two are. You sound like just a convenience to him, and not a real part of his life.
Maybe you have gotten used to it, and don't want to be alone, which so many women tend to do, sadly.
Find your courage, baby, and find someone who loves YOU, because this loser doesn't sound like he does.
2007-03-03 13:17:27 · answer #8 · answered by outtahere2day 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you need to ask yourself if you have a future with this guy. if you haven't met his family but he has met yours i think you need to start to need looking at if you want the same things, if not and he is petty about money then I think you know what you need to do. You deserve someone who will treat you with the same love and respect you give them
2007-03-03 13:13:52 · answer #9 · answered by Lyns 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
friends with benefits. If you were truly dating you'd be out doing "couple" things you'd have met his family by now. I'd confront him as to where he sees things with the two of you going, you deserve someone who will take you out and be proud to show you off. This is just my opinion hope this helps
2007-03-03 13:12:21 · answer #10 · answered by Kitikat 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think he uses you for sex and money and you should find someone else. You have wasted enough time on this jerk.
Find someone who is worthy of you.
Hadn't you already figured this out?
2007-03-03 13:10:49 · answer #11 · answered by Tenn Gal 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋