Did my ex break up with me because she has depression?

Question

My ex broke up with me 1 mth ago after 8 mths together.

After 5 mths out of the blue she said she was unsure abobut us. I asked why, I said that we had loads in common & the spark was there, she agreed, but said she wasn't sure. Within 2 hrs she apologised & said she had been down & it made her irrational

Everything was good again for 2 mths then again said she wasn't sure. We both got upset & she said she was really sorry and hated when she was horrible to me. She said that she felt that she held me back (because she has chronic fatigue & is often ill). I said that was never the case and never will be. I suspected she may be depressed as she had that in the past

6 weeks ago she said she "wanted to end things as her feelings had changed over a short period". She admitted she was suffering from depression (her dr agreed)then took it back 1 wk later saying us was the cause of her being down & she wasn't depressed & didn't need help

What do I do?? I would like to be with her

Answer 1

I think you need to have a good talk with her at a time when she isn't upset, explain everything the way you have here and try and sort it out. If she is depressed then maybe giving her some space might help. Hope it all works out!

Answer 2

That's a tough one-sometimes when someone is in a situation they don't like, they can get depressed, and sometimes depression makes someone not like a situation that they normally WOULD like. I guess if she is getting treatment for depression, she may decide she made a mistake if it is the depression messing up her thinking. I don't think that there is anything that YOU can do except sit it out. If you are good friends with one of her friends or a sibling of hers, you could ask some, or volunteer that you still want a relationship with her, so if things get better, she knows the door is open.

Answer 3

Being with a person who suffers from depression is like death. it sucks you in and you feel guilty, as if you are the cause. I certainly would not leave somebody because they were depressed, especially if we were together for a long time. But I would advise you, with every fiber in my being, to take the out and leave, since it has been her decision, and you have not been with her for all that long. No matter how much you love her now, you will find that you come to hate her and yourself. I said at the outset that being with a depressed person is like death. No, I think it is worse than death.

Answer 4

you seem to love her, I would help her by getting medical advise together.If your sure its depression
I would also stay clear of coventional medicine for now.
firstly try an alternative approach and remember do not mix herbs with conventional medicines because of possible contradictions.
firstly contact the finchley clinic and speak to Mark.
secondly contact G.baldwins and ask them for a list of herbal practitioners or where you can find a recomended doctor in herbs.
you would like to be with her so be paitent, if she is not depressed try counseling.Listen to her

Answer 5

sounds to me like sure is very confused. as much as you would like to be with her. i think it is time to move on . maybe she really isnt sure about the both of you . maybe she likes someone else and cant make her mind up between the two of you. or maybe she needs some counceling. whatever the case. you need to figure it out so you can go on with your life. because in the meantime all your doing is making yourself depressed. GOOD LUCK

Answer 6

You need to have a serious talk to her. Sounds to me like she does need help and with your help and the doctors she can get through it.
I have been there many times myself. Good luck for the future.

Answer 7

you cant do anything.

maybe you are what is making her depressed. its not nice but it can happen.